Reflecting shimmering as I look at you
you're me I see, but somehow there are two
one of them's wild, and reckless, and free
one thinks too much, can't just let things be
the first one travels and jumps off of stuff
the second works hard so there is enough
there must be a balance but I don't know where
so torn between you I'm pulling out my hair
I want nice things and a beautiful home
but I don't want to be stuck and not free to roam
I want a good job that I love and is "me"
like writing a book in a house in a tree
but the other me wants to make some money
and actually be taken somewhat seriously
decisions decisions as I try to "grow up"
but I'm Peter Pan and I'm totally stuck
If I give up my fun side and go for the money
I might be trapped where it never gets sunny
but if I give up the cash and chase after the sun
might have to work till I'm 90, and that isn't fun
one of you's brains and one of you's heart
which one is right? I don't know where to start
my heart has lead me to adventures untold
but my brain wants to know what else can unfold
i've followed my heart and she's struggled so long
my brain wants to taunt her and say she was wrong
as they stare at each other like strange cats in a path
the heart full of love and the brain full of wrath
the heart's always won, should the brain get a turn?
if I do that i'm scared we will watch the world burn
but if its the heart that I follow this time
am I just doomed to repeat this dumb rhyme?
insanity's the same thing again and again
expecting that maybe this time I will win
so maybe it's time to change up this story
and go for the "****" and the guts and the glory
one day I know that the two will entwine
then I won't have to choose 'tween my heart and my mind

He loves me, he loves me not
he don't love me, though he ought
but I don't believe that I deserve
and so I know i've lost the nerve
when you don't think that you are right
you've already lost that fight
though love, it really isn't war
we treat it as such, more and more
love exists in mind, not heart
and that is why we're still apart
If I could make my mind believe
then your love, I would receive

You're in my head and telling me
that I am not enough
You tell me that I'm ugly
and that I just don't have the stuff

I'm afraid to start a business
because I know that I will fail
all my fears come crushing
my dreams are coming stale

I'm not smart and i'm not good
nobody wants to be with me
I'm all alone forever
because of my past history

My brain it doesn't work right
it just spins out of control
I never finish anything
and that is your dark goal

I cry in bed and curl right up
and think that I can't move
I never want to go outside
and I don't believe in love

But then there is a whisper
telling me to raise my head
He speaks and I want to listen
He raises me from the dead

He gives me tools and insight
and shows me magic things
and now I can see clearly
with the confidence of kings

I don this mighty armor
and nothing works to pierce
for I'm a warrior of God
and now I'm something fierce

so the devil best start running
because I know he's done
I fight a winning battle
for God's already won.

swipey swipey left or righty
I could do this all freakin nighty
I'll never call you, never text
I know you're all just after ***
boys are silly girls are too
they want true love but a ****** will do
easy peasy lemon squeezy
nobody thinks this stuff is sleezy?

A long *** flight to parts unknown
A beautiful town becomes your home
With jagged mountains topped with snow
And crystal lakes lay far below
A bustling town with lots of bars
A canopy of brilliant stars
A jet boat ride a ledge bungy
A cruise with dolphins out to sea
Snowboarding with awesome friends
Until the season meets it's end
The adventure is continuing
It started off with canyoning
Sleeping in a car for weeks
To see new shores and snow capped peaks
From glaciers to beach in a single day
And free campgrounds where you can stay
Zorbing down a grassy hill
A private beach where you can chill
Caving through the dark abyss
Is definitely something not to miss
Adventures abound in these islands
And I'm gonna miss all my awesome friends
And now it's time to say goodbye
And to new adventures, off I fly.

Boats and more boats around this marina
thank goodness none of us got caught in Katrina
big boats and small boats, they're really yachts
the giant, fun toys of people with lots
gambling, eating and sitting by pools
lifeguards yell at kids to follow the rules
turquoise the waters of sparkling seas
it's so pretty here with it's cheerful palm trees
the waves lap up gently on crystal white sand
there's dolphins out playing in sight of land
a manatee swam right up to the dock
and nobody here is checking their clock
a turtle was swimming slow and relaxed
a bikini model lay out all freshly waxed
massages and facials, yoga and gyms
healthy and happy fulfilling their whims
a jet ski flies by and they holler in fun
everybody out getting their dose of the sun
by evening and rambunctious music parade
if you vaycay here then your life's really made

Little is a lot when it is in God's hands
Just rely on Him, when there's too many demands
Perfection is exhausting and it'll make you cry
you think you're not enough, and you always wonder why
If you thank Him for the blessings you don't think you got
then He will give them to you, and you will have a lot
The things we think we want, like money and attention
are not what we want most, I just want to mention
we desire freedom, and love and some respect
we think the only ones with this are the rich and the elect
that is not the case, they're in prisons of their own
drinking habits, *** scandals, and feeling so alone
Ferraris and mansions have never caused us awe
jealousy and frustration, though they sometimes drop a jaw
we ridicule the rich for how they use their stuff
even those with way too much, never think it is enough
the things we really value are kindness and humility
but humans are innately wicked and we lack the ability
to see how these things gain us the things that we want most
friends, respect, love, and joy, so just ask the Holy Ghost
You matter, you're unique no matter what it is you do
not everyone that's nice only wants something from you
If you don't know what to do and all you got is a beating heart
Thank God for all of it, that is the best place to start

It glitters falling ever faster
source is full and spilling over
clouds of eyes that have no master
wishing on a 4-leaf clover
twinkling down upon the leaves
it's sticking to the spikey clouds
watering down as though it grieves
and fallen tresses round it shrouds
source of water pouring out
heart of all it pulses rain
full and drenching now in pout
the earth is drenched in angel pain

I came upon some poems that tugged upon my soul
of tortured people struggling lost without a goal
I came upon some stories of pain and desperation
longing for a thing in life that requires preparation
I came upon some stories of people who cut to feel
who just want to be heard and treated like they're real
this world is full of fakeness and people spitting lies
ignorant of silent and lonely hurting cries
for some it boils angry, until they shoot it out
for others it is suffered silent in a lonely pout
for more it's drowned out with alcohol and drugs
what all of this is covering, could be solved with hugs
before you laugh, and scoff, and roll your eyes
put away the ******* of that tough disguise
I am not a hugger, I pushed people away all the time
but that is why I felt like I had to share this rhyme
once I started to let others love me and see them trying
then I started to love them too, and it stopped my crying
not everyone is trying to use and manipulate you
most of them just want someone to love them too
see, I was once a cutter, and though I owned a gun
and never once thought of shooting at anyone
but I hurt myself in different ways as often as I could
I couldn't accept love, and thought I never would
I drank myself ******* on more than one occasion
I didn't realize that my body suffered an invasion
your joy is the prize in this battle for your soul
give it to the One who loves you, that should be your goal
I made mistakes and I have scars that never go away
but I'm standing here to tell you, that I'm happy now today

Valentines for some may mean candy, flowers, rings
attention, love, and laughter, and lots of shiny things
Valentines for others may be a day to dread
the desperate and the lonely, who only want to wed
Valentines for some is a piece of Roman history
but much like real life love, it's a bit of a mystery
Valentines for others holds no joy at all
frantic restaurant workers or a nurse that is on call
Valentines in the end is really just a day
another one the Lord has made, whatever comes my way

Victory is the word of the brand new year
Where I have sworn no more crying, no tears
things will happen, I've seen when you pray
when you let God mold you like you are His clay
I tried slutty and drunken and crying all night
I tried sober, and hard work, and thinking just right
I tried forcing my mind to think the right thoughts
because if you think just right, it will bring you lots
I tried reading every piece of hope I could find
I obsessed and analyzed everything in my mind
Then finally I sat down, and I just let it go
There is no possible way that we can just know
What will happen to us in this life full of pain
Only God can turn it into a life full of gain
I looked up to the Heavens and asked Him to speak
I told Him I couldn't, that I am too weak
He calmed and brought such peace into my heart
He lead me to read His word, just this one part
He faithfully answers our prayers with awesome deeds
it was right there, so plain, He knows all my needs
He told me again and again to believe
and that if I could do that, then I would surely receive
so this is the year that my victory's sure
no more sitting and slouching and acting demure
there is a time for meek and patience and calm
and there's a time to believe and to act very strong
when there's faith in your heart it just comes right out
gives strength to body, lifts your head, ends your pout
last year was painful, I couldn't do it again
God put me through fire to save me from my sin
I don't know what my word of the year was last year
but I know now I like better what I see in the mirror
This year I know, I just feel it deep inside
that victory will come but not because I tried
It will come because God has told me it's so
and He's always faithful to His promises, this I do know.
So He prompted me to tell you all this little story
to inspire you all to your own year of victory

Politics politics all over the place
it's everywhere all up in your face
we talk about it when we don't know squat
everyone with opinions it happens a lot
humans presented like bright colored birds
puffed up flinging around lots of big words
you must vote for me 'cause I am the best
you'll make lots of money with plenty of rest
the government will solve all of your strife
and give you everything you want out of life
don't vote for that guy, he is just dumb
vote for me so you can carry your gun
don't vote for him, or you must keep that baby
you were ***** and he'll be a drug dealer maybe
if you vote for one then you have a choice
but only the choices that each came to voice
the sad thing is, they're all somewhat wrong
democracy lasts a few years then it's gone
we all came to listen to them taunt
freedom is the thing we all really want
freedom from fear and our financial woe
freedom to go wherever we want to go
freedom won't come from voting just right
from your perfect candidate winning the fight
freedom comes from God up above
freedom comes from accepting His love
freedom is inside you in all circumstances
so vote for Jesus, and you don't have to take chances

she wandered down a well worn path, that she had trod before
afraid that she would wander it again forevermore
there never seemed an end, to the random twisting ways
it was so confusing, that it left her in a daze
people she passed talked to her, but she heard not a sound
and she knew that she would not, till the exit she had found
they tried to interact with her, but she was not all there
because the winding road she trod, was with her everywhere
from time she to time she peaked, out of the windows of her eyes
to see if there was someone, who could heard her desperate cries
but the winding road had trapped her, and they just couldn't hear
so she continued wandering down the maze of all her fear
she knew there was an end, and someday she'd find a way
but unfortunately for her, today was not that day
she grabbed a piece here, and another over yonder
to try to put this puzzle together for a picture that was fonder
a picture of it working out and life all making sense
but too many pieces missing, just made her really tense
then there was a flash, and she sort of got a look
of a path that might open up behind a tiny nook
so she pushed a little there, and it started to give a bit
and that's when she decided, that she would never quit

I don't miss the holding hands
while sitting watching some live band
I don't miss the hugs and kisses
hoping you'll make me your Mrs.
I don't miss the spooning cuddles
whispering when we're in our huddles
I don't miss the loving gazes
feelings twirling all in mazes
I miss the silences we shared
because we knew the other cared
I miss that we both got our space
and neither on the other's case
your needs were just the same as mine
to have your peace and take your time
people always want too much
your emotional energy and such
people always want to talk
even on a "quiet" walk
people always want attention
and other things I will not mention
no expectations came from you
and that is why I could be true
to tell you what was on my mind
and just let both of us unwind
nobody gets it, or very, very few
but that is why I'm missing you.

Why won't he call?
I sit against the wall
why can't he just love me?
I sit under this tree
I dwell and I dwell
and I'm in circles of hell
my mind is so scattered
my heart is so shattered
all I do is think of him
when will our love begin?
Then there came light
at first it was slight
and I tried to fight
comfort in dark
alone in a park
isolation my home
curled up in my tomb
selfish desires sought
it was love so I thought
but that light it shined in
and it showed me my sin
wanting and wanting
my thoughts he was haunting
so I gave up my quest
and went after this test
love, what is this thing?
isn't it an engagement ring?
isn't it hugs and kisses?
and calling yourself Mrs?
the way he looks at you
cuddles when feeling blue?
friend at all times
partner in crimes?
but no, this voice said
that's all in your head
it's patient and kind
not him reading your mind
it lifts the other up high
even if it means saying goodbye
it's not in competition
humility is the mission
and when things go wrong
"I told you so's" not the song
the truth love cannot hide
nor push to be his bride
love is always protecting
not selfishness projecting
jealousy is not here
perfect love drives out fear
and hope never ends
and your way always bends
perseverance is committed
even if love is unrequited
For true love never dies
and it never tells lies
But there is no pain
when real love is the gain
so I gave up my heartache
for something most mistake
I gave up my crying
and all my dumb trying
fear and love aren't the same
with real love there's no game

Rise to the top
cream of the crop
lied all the way
to get higher pay
little greased palm
exterior of calm
smile and a wink
champagne clink
smooth sailing
girls railing
******* up the nose
you know how it goes
smarter than the rest
gotta be the best
control is the key

but now let me tell you what he doesn't see
he doesn't see that his lies are a trap
smart people can see right through all his crap
he backstabs and ******* and always complains
he's happy sometimes but not when it rains
when the storms of life come he has no strength
to get that fleeting happy he'll chase any length
he pushes away and ignores those who love him
he's covered in sins and horrors so grim
he hurts people, uses them, with never a care
he won't think of the future, no he doesn't dare
if ever a slight to his precious ego comes
then he gets so upset that he's nearly undone
he's the weakest of the weak but thinks he is strong
he never admits at all when he's wrong
he brings out the worst in all those around
and his voice is always his favorite sound
makes you feel like you're worth nothing at all
takes a hard worker who's kind and makes them feel small

But God sees a heart
one so torn apart
a lost battle field
that needs His shield
this poor broken man
who thinks himself grand
is a shattered soul
without a good goal
so immersed in this earth
forgetting new birth
he wants to be free
and this he can see
he just doesn't know how
thinks he's chasing that now
only One that can save
this poor foolish slave