I never used them
Love, Darling, Sweetheart
Perhaps because they mean too much
And I'm afraid to mean so much
Afraid to love someone that much

But wouldn't it be so nice?

All I want to do
Is drink you all away
These feelings that I prayed for
They came too ******* late
Now you're gone and all that I long for

Aphrodite, you're too cruel
Like a genie
You always give me what I wish for
With a cost too much to pay

Apathy and loss
Then loss and longing?
It's a sick game you love to play

And I play it everytime
Failing the same level over and over

Hoping one day I'll be the winner

I was in a drought of words
They wouldn't flow like magic
Like they always did for you
I thought I felt so **** much
Yet I couldn't write a thing

And here you are,
A flood of words
An avalanche of feeling
And once they start to sprinkle
I'm left in a downpour

I'm delusional, that must be it
Because I still think we are soulmates
When we were hardly even dreams

I'm tired of walking these parallel lines with you
Wondering if they'll ever cross again
I'm tired of moving on
Just to be drawn right back in
How is it fair
That I am doomed to fall for you
In a perpetual loop
A cycle that never ends
Why are you some labyrinth I can't escape?
I'm tired of loving you and losing you
But never really having you to begin

But gods, it really is just your voice
One phone call and the cycle starts again

I'd love to fully move on to someone new
But it always leads back to you
To what I wish we were
And what we never were
All the fear I felt for you
All the love you never returned
It seeps out around me
Like an aura
I can't untangle us from me

You're still like drugs to me
I think I'm sober
Then I hear your voice again
A hit and I'm hooked
A hit and I need another
And another and another
You're an addiction
That I can't get clean from
No matter how many times
I wash my hand of you
Something always lingers