When i think of you i think of death
A tasteless, neutral more than god
An easy one

When i think of you i think of death i think of mother
The last time i saw her eyes
They were fading like sharpie on my hands
They sounded like a cave, like leftovers

I do not think i could love anymore
When i think of that i think of a river or a sea
The beds and my body, the beds and my body
A casablanca, a jasmine, i wonder if the window would be high enough--
When i think of that i remember, charlie
Don't jump

Hometown, how i wish i don't belong
The towns where they don't know my name
The town that has known me for years
Yet i barely know her
It was me who decided to go home
Yet how i wish i don't belong
How i wish i was that strong

"Hey, stop it.
You are romanticizing."

Don't ******* tell me to stop
Don't ******* tell me to stop what i don't even started

1/
I once had hands like ******* and
when i touched your cheeks you became
bathroom floor.
I didn't tell father i am keeping the

bathroom *****, but i wouldn't let anyone
clean it.
My roommate is sleeping like a pig; i think
i, too, am becoming a higher being.

2/
Back to where it started
It started in somewhere like this;
the very beginning of despair
and all the dark agony
clouding your entire soul ---
it appears on your
skin so do not hide!
Do not hide
for you are so clear yet the world
is too blind

You saw me and you knew i was just a little bit sleepy but why did you burn the incense and cried in front of me?

[I wasn't dead... yet]

You begged and begged so i would make it easier for you but you did not know i am god and immortal and i know everything right and wrong, so

what if i chose the latter?

----

[I didn't, though.]

They won't understand
and i'd be okay with that.
Just a bit lonely.

When i hide, you go
Seek. Why can't you understand,
As simple as that?

i run
lose my legs
i run
what is pain? she runs
loses her legs
i tell you mother
a story and a marathon race
i tell you mother
a garden and a chest
i tell you, i tell you
as you appear in nightmares
as you
as you

and i do not exist anymore
and i run and i lose my legs
so i tell you mother
from the beginning to the end
i tell you
i tell you

i tell you

1/

That thumb, much uglier than other thumbs, is purple and dull. It reminds me of your mother's right arm. Young and bruised. Your father really liked her skin that way.

At night, they had *** like there would be no other day. Your father rough like a rock and your mother weak like an ant. It was more like marital ****. One thing they discussed in a healthy way; they hid future in a grey safety box to forget the passcode.

When they were trying to **** each other you only could grow and grow.

You are a tree living in a big city. You have no friend to talk to and your brother begins to think that you were born silent. With so much happening inside my root? i heard you breathed. I hear you breathe. I hear you breathe. Please stop.

Or don't. If you stop, i die. If i die, you stop. Or we could become a bird and live near a steel factory. There are so much different ways to die. Why would we choose one?

You wanted to choose three. It was raining hard and you wanted to choose three.

You told me before. You had older brother like skyscraper. Another like asphalt. They did not live at a same place, but soon, they would eat the great wall and become a white china vase. Jesus would break them and mary would not find out. Joseph would have had killed her before.

2/

Hey, i think i know adam. I think he was fishing and drinking from the toilet bowl while the teacher was explaining how babies are delivered. You could not help but imagine your skin down there being cut. Like a film. First take.

You had no action. You were a bark, poor and dead. No one loved you until you pretend you are god.

Actually you are. God.

Actually they do not love you, god. Actually they are afraid of you, god. They think you care about them, god.

3/

Oh god. You don't, do you?

You don't, do you?