i remember how
you used to trace
my freckles with
the tip of your
index finger.
it was as if each
spot on the bridge
of my nose, set your
hands on fire.
it was okay though
because i have eyes
just like the ocean.
you always had a
place to cool off.
i guess you eventually
realized you rather
just stay inside.

We dreamed of becoming more than what we were.
And we escaped in the smoke that filled the room.

Our souls trapped...
Jailed behind our ribcages.

So we sat there...
Changing out the records.
Mouthing all the lyrics.

Waiting for the perfect moment to speak words.
Those times never came...

Instead we became more silent.

Inhaling the smoke.
Exhaling it all the same.

And I sat there wondering what else was out there.

I felt so comfortable in your surroundings.
Too high to realize what was really going on.

I broke the cycle.
The routine of a roller coaster ride that wasn't fun.
Longing for something more.
Wondering if I deserved better.

Even when I thought you were the best...
I started to question that.

My love for you may never die...
But my addictions did.

My tears brought on the clouds.
And I had to follow the sun.

No more.
No more tears.
No more love to give to you.

Just one more follower
to make it a century
excited to be read an heard
who'd a thunk it
ninety nine people
would read my nonsense
not me!

I'm not on twitter
so new to being followed
should i look behind me
or leap into the poetic unknown?
I think i'll keep taking the plunge
embracing the poetry collective
Will you join my family
and be my centurion? ;)

Oh unceratin chats are the worst
          For I have  to break free choices that come my way
  Are never clear as to what I really want
       How does my future look ?
  When decisions can't be made right away
       It's  either you or them do I chose to rather be with you ?
Or do I keep holding on to what needs to be let go ?
      What's the difference of being with you rather than spending time for you ?
   It's not the same I want magic to spark like a firework
       Dream of a night , where I do anything with you by my side never ending like a tunnel
       Enjoying it as much as me , new memories replacing the boring not so exciting

This desk is my island,
This pen; my sailboat,
My mind is the captain,
Exploring the world,

But,
I can never get far enough,
To know myself,
There’s too many miles,

Words can’t cover them all,

I barely know who I am,
Or even what I want,
Or if what I do; will mean a thing.

Though at times,
I am alone,
Others; I am not

I am my own worst enemy,

And my own best friend,

I could sail forever on this pen,
To a sea; misshapen and insecure,
To try and be sure,
Of an answer which may not,
Even be there.

But of this; I swear,

Whatever ship carries me,
To wherever you may be,
Whatever treasures,
I have to bare,
However adorned,
With all my scars and tears:

It’s all for you,
I reveal my insides,
I sift through the oceans,
And clear the skies,
I sail for you; my dear,
Until my last pen dies.

Guilt is all I feel from you
            eats me up & throws out cold tears
                     making me feel guilt
            telling me oh that wont happen
                    How would you know if it can & cannot
          Honestly my mind wants it to be the truth
                 When maybe its not ?
        Is there a way for me to escape it all  
                Guilt is where u leave me @
         When will truth/hope bring me back ?

My birthday & i'm over joyed
        the impossible is possible
      as i grow older i build up adult skills
            a special birthday i wanna
                remember till i grow old