let's wander
exploring new places
we'll wonder
how we could ever be the same

let's ponder
oodles of  ideas
and over yonder
we can make a new name

our comfort zone
may feel like home
but heaven knows
where we might roam
discovering that where we're from
is not all that is to come
there is more than your hometown
be willing to live upside-down

let's adventure
into the unknown
this will quench your
curiosity

let's take the bench here
and appreciate the beauty
we'll entrench your
heart's ferocity

the only map we have to guide us
is the voice we have inside
the paths that we can take are vast
no more looking to our past
only we can choose our fate
our journey is what we create

when you're crazy                            I'm trying to reach out to you
the whole world                                              
revolves around                                                  
you  
and
the constant noise in your head                       You won't listen
assures you time                                        I try and reassure you time
and time again                                                     and time again       
that pushing away                                                  that I'm here
everyone that cares about you                     I care about you
is the best option                        sometimes the best option is to lose  
there is no "plan B"                                            and make a "plan B"
the only thing to do is fight                         you don't have to fight me
i'm not so sure if i'm                                    i'm not so sure why you do this
crazy                                                       ­               you're being crazy
narcissistic,                                             ­                and narcissistic
or both                                
refuse to back down                                    you refuse to back down
fight or flight?                                           i don't want to fight with you
pride on the line?                                is not our friendship worth more?
fight                                                     ­                  stop fighting me
even if i know i'm wrong                      it's okay to be wrong sometimes
fight                                                 ­                             i'm tired
with all of the people i love                  of fighting with someone i love
tear them apart because                               of you tearing me apart
it's better that, than me                        is losing people really better than
feeling                                                    ­                           feeling
guilty.                                                          ­                     *guilty?

still taboo
but not really
needle inching in
my skin
permanent
marking
my body is just another journal
waiting to be filled
with thoughts
ideas
pictures
and who are you to tell me
what to put in my journal
i'll fill it where
society says
so i can hide it
for a job
but I will fill it with the things
that make me tick
i wear my heart on my sleeve
so why not put my journal
on display
too.

Today I have decided That;
The Butterflies are welcome
To flutter in my tummy
My heart can pound as hard as it wants
As long as its still drumming
I won't hide my huge *** smile
I'll show my red face for awhile
All because you make me feel
That feeling that makes you feel REAL
You make being alive worth it
Life doesn't feel like such a death pit
Every time that you smile
It makes EVERYTHING worth while.

writing essays is an art form
writing poetry is easy
no real requirements
as sloppy as you'd like
the sloppier the better
emotion shines through
no word count to limit you
no punctuation required
you are free to write what you want
not restricted by a prompt
i would rather write poetry
but it seems with essays, i am swamped.

unaware,oblivious
you're constantly talking
talking is not required
kiss me

never have i had so great a time
all so lovely
each brings something different to the group
all equally odd
you brighten up my life
each a different ray of sunshine
slightly dysfunctional
laughter is a promise
there in times of need
so valuable
the definition of awesome

Becoming brave I walk tall
Not afraid to stumble or fall
Dauntless I will walk the streets
To appease the wanderlust of my aching feet
No idea where I'll go
Or what the adventure will sow
Fear has no reign over me
Like a bird, now I am free
Explorer of the world we know
Like a flower my soul will grow
My only guide the moon, and sun
I'll break out into an all-out run
Sprinting past the fields of green
I will barely ever be seen
Disappeared into the night
Still a child of the moonlight.

calling me a child
is a little bit childish?

sometimes i get scared that
you won't be there
so i try and look for
a back-up plan
there are plenty of options
to fall back on
but i don't want any of them
so stay with me from dawn
to dusk
each and every day
i'd be called lady luck
and if i can light up your face
like you light up mine
it's  only by grace.

have i given
too much of myself
away?
maybe i'm breaking at
the seams
and it seems
i am worse off
than i thought
bottled up my problems
now they're leaking
from the top
thought i had some me
to spare
that there was enough of me
to share
but i gave myself away
and now i sit
in a hollow shell
wallowing in
my own personal hell
tried to make people feel at home
but all i am is skin and bone
people are not meant
to be made into homes
the base of humans
is fragile bones
there is no concrete
to keep me steady
when life starts
to get too heavy
i built my home upon the sand
but it seems the walls wouldn't
stand
if you're going to make
a human your home
maybe you should
be your own
because until you have
a strong foundation
you can't attempt
to be someone else's
salvation
because the foolish man built
his house on the sand
the foolish man made a home
out of man.

Sometimes I get in a rut
and writing becomes a chore
i forget the feeling of release
that writing brings to my core
i need that escape from my every day routine
because not writing for me
is like forgetting how to breathe
busyness has been my excuse
but i have kept in feelings
that need to be let loose
stress is gnawing on my soul
i'm ready for the weather to be cold
ready for the Christmas season
i'm coming up with countless reasons
for why i want to go back
so many i lost track
friends and family wait at home
church
release from work
but i know here is where i belong
anywhere else would be wrong
i can beat the
heat
with God no one can
defeat
me.

i am a restless spirit
everyday i crave adventure more
caged is no way for a bird to live
every freedom granted makes
me yearn for another open door
what sounds like song to you
is actually a cry for help
still feeling trapped
is this my home?
maybe i'm not even a bird
i'm a lioness on the prowl
bold and daring
dangerous
always hungry for more
adventure
or maybe i am just a girl
just a writer
trying to find my place in the world.

and i am no longer
underneath your spell
i feel numb
but it's hard to tell
will this last?
or will i ease back in
or is my pain just masked
i can't tell because  of how long it's been
how long has it been?
long enough, that's for sure
i have long since felt abandoned
i have long since been taken in
but i don't know how to feel
without your spell i am numb
will i resist or easily succumb?
i am reminded that even though
it might provide pain
emotions are beautiful
it might be nice to feel again

Sometimes you wake me up early
to ignore the cold
and embrace your warmth
you interrupt my life
and i just have to tune in
and listen
i want to be used by you
no distractions
i want to live for the cause
no excuses
and yet i still fail to realize
that my days are numbered
limited time
the people around me are struggling
but my comfort zone and i aren't done snuggling
push my comfort zone away
i'm here to live for your name
Hallelujah i cry out
you wipe away my fear and doubt
i'm standing on the ledge
now all i need to do is jump
because compared to you, nothing else in all creation
can trump
sometimes i get lost and confused
i put myself first
i end up bruised
that kind of sinful nature
is what brought along the hearse
there is nothing I can do
to break this dreadful curse
but in Jesus' name I'm saved
so now I'll live in Reverse.

i am becoming content
with

silence
in a world where silence
is often very

disquieting


i am becoming content
with silence
in a world that demands
to be heard


i am content
being silent
sometimes it is nice
just to sit back
and listen

i am content
in your silence
because words
are not always
necessary

the world is filled with so much noise
and not all of it is worth listening to

can you be content in silence?
can you be content being silent?
are you content with my silence?

as i sit here in silence i ask
these questions
but i receive no answers



only silence.

Fake
You put on a pretty face for everyone else
But you have showed me underneath the mask
Should I be grateful for that?
Because you unload on me
Everything
Constantly irritated
You're always a loaded gun
And our friendship is like Russian Roulette
I never know if or when you're going to blow my head off
Fake
Pretending like everything is okay
But ripping my head off when no one else is around
How long am I supposed to go along
With the act?
We have our good moments
and those are really good
but most of the time
you are a bull ready to charge

i was fine
with sleeping alone
until i realized i could
be sleeping with you
by my side

You see the prejudice runs deeper
than just racism or sexism
the problem is
this "us and them" mentality
the problem is
separatism
when you separate people from all the prejudices
all you see are a bunch of humans
there is no
"us and them"
we are supposed to be
one nation united
instead we are
one nation divided
too focused on outward appearances
not focused enough
on what everyone is actually made up of
guts
if you boil down to it
everyone can be summed up into
a skin sack full of guts
too focused on location
that we decide
that some people
don't deserve help
because they aren't "one of us"
so focused on our differences
that we miss the similarities
so focused on what offends us
caught up in our own prosperity
when it all boils down to it
we're all composed of the same stuff
just in different combinations
all simply human
across the many nations
every single one of us
is a warrior of our own personal battles
we feel the need to shake up
other's lives as if they were rattles
why have we become a culture so poisonous
quick to strike anyone
who doesn't agree with us
kindness has become a rarity
most of us would rather please ourselves
than give to any charity
I'm not saying that i'm not guilty
i'm just saying that
we all need to try a little harder
to smile at passing strangers
to pass a little kindness
because it's become endangered.

if all i need to do is move on
then why does it feel so....
wrong
i hope it doesn't take too
long
because my fragile strength is
gone
i'm exhausted by everything this month
everything is getting to be
much
I'm just ready to be
done
done with so many things on my
plate
they all need to just go
away

just a girl                       (nothing special,)
human                           ( just like everyone else,)
trying to make a dent
in the world                ( but i'm barely scratching the surface)
                                         ( i  am just average,)
i am                                (nothing special)
nobody

The cure to 3 am sadness
tylenol pm at 10.

forgetting you,
are you forgetting me too?
or do little things
still remind you of me
because i am reminded
constantly
do you look for me
in crowds of people?
hoping that maybe,
we might cross paths?
because i'm no good at forgetting
i just keep thinking about the past
i miss our long conversations
and how easily you made me laugh
but now it feels like
we're not even friends
this time things are different
this time there's less effort
and i'm trying to not try
but i don't want to say
goodbye
i've never been good
at letting go
so maybe i need a push.

I want to get lost in you
to pick a vein and follow the path
praying that it leads to your heart
but if it doesn't i'll travel the depths of you
searching for the right path
and if I end up in your stomach
maybe i'll give you butterflies
I don't want to end up in your lungs
because breath is too easily spent
do I take your breath away?
but maybe i'll find myself among your thoughts
and become the song you can't get out of your head
but I would rather dwell in your heart
and give life to every part of you
but if I find myself in your fingertips
I hope the words you write will be about me
I have never been great with directions
an adventurer willing to take the risk of getting lost
and should I ever find myself on your lips
I hope it's with a kiss

it's your birthday
and i didn't even think about you once today
it's your birthday
and i didn't even remember
i forgot
like you forgot
me
and my birthday
didn't remember till someone else
told me
and it occurred to me today
that i don't think about you
not even on special occasions
I.E :your birthday.

and you make time
for the things that you want to do
you make time for the people
you care about
even on your busiest of days
if you cared
you would make time
but my time with you
has run out
there is no longer
any time for me
in your day

come on skinny love
just last the year
can we last
will we last
the year
or will this be
our last year
please
pretty please
hold on
hold tight
we're strong
we can last
we can last
the year
say it's not so
this won't be our
last year.

When I grow up
I want to be just like
A sunflower
Always growing taller
Reaching for the sun
Brightening every room I'm in
Rooted in truth and seeding the Earth with life
Wild, free and beautiful
I want to be like a Sunflower.

chasing the sun

i broke out in a run

i'm in a full out sprint

i'm in pursuit of the wind

the sun went away

the sky has turned gray

rain pours out of clouds

all there is is now

i have to be brave

break out of my chains

now is where it begins

now is where it ends

it's hard to believe
that anyone could fall in love with me
that i could be the reason for someone's smile
how could i make someones heart pound?
or do i keep them up at night
or am i always on their mind?
maybe there's poetry about me somewhere
or a love song played on repeat
maybe i'm the person of someone else's dreams
if all of that is true,
could that somebody be you?

for now
i shall have to keep you
tucked away
in a  far away pocket of my mind
but i can't seem to find a pocket
secure enough
because you just keep
coming back
to the front of my mind
and i wouldn't mind
if it stopped
need to find my focus
but keep losing focus
need a pocket
big enough to keep
the thought of you
secure
but there isn't a lock strong enough
to hold back the thought of you
and maybe that would be easier
if you only took up residence in my mind
but it seems
that you have  also
taken up residence
in my heart.

maybe i shouldn't
wear my heart
on my sleeve
i'm so transparent
you probably
see right through me

i would like to dance with (you)
i have (never) been good at dancing
I (considered) taking lessons
but (my) time never allowed it
the music persuades  my (feelings)
(how) does it make you feel?
i warn you, i am (clumsy)
(of) course i'm a little nervous
it might take (me) a few times
(sorry) if i step on your feet
grace is not something (i) posses
i (thought) i should let you know
(i) have never slow danced before
because i have never found someone i thought (mattered) enough
to dance with.

forty seven days
until i'm free
no more lockers
no more hallways
no more homework
no more classrooms
freedom
on my own
sort of
i get to figure life out
early
who will be there to
catch me when
i trip
and fall flat
on my face
will you be there
to hold my hand
and lead me to new places?

can you see
how much i've grown
since i've known you
not just in height
but as a person
can you see
how much i've grown?
because i can
and i stand taller now
than i did before
but you've grown too
maybe not in height
but as a person
you grew
and i grew
to love you.

I warned myself
Not to let a person
Feel like a home
But I let down my walls
And built up new ones with you
Reconstructing what I thought love was
Should have brought a hard hat
Probably hit my head when I fell
For you
You've got me feeling kind of silly
Feeling kind of light headed
But never faint hearted
You keep my heart
And my stomach
Full.

It seems like every dry spell
Gets longer and longer
If words are like water
Well, this county has been going through
A drought for quite some time
Use that water sparingly,
Restrictions apply from 6am-12pm
Don't exhaust
Your resources
It seems between essays and normal conversations
The supply has run dangerously low
But you,
You brought the rain
The rain that ended this drought
Thank you for being my reason to write again
The world feels right again.

My music knows my pain
and mocks it
pandora on shuffle
it plays exactly what I don't need
it knows exactly how I feel.

out of my comfort zone
is where I belong.

how are you?

i want you to fall in love
with the way i talk to movies
like they're going to hear me
fall in love
with all my little quirks
like the way that i hold a book
or the way that i've read that same book
  five times
fall in love with the way i can't dance
but i always dance at the grocery store
fall in love with my yellow rubber boots
and how when i wear them
it's usually not raining
fall in love with my bad hand writing
and laugh at how it's been the same
since the third grade
fall in love with the way
that i get so into my tv shows
and how the characters become my friends
fall in love with the way i write
even though in college
i mostly write essays
they say that it's the little things that count
so        
         would
                    you
                            fall
                                      in love
                                                    with
all the little things about                     me?

this is my slogan
can i make it true?

everything is okay
little to complain
about
simple annoyances
but an abundance to be thankful for
good books to read
music to lure me to
sleep
grades to be proud of
paycheck
food in my belly
clothes on my
back
but i still want to go back
home
things here to explore
people i try and
ignore
wish i didn't depend on the bus
not something to really
trust
want to adventure
time taken up
work till late
is it worth what i get
paid
sleep is
hard to come by
these days
don't want to lose hours
with friends
waiting for long work shifts to
end
making the most
of my time
want every second to
count
don't want to spend seconds counting
change
want things to change
counting the days
till i'm home again
back with good
friends
making some here
refuse to let friends back home
disappear
like most people do
i'm stubborn like that.

we all carry sadness
differently
some people carry it in their eyes
some carry it in their heart
i carry mine
in my stomach
and
i don't feel well tonight.

please don't lie to me
don't tell me you're going to do something
and not do it
please prove me wrong
because now
i'm seeing that you're probably the same
same guy
different name
same crap
different day
but it's not supposed to be this way
so please
prove me wrong.

(Do you) know what you mean to me
I don't know how to explain it, you just make me (feel) happy
Things aren't (the same) as they used to be
(I) don't know what to do
So I'll just sit here and (hope)
I'll wait  for you to make the first move (so) I don't have to
(but) you won't do it
(if) I had the courage
(not) like a mouse
(that's) so weak
I would have told you
but I don't and that's (okay) ,okay?

sitting in silent confusion
lost in my mind again
lost my mind again
sitting silently
again
confused.

Trying to keep my cool
but you played me a **** fool
got my **** hopes up
even though I knew you would flop
you do it every time
but every time I expect different results
knowing deep inside
my first instinct consults
"Don't get your hopes up" It says
but nonetheless here I am.

I fell in love with you today
I barely even know your name
They say never to fall in love with a poet,
But I'm in love and I know it
Your words immediately capture my soul
For I know your heart is gold
They say actions speak louder than words
But I say that's for the birds.

Can you tell me
if it's time to let go?