Gettin really tired of being stabbed in the back so often and wiping your spit off my face

"911 what's your emergency"

I can control my demon now

"Excuse me?"

I can make the mask materialize and show you

"And you thought you genuinely made her happy"
*heart chips and piece breaks off

His mask started to crumble and turn to dust as his heart began to fill the hole in his chest.
His gloomy eyes were revealed and stared off into the distance as the last bit of his mask crumbled away.
He falls to the floor, exhausted from his journey

I'm a stranger to myself

**** I think it is a demon, I'm getting nauseous and my head is starting to spin. I started hearing the voice while I was gathering energy for a little to stay awake.

I wonder if you're scared that I won't ever leave her if I get together with her.
I wonder if you're worried that she'll steal me away and I'll pick her over you

My my, someone was a little hasty

My mood is at absolute zero right now

People told me that I was going through so much hurt when I cut myself and was suicidal because God has extremely good days for me in store. I wonder if you're that something that will bring those days. I wonder if you're what will bring those days.

Sometimes I wonder what I should do. I'm laying here feeling empty, alone, and dead inside

I'm envious of you two.

You both look so happy, truly in love.
You had to wait until he broke up with her and he finally did. Now you two are together, looking happier than ever.
You're being silly and goofy together, you laying on her lap.
You guys truly look happy.
You love her
And she loves you
I'm truly envious of you two

"If this is love I don't want it, please just take it from me."
"Why does it hurt so much?"

I'm laying down listening to music letting all the sadness flow out of my eyes and heart....

I wonder if ya still think its a good idea to be with him. Either way you're stuck with him wether ya like it or not for now.

I wonder if you wish it was me instead of him.

I wonder if ya wish I wanted to still date you instead of another girl.

I wonder if ya regret lettin me go

You've never seen me with another girl have you? You've never seen me smile and talk with any other girl but you. You've never heard me talk about how cute another girl is. You've never seen me have an interest for another girl. I saw you looking at me while I was with her, I wonder what you thought

drip drip
It falls to the floor
drip drip
The vulnerability that comes with opening the door
drip drip
Should it be sealed again
drip drip
Maybe

"Hey!?"
..!...
"Quit spacing out"
shakes blood from blade"

"911 what's your emergency?"

My parents are yelling at eachother again and it's making me love her more.

"Umm sir, what exactly is the nature of your emergency?"

I love her and I want her to be with her right now

"Sir you've called this line 3 times today, do you actually have an emergency?"

Yes. I don't want her to have anymore nightmares. I need to kiss her now and make her forget about the blood.

"Sir please stop calling this line"

You're gonna know the pain I went through now.....watching me want to talk to and be around another girl....I hope it doesn't hurt too much even though I know it will.....

"All I can feel is sadness flowing from his blade"

Sext: listen to our song and feel your heart crumble in your chest

I promise to love you unconditionally and wholly, in sickness and in health, in poverty and in wealth and to inspire you to be a better person in a little way each day and always respect and listen to what you have to say.
I promise to stay at your side, for better or for worse, to never leave you because you are a blessing and not a curse. To support your dreams and thoughts, and to cry with and hold you during our roughest spots.
Today I take you to be my wife, for you I would gladly give up my life.
I take this ring as a reminder for our lasting commitment to one another. I take this ring as a symbol to stay loyal to each other.
I have only but a single life, and I now pledge it to you my one and only wife.

5 minutes after would have been fine....
10 after would have been too.....
It's been an hour.....where are you?

It's been four years since I last wrote anything here; reading my past stuff makes me squirm a little at how dramatic I was back then but I guess I haven't changed as much as I would like to believe. I'm not really sure what I want this account to be now; before it was obvious that it was just an outlet to let my negative emotions out but I'm past that part in my life, I think? I guess I just want to say what I feel and not worry about how it will change how people see me.
That already sounds pretty shallow though doesn't it? I think so, but I don't want to trouble anyone or make them feel bad for me. Its strange that after all this time of feeling at least okay to really good, I'm starting to feel sad again; I wonder why that is? I guess it's because I feel like no one cares about me as much as I care about them. It's hard to believe someone when they say they care about you and then when you try to reach out you don't hear back from them. I get that everyone is busy, I'm pretty busy too, but you don't have enough time to spare a few seconds to reply?
That's where the problem comes in you see? I can't tell anyone that because all it will do is make them feel bad and create a fake version of what I'm looking for. I guess what I really want is for someone to genuinely care enough to just take the 5 seconds to say something back, I already did the hard part by saying something first right?