I feel so stupid
I feel so numb
stabbed by a cupid
swallowed every bullet
from the gun
dreams are lucid
I see a face of someone
the voice is muted
silence took it
I will be as dark once I burn
in ashes I will breathe
and in stone I shall beat
following shadows don't leave
to dark corner it leads
where shapes do not make sense
and the walls are hollow
only emptiness to repent
awaiting morrow
where the heart shall sing
in the cool breeze
sipping on morning dew
and no tears to weep
no mare to bleed
a place beyond the pines
where the world still keeps
the dreams sweet
in the night it falls asleep
waking to a dawn
with another soul to reap

I'm walking in darkness
All alone
Remains of the dead beneath my feet
The living has long gone
Black clouds thunder up high
Stars appear to fade
The fire is falling from the sky
Cold wind blows across my face

The leaves are falling from the trees
Circling around me
I hear them say
"look we are finally free"
Ready to go our own way
I envy them
Wish i could take their place
And fly away with the wind
In search of a forgotten face

The night is becoming cold
A strange silence is all around
I can hear my heart beat
Loneliness is all i have found
The winds are becoming stronger
And smell of defeat is in the air
It feels like they'll blow forever
Until I am here

I see cursed souls surround me
Haunted by their dreams
All day they just hide around me
Come about at nights to scream
I have walked for many days now
Every new day marks beginning of me
It may seem
For every night i get old and die
To walk in my broken dreams


*I have already surrendered
To the cursed dark of slumber

.
.
.

how things change
people don't remain
the same

again
it rains
the same

again
it pains
the same
again



it takes your name
again

and the same story grows old
so cold
in questions and answers

why was I forsaken
where were you mistaken
when It was all taken

my heart was broken beyond
any mechanical healing
you could have saved me
for someone else.

grey windows won't speak
gloom has set upon the moon
another winter
is in awakening

tears are wet
the eyes have wept
and soon
the coldness shall loom
and rule

in all directions but here
within my heart
where we still play

dancing beneath
a burning moon
in a golden room
where we will stay
waiting for another spring
to become and bloom
into many dreams

how you make me broken
shivering
inside my flesh in the crowd
my scars are open
withering
as the dark beats loud


would you not come
and save me from myself
or are you finally done
and I can make my way to hell


there's so much to learn
and breathe when there's no one
every empty space
waiting for someone

howling in the dark
searching through the scars

when emptiness is more
haunting than the silence
then there are no doors
only walls that are silent



I have died countless times
nameless hours
seething in the abyss
for a loveless heart
breathing the smoke
and nurturing dreams
nursing the scars
as the skin screams


wake me from this slumber
hold my hand and feed me to a cage
make me
a prisoner within my own mind
and remind me
what preaches the sage
about what's fair

finding clues
of skies and stars
near and far
inside of a heart
drinking
blueberry poison


inking red
across the corpses
dying arm in arms
in the coldness of dark
full of scars and worms
together and warm
once

when was i this greedy
sinking into this abyss cold
there is no way out now
no more arms to hold
and warm

I am calm
haven't eaten in days
but who cares
every last of them go away
why am I the last one to stay
in memories

it hurts more than I ever knew
but I've to act my part that is due
and remember
that no matter what you do
never feel less than yourself

I have walked less
than I have dreamed
and now it seems
I don't know myself
between the realms

tomorrow is strange
I'm afraid what I'm leaving behind
it sure has pained
in war between heart and mind
how it reminds
i was alive

light
escapes through the smoke rings
making a shadow
on the withering walls
air howls of fall
there is something grey
burning
filling the room with ashes
of what I lost
my all

struggling to breathe
and an ache too deep to hide
drowning in mist
nobody by your aide
only an illusion
that you harbor
to keep yourself safe

being young and naive
is harder than it may seem
because we forget
the rest
and only bleed
what we can have
instead of what we want

if I leave like this
I would have preferred the lies
all of those monsters
that pray and pry
they don't know yet
but the night is getting over
and I see a blue sky
the noise is getting lower
I am here and I would not die

how do you feel when she just goes away
and you keep wondering why she didn't stay
how do you feel when she just forgets
and you start living your life in regrets
what happens when she even forgets your name
instead of love all you get is pain
and as the time goes by
you think you are going insane
and there's nobody to help you
nobody to wipe off that stain
and what do you do when you're just left alone
every night you pray but in the morning you're still on your own
how do you feel when someone you love doesn't loves you back
but still you go on giving them everything you have
you keep thinking about them all night and day
they just take you by the heart and throw you away
how do you breathe when you feel so used, back-stabbed and abused
you kept thinking about making it all alright
but now you are confused, no one can help you, not even you
what happens when she looks in your eyes and see herself
but when you look back in hers it's somebody else
its so ******* painful, you wish you could die
but you promised yourself that you will never cry
but what happens when every promise turns out to be a lie
and people who you would've died for, don't even care if you die


what happens when you know
you can never let go
and the one you love so much
doesn't even know
you keep telling yourself
that its all gonna change
but you know in your heart
It will always be the same
you know you are alone
and will always remain
what happens when love becomes
the reason of your pain