Never forget to tell your children...that  it's okay to cry
Because it's that when words are forgotten,
They often feel like lies.

You only get one life
Unless you think there's an after
You're kept alive by your beliefs
And views you've shared may matter.

You get what you get
You can't change the time you were given
It's up to you to make that choice
Get up out of bed or stay hidden.
You've been given a script not yet written.

Talk to people you wouldn't dare to be
Who cares if you shouldn't
Atleast do it for me
Never let someone tell you
That just because it sounds fun
That it is fun
Wondering into adventure is different then walking into hell

Pick your battles
Build your worth
You live your whole life knowing you WILL DIE.
You don't get to know when.
Choose that coffee instead of water.
Drink that protein shake.
Can't sprint it?
Jog it. Walk it. Crawl it.
I don't care how
Just get there.

If you're sad or depressed...been there..
You'll wake up one day not thinking about
How?
Or
Where?
One day you'll wake up and feel the need to play in your storm
Don't sit in the rain
You'll drown yourself..
In the weather you make.

You're happy today? Good for you!
Just please make sure,others are too.

You get a future.
You get to breathe.
You get to choose
If you want to stay
Or the next day leave.

Stay fearful, it lets them know how much you care
Or if you care about losing something.

Remember that if one day
You forget your name
The people who truly love you
Will be surrounding you
So in life
Surround yourself with people
Who will every day remind you
Of who you are
Because they are as afraid of losing you
As you are of losing yourself.

Depression.
Depression took over my mom’s life.
Suicide attempt.
Bullied when she was younger.
Made fun of because her mom couldn’t always afford nice clothes.
My mom went to college and became a nurse.
She didn’t see me grow up, she was to worried about her job.
My mom wanted a divorce from my father, the first time I heard them fight about it was when I was 13.
Pills.
No sleep.
Barely eating.
My mother stayed in her bedroom most of the time.
Sometimes she made me breakfast though.
When I was little I use to want to sit at the kitchen table, my mom always said no, she had bad memories from when she was a child at the table.
Be careful what you say, she might get mad.
I love my mother even if she doesn’t always remember she loves me.
She has told me she hates me 3 times, she doesn’t remember saying that.

Little boys and little girls
Grow in to bigger boys and bigger girls
They get thrown into a never ending
Cage match
Fighting against peer pressure
Status quos
False idols
Impossible images
And it doesn't matter how old they get
Once they've been bit
The depression bug lives
A parasitic relationship
She's feeling down on her luck
Sees the case of her father's guns
And thinks to herself
I can end it all here,
I can stop all this pain
He's feeling invincible at 160
Miles per hour
He had a **** day and wants to forget
He keeps thinking
"This is it boys,
My big finish"
They always want to go with a bang
Make an impact
Make sure they cannot survive
She unlocks the case
He adds more pressure
She loads the chamber
He grips the column
She pulls the trigger
He hits the tree line
It's not a warning
When you commit the deed
But everything before hand can't always be seen
There's nothing worse
Than drowning on your own thoughts
That can change at the flick of a wrist

Sad Poems.
Sad Girl.
Sad World.
There is no light, I see only darkness.
I can’t remember the last time I was ok.
Eating Disorder.
Self-Harming.
Binge eating junk food.
I can't remember the last time I didn't do those things.

I started writing again a year ago for the first time since I was 8.
I started again in the hope that it would help me stop self-harming.
A healthy way to get my anger out, but for the first time in four months I self-harmed tonight.
I have cuts on my wrist, I have scars there from previous times.
I will have to start recovery again, I thought 4 months ago was my last time.
I’m not angry with myself, I have relapsed a lot.  
4 months is my new record; I should be proud of that.
I’m sorry Alexis that you know I self-harm, I’m sorry you will see new cuts again.
I’m sorry Josh, you had been amazing towards me since you found out I self-harmed.
I’m sorry I relapsed again Josh, you told me to pray to God, instead I wrote poems.
I’m sorry grandma, I know your worried about me.

I need you
*to kiss me