I watched the sun rise from my window
And I couldn’t help but think of you.
I thought of new beginnings
And how I wish I could start over with you.
I wish I could go back to when we first met
I wish I could do it all over again
Maybe I wouldn’t mess up this time
Maybe this time things would turn out differently
Maybe this time you would love me

I’m jealous of every hand you’ve held.
And lips you’ve kissed.
And every secret you’ve told.
I’m jealous of everyone who has loved you before.
I’m jealous of every person who’s had the privilege of having their heart broken by you.
I’m jealous. Because I wish I was the first.
The first hand you held.
The first lips you kissed.
The first secret you held.
The first person you truly loved.
The first person who’s heart you broke.
I wish I was the first.
But I wasn’t.

When I look at you
My words never seem to come out right
They are jumbled
And boring.
Because you set a fire within me
That words can't put out.

I wish I was mysterious like the deep end of the ocean
I wish I was as cool as a spring rain
I wish I was  interesting like your favorite book
I wish I was as beautiful as a sunset.
But, alas, I am not.
I'm just me.
I am a nobody who can't be loved.
I wish you would notice me
But you never will.