haze through shattered glass
fogged up windows
smoke screen air
black hole
light no where
not a single drop of light to be seen
no way to get through the haze
no way to
see through

fly me to the sky
let me soar
let my body fall
let me run through the clouds
jumping the memories
touching angels through the fog
I want wings
so I can fly all day long

breathing sunshine words
breathing life from my breath
singing the sun through my heart
and living from their breath

silk through my hands
life running through my veins
tongues of fish flying past
small rocks off the river bed
and feeling worries run of to the sea
feeling fish worry free
feeling burden rub off on rocks
and the water crystal clear with pure truth
clear like the sky
without a worry I run like a river

steeped on through my life
through bare feet and written lies
I see a world beyond the divide
where I can't be cleansed of dirt
and emerge with shoes on my feet

tears will drop
the ground will shake
pallets of red and gold
touch my soul
lower my body to the ground
so my soul can be the flora and fauna
and my body is one with the soul

I heat my body to bubbles
and maybe that's why I fly away
and why I snap
and why after I feel broken
all I need was to stay safe
in the confines of my mind

i think about the fallout
the pressure pushing me down
I think about the fallout
the emotions wearing me down
I think about the fallout
my body breaking all day'
I live the fallout my body cracking glass

some times I feel my insides are being punched
some times I feel the burn in my guts
sometimes I just want to yell
sometimes I feel the pain and just want to let go
I never wanted to hurt the people I love
and yet I can't let go of the secret
the dove that circles above my head
shakes every time it lays it's eyes on me
and I know I am responsible for the pain in it's Blue eyes
I know I will always hurt the most kindest of creatures
but what can I do with a cursed inheritance
what can I do when the ghosts stare at my soul
what can I do when they turn me inside out

I am failing my code
and my family too
I turning off with no feeling
but I have feelings for you
all these poem I write
are meant to be with joy
but turn to darkness
in hidden hues
I just want to live and repair
to not see the glitch in me
to not be the broken branch
I don't want to break
I never wanted to be the malfunction

I'm leaving the city
that buzzes with sound
I'm leaving the smoke
that seems to follow me around
I'm leaving the friends
who bullied me all my life
I'm leaving the haze
that wronged my judgement
I'm leaving my mind
the only way I can leave my past behind
I'm leaving my worries
it's the only way to escape
I'm leaving my fake smile
so I won't remember the pain
I'm leaving my hands tied
so I can't fight back
I'm leaving the city
so I can live and smell the air

for a fighting start
a bullet tearing me apart
and in my last breath I see a face
surrounded in wings and white shining light
A fighting chance is what waits
a fighting chance is what I'll have
I'm waiting and looking at the clock waiting
for a fighting start

I'll miss your smile that lit up the night
I'll miss your eyes they shine crystal Blue
I'll love you when your gone
I still love you now
even if our time is running out

Blowing in my hair
feeling heat left in my skin
feeling sweat beads fall
air in my face
a cooling breeze coming by
I heart with cool warmth
it is in the wind
and waiting for you
to embrace your meaning
and breath in air
take the air of life
and let in blow through your soul
the wind

I was gone in a day
I was gone in a way
I was gone in my mind
I was gone in my life
she was gone in a second
my heart was gone in a second
I was gone in a day
the pain will never go away

speaking without thought
losing my mind like I was taught
I was the teacher and I blocked it out
I was the student I lived in doubt
I rambled over and over with no prevail
evil will never fall with rambled thoughts
they own us all

a lowlife rascal
with nothing but swords
living off ***** words
hearing women whisper in my ears
feeling clothes fall off
and lust be strong
feeling adrenaline in my veins
and yet I will never be fulfilled
the person was gone years ago
and I still feel tears
they are gone a hole is in place
for all this hurt to fall into place
so let it be and let me fall
I will fall into deaths jaws

I take a breath and taste the air
I take a look I see your hair
I look down and see you bare
I think and I inhale a breath
time has slowed and my breath is shallow
I take a shaky breath and plunge
to a deal of love from within

Hazy thoughts embrace my brain
leaving me raddled and drained
all thoughts and power leaked down a drain
I can't think and I like it that way
all these thoughts of death go away
I don't care about life anymore
I just like the crystal water at the shore
the palms swinging in wind
and branches pulling and tugging
I think I'll go to the water and be in peace
maybe ecstasy was in my mind
shuddering of thoughts that I left behind
water is calm and kind
take me and leave this world behind

why do people only see a male
my body is not my ID
my body is not a stamp
I press my mind across
and I see a transformation
a female I see
through thick haze comes vision
a thought is not me
I'm not a gender ID

even through the wings of life and evil grows
even in life it will bide and it's power will grow
so grab my hand and squeeze it tight
don't let it go hold it with all your might
it won't be coming back anytime soon
Ill hold you and sing in lights tune
darkness is a shadow to light
with this power of lights might
let's stand and embrace and win the fight

lust is a broken loop in my heart I see her body and she takes that as all I see and maybe I concentrate and I notice it yes any person would and sometimes I imagine many things but that will never compare to you to my Angel in the sky that I cradle in soul and reap the darkness from them I will hold there burdens above mine and all I think about my life is how disgustingly ****** I am so I confide yes it's not healthy but it helps me keep my hands off her but sometimes I wish I could let loose but I can't so I tie a noose on my hands and string my self by it maybe my hands will bleed for what I've done I'll take the torture for everything I've done

through bright rays
comes light and yellow
and I see a colour beyond
it is filled with a bond
of pure regularity
and I see her standing in a glory
untamed natures and I am to witness
a growing of soul

it has cracks
and maybe you know
but do you see the scars
left by the cuts on my arms
do you see the marks on my heart
do you see the imminent failure
don't you see me
you say you don't care
but I feel your eyes
maybe I feel a tingling in my chest
but that's not love
that broke years ago
maybe I am healing
so maybe I'll stay
maybe for once I won't push away

all I know is my lies
all I know is my mask
all I know is a copy
all I know is a clone
all I know is hate
all I know is a fake
all I know is what I left behind
all I know is an angel is breaking me free
all I was a nobody
all I am is a shell
think I am a Angel and person filled with potential
and what do I think well I think I'm broken beyond repair
but there still trying to patch up the cracks
and I'm scared because it's working

beating in rhythm sweet harmony
in line of words that are all for you
I give my all angel all of me just for you
maybe I'm not the best and I know I'm a mess
but maybe all I need is you to reset
to break down my walls and let you in
to heal the cracks in my heart
to seal the hole that aches
to bring me happiness
and maybe your the one
maybe my soul is healing
maybe your eyes are all I need
to keep my world centred
maybe your heart is a melody I've been singing
maybe all I needed was you

in the dirt they roam
through dust and storms
they always grow
the dead will always roam
through the slopes
the devils will live
and my soul will be a house
let it all out and let them in
they only win if you let fear in

through death grows a bond of throes
and although no one can see me
I know nature is my guardian
maybe I was looking for safety
and maybe that was the groves

look to the ocean and breath
look at my heart and breath
look at my face and breath
look at my love and breath
look at your worries and let them breath
you will only rot if you don't breath
you'll disappear if you don't breath
so let it out and take in the air

in my heart I feel dread
maybe the darkness is not dead
but my soul is with him
in each step he takes
I feel it hum
but with a grip he holds it tight
maybe he did win the fight
maybe I lost the light
my love is gone
she was a rose and now there's only a thorn
a lone spike in the wind
maybe I will rebuild
the walls that came down
and maybe my Angel can wear a crown
a thorn for there hurt
maybe I'll lift them up and give them the sky
and maybe she will then learn to fly
through the lasting wisps
a angel will fly
as divine as I can see  
there heart a dark blue sea
full of love for me to keep
a think I hear a heart on repeat
what a rose so kind
that not even the devil can leave her behind

through wired chunks and smouldered trucks comes loads and loads of steam a in wired breed and self imprinted greed gas comes rising and it falls with grace but all these businesses are laced with fake faith a faith of change a faith of life but with a second it could end and who will be laughing then not me that's for sure because will be the one in heaven hurting from loss because I was one of the only people who knew what we could lose so let down the shields and come and bring me up and bring me from the grave maybe all I need was somebody to save me from the steam and gas maybe that was all I need a little faith inside this world of disgrace

through Angels wings
all the bright dangerous things
they cloud my mind and leave me helpless
so come and takes this grief away
take it and put it away
put it in the attic
and attack it with love
maybe the darkness was all it had
and maybe my soul was in there too
hopefully it will grow back
and I'll be one again
but till then...
I think I'll try to breath again
to taste the air
and see the sky
and maybe just maybe the darkness will die

soft tones in rightful throes
through hero's tough
and rightness goes
the evil will be ******* from here it grows
the tide will turn
the wind will blow
and here I will be broken from head to toe