Your words pierce my skin
Like a knife cutting steak
They go back and forth in my mind
Until they sever a piece
Of my heart off
Because that's what your words are meant to be
A weapon you use
Against me

People are leaving me
New people are joining me
People are meeting new people
Old friends are breaking up
These are all common examples
Of a thing called change
A thing that my mind is just not ready for
Because I can't take another goodbye

My notebook
Full of words
Letters
Commas and periods

My notebook
Full of smudges
Eraser bits
Crinkles and creases

My Notebook
Full of messages
Hidden Meanings
Energy and life

My notebook
Is the place,
The book
In which
I write

As I look in the mirror
I begin to stare
Who is the girl standing their
Faking her smile
Forcing her laugh
When really her heart is about to
CRACK
The mirror shatters
I duck to miss the pieces
Flying through the air
But as one passes by me
I just can't help but stare
The girl I saw before
Is still standing there
But now tears stream down her face
Because no one cares
No one cares how she feels
No ones kind enough to ask
So she wipes her eyes
Looks away
And walks away at last
The girl I saw in the mirror
During the summer when I was five
Has suddenly sprung to life
She is now alive
I'm the girl in the mirror
I reflect her
Skin and bones
So now I know how it feels
To feel like your all alone

You tell them your sad
And depressed
And tired
So you get attention
But your attention has expired
For once can it be me
Who has someone to care
Someone to tell me
"It's okay" when I'm scared
Scared of my thoughts
Swimming in a pool of anger in my head
They whisper and chant
"Be dead! Be dead!"
But you go ahead
And pretend to be sad
While I'm over here
Looking for a hand to grab

If I told you I was sad
If I told you I was lonely
If I told you I needed someone
If I told you I needed you
If I told you I'm drowning
In a pool of my tears
Well I've told you now
And it's been like this for years

Sitting at home
On a Saturday night
Check my Instagram feed
What a lovely surprise
All of my friends
Having the best time
And I'm here sitting
With tears in my eyes
But I should've known
When they said they were busy
That they were busy having fun
With people I called friends

And the caption says
"The crew is all here"
But they're missing a member
And she's sitting in tears
Feeling all alone
Because she's never invited
But she wipes her eyes
Because she has decided


I'm done with this nonsense
I'm done with all of it
I will hold my head up high
And I will learn to like it

So she double taps the photo
And that familiar heart appears
She smiles in triumph
She has conquered her fear