every poem is the last
even this

there’s a spring in my step that’s been missing
I open my mouth and a bunch of excited chatter pours out
procrastination hasn’t been a problem
things are getting done
I feel randomly happy and bright…

I think
it’s hope

my dog sniffs me frantically
where have you been?
is there food that I missed?
there are smells I do not recognize
were there other dogs?
I do not smell other dogs
does this mean anything for me?
I do not think this means anything for me
but I must go outside Now
and *** everywhere
let me out
Now

everything is wonderful with my world
and I am happy
happy happy
it’s a beautiful evening and I love my house
my street
my job
I am lucky lucky
lucky
the breeze tells me so
in the impenetrably delicate language of chaos theory
and the setting sun
is just a setting sun
no matter how many tales it spins
into electromagnetic currents around the earth
things spin
we spin
I spin
and fall down laughing

I hate self fulfilling prophecies
because of the free will oxymoron

she’s so dumb
I don’t know why she bothers me so much
doesn’t even know
it’s not one “piece”
for crying out loud
you even called them notes
thank you, by the way
for the note(s)
still, she’s so dumb

that’s never going to happen
this is just
a Lesson
I hear life is full of them
(shrugs dubiously)

it all just slips through your fingers
which is fine if you’re tired of holding things
like I was

I forgive you darling
you only need to forgive yourself
and let lovers love
it’s true
only selves can blame selves
I love your God if it has taught you this
I am happy for your good fortune
I will still fantasize about you
though not in high heels

I love my new watch
love love love it
“Let’s get moving!” it says
yes, I think, yes watch,
let’s!

When he was little he always told the truth
He didn’t even know it was an option not to
His word was gold
Now
Did you take all the treats? (Lie)
Did you do your work? (Lie)
Did you pick up? (Lie)
Did you quit stalking that poor woman?

life is madness
and I am full
of life

I forgot how it doesn’t matter what I want
I feel better now that I remember

the rabbit hole is deep and has many warrens
one could spend a lifetime exploring
which is what I’m doing
but you will still only experience a tiny fraction
good thing we get so many

I see the light again...
it’s mine

my body aches
come press yourself to me
all our pains will dissolve
like magic
open your heart and mind
let my endless love absolve the misery
we can rest now
in the quiet gentle stillness
of us

pain is nothing to me
I have no aversion to sacrifice
obsession, a peculiarity
my wants are secondary
action rules the day
and I don’t want to make a mistake
the consequences always feel so ominous
especially in matters of the heart
we are imperfect, absurd creatures
who should not be trusted

so I do nothing
maybe this is like you

I need a back rub
and a hand holding
and a tummy to kiss
and some other stuff

a little hug to start the day
to keep the blues away
to tell the happy, stay

I wish I was a tiny being
who lived in tiny trees
admiring tiny blooms
floating on a micro breeze

I wish I had tiny problems
like finding a bit of light
to lay my tiny head
among the lovely bryophyte

don’t lay around waiting for the vultures
they’re not coming

I would have happily stayed in
with my tea
and your chips
watching the latest episode of our thing
falling asleep
in the dwindling electronic light
one of us dragging the other to bed

I would have happily done that
instead

I don’t know where he is
or what he’s doing
or who he’s with
I don’t know anything
I’m just
alone

I am a lonely watering can hanging in a dark shed
I have a flower pattern outside
and cobwebs inside

I couldn’t even talk to him at the end
my brain frozen in fog
couldn’t look at him
or myself
now we just look away
it’s fine

I want to tug your head back by the hair
touch you, slowly, everywhere
kiss your lovely patient face
find every sensitive ticklish place
fill you with anticipation and joy
become your favorite vice and toy
I want to live inside your gentle arms
surprise you daily with sneaky charms
be your love, your passion, your girl
dance innocently with you forever
our hearts will sway and shake and twirl

I want
to care
but the question is unfair
from one has never
touched my hair
or left his lair
or returned, in person
my loving stare

pretty present wrapped in bows
tingles of excitement down through my toes
it’s my birthday soon

I’m under the sun’s sweltering microscope
a single bead of sweat slips between my *******
the wind intervenes on my behalf  
swaying with my pretty dress
I appreciate the cherry red vintage firebird to my left
the enormous bursting Christmas white hydrangeas to my right
it’s a short walk
past stately buildings and old trees
people scattered on benches and lawns
or meandering past with their own brown bags
it’s a beautiful day
in my sleepy capital

let’s go together
you go your way
and I’ll go mine

will he leave?
yes, of course
that’s inevitable
when?
I don’t know
but I’m sure it makes no difference
to a guy in Germany
with a passionate Italian admirer

my fantasy won a marathon
but then passed out at the finish line
when my reality finally caught up
it quickly went to work administering cpr
they are now snuggling together by a cozy fire
both having lost the competitive drive

I was marooned in time
along an archipelago of moments
it was paradise

but a hurricane blew me into the present
now I have no idea where I am

black, white, mud, and
the properties of light
create a reality
that becomes something different
on each side
of the lenses in my eyes

humanity is making its way
doggedly
up the ***** of Maslow’s hierarchy

maybe
will only get you so far
but most of the world’s population has not realized this
as they bow their heads in prayer

I remember once you joked I was bipolar
And I was like, hmmm maybe you’re right
And you said, no no no, I’m just joking,
you’re not

Now I know, really, I’m not
I have chemical proof
But
Something is not right
I’m not sure but
I think something
is just not right

I hid all my scary thoughts under the porch
so you would not think my house is haunted
or an attraction for coarse beasts

I nearly cried today
a few tears dripped out
I was really looking forward to it
didn’t happen though
maybe next time

when I am dead
I will not haunt you
or protect you
I will not hang around at all
not Earth, and not “heaven”
I will go home
I might pass through the sun
and the galactic core
I might make a few stops
if possible
but then I will pass through
the wheel
into the timeless infinity
outside all the universes
for just a little while
I will rest, be, and do research
but I will come back here
some other time
when I come up with more plans
maybe we can meet up then

...
(looks around)
...
(stares at sky)
...
(starts to whistle)

what happened to your gentle love
what happened to her innocence
you see the faces
meant for you

what a fabulous day
a shiny, rare, legendary kind of day
with very high CP and a 3 star assessment
a day for golden razz berries and hatching eggs
hope you have a happy pokeday

I am just a meme that went viral
for too long

I have no imagination
only the vivid brush of memory

Mercury is in Aquarius
just so you know
it does not bode well, for people like me
AND it goes retrograde later this month
then Venus... jeez don’t get me started
I may not pull through

the mesosphere, it seems, is a mystery
and it’s been right there beneath our noses
well, the noses of our satellites at least
the poor mesosphere
the middle child of atmospheric investigation
it’s not that we don’t care, middle child
we really really do
it’s just, you’re so **** hard to read!
I wonder what the corresponding metaphoric mental state is
could there be a layer of my consciousness
hiding there in plain site
and I just don’t have the technical expertise to probe it?
I bet there is
I bet it’s where the aliens are

Live in the looping moment of balance!

                                Share the bliss of fingertips!

           Open hidden passages!

                                                      ­  Bring love!

the wobble of a muon foretells a paradigmatic shift in our understanding of the forces of nature

my wobble foretells an excess of alcohol