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Maxine Sep 2020
My grandma’s sister died this week, and for a second I thought her lucky. How death graced her like an old friend at a slumber party. Her eyes still as she asleep lay, unbeknownst to her that life was keeping a secret. He was leaving her that night - the longest relationship she ever had.
The news came in the morn and though she was old, it came as a shock still. I thought to myself, ain’t it strange how one has to succumb to death before their pain is noticed. Do I have to die too before you see me?

To her that knows death more than I do, Pain was your only friend in that hour but remember where you go no on can follow but the hopes and prayers of your rest. So I hold my breath and my heart sinks and I hope, so dearly hope you knew the life that Christ was and rest he would be to you now. Goodbye grandma.
Aug 2017 · 648
You and I
Maxine Aug 2017
We are drop dripping droplets
in blue ocean Waters , fountains
We are beautiful
Like the sunset and the sunrise
Like the you that my heart longs for
Fitting like a jigsaw puzzle
I will be the Eve to ur Adam
Bond strongly like an atom
I will send petals to your roses
And we will flow like the fountain
soar like a Phenix
I will wait for our heart beats to harmonize
Then I will sing to you my Melody
I'll sing to you my song
As our fingers intertwine​, soft skin
Our breaths, mere whispers in the wind.
Just you and I.
Jul 2017 · 1.1k
Drowning
Maxine Jul 2017
breath, you seem to be running away
mind, you seem to be lost
time, oh time you've never cared
life, you seem to have forgotten me

I'm trapped, trapped in a four corned room
a empty blank walled cell
an abyss of black nothingness
a prison

my limbs are heavy but
my eyes won't close
my double-minded heart is a stone
so I'm sinking and I'm drowning
drowning with my eyes wide open
drowning with an anchor tired to my foot
drowning with my eyes wide open
for all who are wondering what it feels like to drown
well it feels like nothing
it's empty

I want to move but I have forgotten how
I want to scream but my lips are locked shut
so I let myself fall
I let myself drown,
and Maybe I deserve it
infact I know I deserve it
I was living as a shadow of a shadow of myself
not knowing if I was ever going to live beyond this shadow of a person
I've lived like this for so long it seems so endless.

This is my state of mind.

Fight they say but
fighting isn't that easy
but then again no-one ever said it was
And honestly I'm tired of fighting and being strong
why do we fight
why should we fight
why do I fight

if everything I do is worth nothing
If all of it means less than that of the life of a goldfish
then why should I,
tell me why and maybe I'll listen
maybe I'll change
stop me from breaking before I stop breathing
don't let me keep falling
grab my hand and pull me to the surface


but
you never listened, did you?
you never noticed that my heart stopped beating
never saw that I was burning
and I was drowning
And I know it makes no sense to you
but it does to me
I asked and I cried but you still let me fall
You still let me drown

breath you never came back
mind you were never found
time you never waited
life you never remembered me
no one did

even after all I've said I can't really explain to you my pain
I'm waiting for the day when I can
I'll wait to be saved

— The End —