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Mar 2014 · 2.4k
Husband
Thinking of You Mar 2014
Can I ask you a question?

Yeah sure.

No like one of those serious questions that most people never bring up on dates.

Okay.

What are you looking for in a future husband?

Well, first off, none of that typical stuff, like giving me roses. Not every girl loves roses. And if you give me those I know you don't know me. I'd rather have the purple and pink flocks that grow wild on the side of the road.

And if you're going to buy me jewelry, don't. I'd rather go to a destination than get a diamond.

And I don't want you to say I love you without your eyes speaking it too.

And don't complement me on how I'm pretty. Because if the only thing you can find positive about is is that I'm pretty then I've failed. I want to be so much more than pretty.

And if we're in public don't think you have to always touch me or claim me as your own. No insecurity. You should know I'm loyal without me showing physical affection infront of everyone.

But most of all, I want a man who I can believe in, root for, support and have the courage to not limit me to a wifely role but take me as his companion, his partner in crime.

Never below, never above, beside.
Mar 2014 · 1.2k
Half-done
Thinking of You Mar 2014
If you are the sun, then i want to be the moon and reflect the light that shines from you.
If you are sand, I want to be the sea and run myself all over you wild and free.
If you are coffee then I want to be the cream that makes you sweeter.
If you are a candle, I want to be the wick that burns down on the inside of you.
If you are a page, then I want to be the ink that gives you a voice.
Feb 2014 · 1.2k
Violet
Thinking of You Feb 2014
Do you love me or are you lonely?
If you are lonely keep me but if you love me let me go.
Because a long time ago lonely took the place of love and with you that's all I will ever know.
Feb 2014 · 1.3k
Oh Darling
Thinking of You Feb 2014
She looked at the ******* dressed young girl with a smirk.

"What, what's wrong?" The girl questioned.

She replied, "Oh darling, beautiful things don't ask for attention... I think you've forgotten what you are."
Feb 2014 · 1.5k
The one who walked away
Thinking of You Feb 2014
"But why?" He asked, "Why can't we just mess around and see where it goes."

"Because I made a promise to myself a long time ago that I intend to keep."

"What's that?" He asked.

"To never love anyone who treats me like I'm ordinary."

And with that she walked away with confidence, knowing that now he never will.
Jun 2013 · 1.3k
Limitless has limits
Thinking of You Jun 2013
Something remarkable happens when for a brief moment you forget that it is very possible to fail. - When a moment of brave prideful courage overcomes you and you feel like you can consume the world. You take it personally, like a mantra bubbling up from your being, "I can fix it! I can fix it!!" But so many times when we get to the problem our courage is replaced with doubt; the mantra sinking into the crevices of where it hidden again. Within us. Waiting to be birthed. Waiting to fix, something.
Jun 2013 · 1.4k
Another Form
Thinking of You Jun 2013
I think that all writing comes out of pain. Every remarkable work harnesses compassion or strain that begs you to empathize with the pain that someone-something, has felt. It is pain that has taken another form, it appears differently in plots and characters; pawns in a sense, that grace the game board of life. Nonetheless, pain is present. The Bible. A God's suffrage for grace of an undeserving people. Shakespeare's sonnets that brought us to our knees with the agony of lost love.-a lover's sorrow. In every classic there is a tugging on our heart strings that invokes a reply of our emotions.

                       In short, Pain is Poetry.
Apr 2013 · 4.4k
Pelican
Thinking of You Apr 2013
Birds of a feather flock together. It's what the saying reads. But a lot of times I feel like I have no one of my feather to flock with, I am just a pelican alone at sea.
Feb 2013 · 972
Keeping me
Thinking of You Feb 2013
One day I just realized.
I had a goal.
I had a dream.
And I was the only one keeping me from it.
Feb 2013 · 1.3k
You are...
Thinking of You Feb 2013
You are the wind in my sails, the breath in my lungs, the magic in my wishes, the butterflies in my kisses, you are the stubborn pumping of this old aching heart.
Jan 2013 · 957
Optional
Thinking of You Jan 2013
I remember your laugh and all the good times we shared. I remember when we were a big part of each others lives. How I could depend on you, I was sure of you. And as I now see your life through pictures and captured moments that I'm not a part of I can't help think to myself, why did I ever think I didn't want to be a part of it? Why did I make you optional?
Jan 2013 · 1.1k
Always have, always will.
Thinking of You Jan 2013
I think the statement is true, if you stop loving someone you never did love them, and if you truly love someone you always will. I have people in my life that have hurt me, that I still deeply and passionately care about, whether they are aware of this or not. A part of loving is reserving a little spot of your heart to them, just them, and even if they decide not to take it, that they don't want it, or they've moved on, that spot always has their name on it. Always unconsciously waiting, reserved, just in case they ever want to return.
Jan 2013 · 968
The Almost.
Thinking of You Jan 2013
I don’t want to die a repeated flame of the should haves, would haves, could haves, to live a life of potential that is never acted upon. I do not want to stand at the resounding end, after my heart has pumped it’s last liter of blood and my lungs have taken in their last gasp of air and wish I would have done more with the ones I had. Wish I had loved more, gave more, hoped more, allowed myself to dream more; about the possibilities and complexities of life. Refusing to settle for a life of ordinary and average. A life of the almost.
Dec 2012 · 2.3k
Sincerely, Your Highschool.
Thinking of You Dec 2012
The schedule is set. The schedule cannot be touched. No. No. I do not bluff. Do not mess with my plans do not think you can change them, I have a way of completing them as I had previously arranged them. You will be kind, you will be neat. You will most certainly not drag your feet. Be on time. Leave swiftly when we are done. Remember, this isn't about having fun. You will take a test, choose an answer, A through D. You grades depend on your answers, no, you cannot plea. Because everything here is standard. That's why we call it a standardized test you see. We want to know how average you are. How basic can we make you. How can we take all of your skills, intelligence, capability and capacity and smush it together? A test of course, A through D, the letter you choose will determine what you mean to me. It will define you in the long run and can hurt or help a great deal. So don't buy into all of the nonsense that you are creative. No, we want none of that here, unless it is in the art room, and we're talking about paper and what you can smear. Because here it's all about what you "know" although I don't care if you understand or remember it. I'm just doing what the government thinks is best, they give me all of my money, so I always adhere to it. No, I don't care about you, your relationships, uniqueness, or capacity to change this world. I just care about what letter you bubble in on that test, so go ahead, pick C, so our statistics can go up and the school board will get an "atta girl."
Dec 2012 · 1.1k
One Thousand, Two Thousand.
Thinking of You Dec 2012
There's a thousand things you've done to hurt me.
A thousand things you've said to upset me.
A thousand ways I could justify my hatred towards you.
A thousand reasons why it would be completely okay.

But there's two thousand things you've done to make me happy.
Two thousand things you've said to make me laugh.
Two thousand times i've gone to bed with a smile because of you.
And I could hate you for the thousand things you've done.
But tonight, i'm going to bed with a smile on my face.
Oct 2012 · 1.3k
Wrong
Thinking of You Oct 2012
I used to think something was wrong.
That it was my fault.
That I couldn't move on.
That I was living in the past.
That it was my problem.
That there was something wrong with me.
But it's not my fault, my problem, or wrong.
It just happened.
In that moment it wasn't wrong.
It was perfect.
So when I remember it, it's not because I want you.
It's because you used to be everything I wanted.
Thinking of You Sep 2012
I just want to love someone and be loved in return. I don't want the texting, dating, flirting and getting to know each other. I don't want the attention, the thrill. I don't want a relationship status changed. I simply want to have someone I can say and be anything and everything with.
Aug 2012 · 1.0k
Jokingly.
Thinking of You Aug 2012
You jokingly asked me to marry you, and I jokingly said yes in reply.
We laughed about our lives, and how we promise to never lie.
You said it would be a big ring, I asked if you would love me forever.
You said until death, forever and ever.
You said you loved me, Jokingly, I said I loved you too.
You said let's grow old together.
I can't deny, sometimes I almost want to.
Aug 2012 · 1.0k
Heart Speaks
Thinking of You Aug 2012
I wish I had the eloquence of words to utter what my heart speaks to my soul boldly everyday.
My heart has faith in you, it speaks only kindness in your direction.
It is confident that you have a powerful, wonderful, bright future ahead of you, and that you are going to do great things.
It believes you have a heart for people, and it is confident in it because you have told it things you have never told any other soul before. It knows you, and knows you are good.
It wants to always be close to you, because it admires you so, and sees you differently than most people. Some people say love blinds, but really love reveals.
It reveals the best in everyone.
My heart has seen the best in you, and wish others could.
And although it would like to hold on forever, it knows that you are not it's to keep.
It must let go of you, because your place is not in the captivity of it, no matter how comfortable it may be.
So it sets you free, with a soft sweet kiss that says more than it's lips could ever murmur.
Hoping one day, you know how much you are loved.
Aug 2012 · 1.4k
Deepest Part Of Me.
Thinking of You Aug 2012
I want to know you.
I want to know the deepest entrails of your being.
To be consumed by the overwhelming warmth of your presence that surrounds me, and the knowledge of your goodness.
I want to give you everything, down to the deepest crevice of my soul.
Leave Nothing, untouched.
Move me with the power and grace that flows from your calmness. Consume my thoughts and form them into yours until we are one, engulfed in the power of your love. Show me I don't have to yield to my own ways or return to my old shame. I am broken, make me whole.
Come into the deepest part of me.
Aug 2012 · 1.2k
Far, far, away from home.
Thinking of You Aug 2012
I am going to the moon, see you sometime soon. Off into the dark abyss I flee.
I am launching forward, setting a course, where the wind and the waves are far from me.
I am going to the cheese entrenched in the black expanse of the system.
I wish the television might give me some mention. "She travels where no woman has dared to go alone."
They chant kind words and put me on a digital throne.
I reach the crater with one big thump, with all of these holes there are sure to be some bumps.
And as I step off I see, the entire world is looking back at me.
The blue and green marble that I cherish as my home, far, far away, I feel terribly alone.
I look back at everything. Everything I have ever held dear or hated.
The people I love, the ones abhor. All of my dreams I see them faded.
The big blue ball holds all life except for me, you would think I would feel free.
Except that is not the case at all, I feel terribly, terribly, alone.
Far, far away, from home.
Jul 2012 · 993
It's not that I love you.
Thinking of You Jul 2012
Your eyes inadvertently traced the details of my face, as if you were studying a map you couldn't understand, or trying to find where a piece went in an extravagant puzzle. I don't know if you were consciously aware of your eyes actions, or my hearts reactions to your gaze. But when you smiled at me with that twinkle in your eye, my heart is instantly set ablaze. It's not that I love you. Honestly I don't. And it's not that I want to be with you, because I refuse, I won't. But there's something about your presence that can't help but set me on fire. Why is your affection something I greatly desire?
Jul 2012 · 1.9k
Flirtationship
Thinking of You Jul 2012
We always had that little spark between us,
which made simple things a joy when we did them together.
There has always been that magnetic energy between us, pulling us.
Closer. Closer.
We have an attraction for one another.
It's made public by the way we can't help but look at each other longly.
But we both know we will never be.
Because we are both smart; smart enough to know we aren't good for each other.
And even though our hearts try to pull us together, we know nothing will come of it.
We'll become closer and closer, but never close enough.
We'll talk until sunrise but that's the only thing that will come of it, and we both know it.
We have a flirtationship.
We flirt endlessly with one another, both knowing,
Nothing.
Will come of it.
Jun 2012 · 940
American Mouth
Thinking of You Jun 2012
I could pull up the old picture of us that always makes me laugh.
I could re-read our old text messages where you express your feelings towards me.
Or I could turn on the song we listened to in my car as it rained last night.
But I won't.
Because somehow I know you won't turn on American Mouth just to think of me.
May 2012 · 964
Free with Chains
Thinking of You May 2012
Let your mind go, wander, be free they say. Up to the trees where the blue birds sing.
Up high above this roof all problems will evaporate into the smell of cedar and pines.
Stop thinking too much is they say, but then they mention things I need to think.
Be free like the wind that rushes through these mountains they say, but their eyes hold me with chains.
May 2012 · 1.2k
The Little Things
Thinking of You May 2012
Often I find that things happen a certain way for a reason. It might not be obvious, it might not be a planned out thing. But usually behind every little thing there is a reason for why it happened. Little little things leading into little things, that lead it to kinda little things, that lead into things that aren't so little. Whatever you do, whoever you are. Be good at it. Even in the little little things. Because, eventually they will become big things.
May 2012 · 850
Mental Image
Thinking of You May 2012
All along i've had this slight mental image. This slight mental distortion in my mind. The image that I was missing something not living on the fence, or completely on the other side. I had this image that there was something appealing, about living only for yourself. To live a life of me me me, and to not care about Thee. But i've finally found what I could never see before. It's not everything it seems, the world and it's shallow dreams. All of the things that I thought would bring pleasure is a graceful illusion. That traps people in the same spot, but yet still no conclusion. The exact same spot. Compromise. Living so much less of a life than what their called to. Never fully fulfilling their destiny.
May 2012 · 1.7k
What Nature Brings.
Thinking of You May 2012
As I lay beside the pound the organic sounds mix with the industrial ones coming from the concrete structures not more than a few good pebble skips away; for someone who is an experience pebble skipper at least. I always envied my male friends at the river, grabbing a small rock and persuading it to transform into a water crawler as it made it’s way across the tea colored water. My stones never did that, they were determined to act like stones; sinking into the brown abyss with one big splash. The sound of the water filling the gap my stone fell into, the swift reminder I could not convince the matter to do as I please. The sounds around me now give me a peace as I hear them. The vague rustle of the leaves as a working bee buzzes through them, bravely determined to fight through the grass jungle to reach the sweet nectar on the flower that resides hidden inside.
      Nature always has a way of projecting a determined spirit; I can see it in the weeds growing in the cracks of the sidewalk. No matter how many times they are damaged, torn, poisoned, or malnourished, they always strive to grow. They have never ceased. Not once have they given up, they have a natural hope they hang onto. That they can recover, no matter how much they’ve lost. Organic life, nature, brings hope; it brings the wish of recovery, the willingness to adapt, and the ability to change. Just as the rocks leap from my friends’ hands, and turn into something they’re not, choosing to become more than a stone, refusing to sink. This is what nature brings. It brings Hope.
May 2012 · 2.2k
I hope you think of me
Thinking of You May 2012
Enchanted would not define the emotion that struck my being when yours eyes met mine.
You peered right into the depths of my soul, and I into yours.
Even others could see it, what we had.
Your band mates kept looking at me as you smiled and winked toward me.
My friends with me on the front row giggled and laughed about how you couldn’t keep your eyes off of me. But I was too busy staring into your soul as angelic melodies poured from your lips to listen to what they had to said. You sang the concert just for me the other 1,000 people weren’t there.
And when I placed my hand on my heart when the lyrics feel your love came up and you looked into my eyes and did the same, I was positive my heart jumped out from under my hand into your arms.
But it unfortunately remained in my chest.
And you remained on stage, 15 feet away from my grasp.
Where you remained and eventually left.
My ears still ring with the sound of your voice as I drive home in a haze.
I hope you think of me.
May 2012 · 948
You were necessary.
Thinking of You May 2012
You were unusual, plain but different in your own faded way. You were a underdeveloped cloud that was somewhere between a heavy fog and one you might say looks like a rabbit. You were always in the middle of things, between my thoughts, within my words, in the midst of my intentions. You shook the ground you stood on without lifting a foot, but you were unaware of the affect you could have. You were ever present in my thoughts, until the day I found your presence unnecessary.
Apr 2012 · 1.8k
Sail Boat
Thinking of You Apr 2012
What if we ran off into the inked darkness with nothing to wrap us but the cool, fog-lined summer’s air.

What if we forget all of our problems and let laughter and games of immature hide-n-seek take their place.

What if we decided to give up everything for the chance to find something that we weren’t sure existed.

What If we left tonight.

Meet me at the sail boat, we’ll drift away together.
Apr 2012 · 830
True Love Collects Dust
Thinking of You Apr 2012
He found me, and just, looked at me, my likes, dislikes, bad hair days, bad moods, and awful thoughts. He looked at all of my shame, all of the hate, and decided He had to make me a clean slate. He wrote me a note, a little letter directly to my heart, After I read it, He told me He had a whole book I could read if I wanted. I said I would like to and asked where I could find it, but He said "You already have it, dusty, on one of the shelves in your room."
Mar 2012 · 1.1k
Forget.
Thinking of You Mar 2012
And so it all comes back.

Every wrinkle in your squinted eyes when you smiled towards me.
Every Laugh we shared.
The long talks and nights under the stars.
Every absent conversation afterward.
Every Blank Stare.
Every night with a tear stained pillow wishing you were there.

The reasons I adored you.
And the reasons we left.
The reasons I care and the reasons I'm pretending I don't.
They flooded in with the remembrance that hung in your gaze.
Everything I had erased has now come back.
I remember you now.

I wish I could forget.
Mar 2012 · 907
Little Wood Pecker.
Thinking of You Mar 2012
Dear little wood pecker pecking at my brain,

Please stop if you care at all about me staying sane.
You are small in shape but huge in sound and your beak is pecking and the most fragile part of the ground.
I wish you would go away, or peck at something else.
Because you see if what you were pecking was to be taken, I am not sure how I could respond.
There isn't a back up plan if that rope were to break, and i'm not sure exactly how far I would fall and to where it would take.

It is the only thing in the present I see to focus on and the only thing I see worth keying in on. If I had a back up plan, sure, you could peck away, let your beak not wander or stray.  But right now your pecking at the only reality I see, so please please wood pecker would you hasten you beak.
Mar 2012 · 821
Someday You Will Find Me
Thinking of You Mar 2012
Someday you will find me.
You will look me in the eyes, and I will just know.
No second guessing.
No questioning.
Just the knowledge that it is right.
And that moment, that moment, will be one to remember.
That moment, is the one I am looking forward to.
Mar 2012 · 1.1k
We Were The Best
Thinking of You Mar 2012
We were the best at nothing.
We were the rulers of lost times.
We we the saints of our own sins.
The ones that were bound in the abyss of getting by.

One day would never come.
Realization would never reach our nerve endings.
We were the best at being satisfied with dissatisfaction.
Just enough to talk but never enough to change our ways.

We were the best at longing for love, while lacking the self-control to wait.
We knew the one was yet to come, and we were discontent, but content enough with not all of the something we wanted.

We were the best at thinking about changing.
We were the best at negative hopeful thinking.
We were the best at lying around like sleeping beauty waiting to be awakened to finally begin our life.

Lying.

Dreaming.

We were the best at waiting for our lives to begin.
Mar 2012 · 1.5k
The Isolated Star.
Thinking of You Mar 2012
As I laid on the roof with my back against the shingles and the guitar over my chest, I could glance out toward the right and see dashes of heat lightening rapidly setting the sky aglow for a few short moments, while I watched the last remnant of color diminish from the cloud above me.

I wondered what the cloud was seeing, it still had the warmth of the sun that i could no longer gaze upon. I watched as it slowly faded into the blackness I was in. It seemed instantaneously after the cloud disappeared into the blackness a star was there to take it's place. I began to notice the crevices in the oak tree above me, as the twilight made out it's shapes.

The only light the earth was yielding were the few stars above me that weren't blocked by clouds I could no longer see. I looked across the street and saw a dimly lit lamp post, that looked like it could have been from a mythical time, it was surrounded by branches that it's light could just reach to outlines of their vegetation.
As I breathed in, I set my head on the roof I knew to be grey but now was black, and found my gaze anchored on one small star out by itself, absent from any other form of constellation. It flickered, as if it was an aged lantern, far way in the distance, who's light was ailing to die out.

While I watched the lantern I unconsciously observed the lamp in our neighbor's house across the street present itself, once it did a man placed himself in a chair to read, while I was watching him I began to ponder about the activity in all of the other dark houses around me,  all of us in boxes that we spend most of our time in. But then I was drawn back to my little isolated star, watching the ever so minuscule light glimmer, in the sea of black.

And as I watched, that weak star I had thoughts, I had thoughts of you, mainly of you. Somewhere, on this planet you were present. It's Friday, so are you out with friends, prehaps being a quarter back for a football team I don't know the name of, or on a date with a girl who's trying to make a good impression.
Then I pondered a thought, what if you were seeing something similar to what I had my eyes set upon. If you could be lying down, and looking up at sky, soaking in the atmosphere, and if you could be looking at the same solitude star I was peering into.

And then I just laid there, and could not look away, not for a moment, I was enjoying the knowledge of knowing we are both under the same sky, and you could be viewing the same star I was, and I imagined looking at you, and watching you study my favorite lonely star. And when I did, I didn't feel the night air on my legs, the marks in my hands from the guitar strings, the still damp bathing suit on my body, or the sandpaper like shingles that were beneath me. At that moment, I felt you, looking back. And that was enough.

— The End —