I am powerful even if I feel weak                                
the words I choose to speak, are not for you to illustrate
I'm not going to wait for you choose my fate
I may lose, but you'll never win again
My soul is mine for me to keep
not for you to reap
So leave, Before I become to powerful

what if she isn't broken just sore ,
What if she left and doesn't want to come back
what if she's she's drained but there's still some left to pour
what if it's a boy who's broken
what if he's lost and to sore to get up
what if he's empty an there's nothing left to pour
what if he wants to be filled
what if he's the one that needs help
what if he's the one we need to write about besides a girl
what if we told him that he's handsome
what if we told him he can be prince
what if we saved him
what if we tried to tell him he's loved
what if he listen like the girls do when we write about them
we won't know unless we try
what if........

maybe if i did things differently
maybe the outcome wouldn't have been this bad
maybe if i stayed with you mom
maybe my little brother wouldn't be dead, maybe this all my fault,
maybe if i just forgave him for intruding my body
you wouldn't hate me as much mom for putting him away
maybe if i forgave you for all the abuse over the 15 years you wouldn't hate me
maybe if i was better with dealing with things wouldn't think of me as a problem dad,
maybe if i was normal you wouldn't yell as much dad
maybe if i wasn't 20 pounds over weight you wouldn't make fun of me, maybe if i died you understand i do have problems that can't be fix in 365 days
maybe if i didn't  have ptsd you wouldn't complain about taking me to therapy, just maybe.....