I LIKE TO SAY YOUR NAME

I like to say
your name

when you're
not here

turn you
into sound

conjure you out of
thin air

so that you appear
before me

dressed in sound
only

memory sketching in
the rest of you

as if sound
was just an outline

and love
colours you in

adding the voice last
so I can hear you say.

"Hello you..!"
and there you are

as present
as present

can be.

I like to say
your name

when you're
not there.

In the darkness there is a light that shines
   And touches us
In our weakest moments there is a strength
    That lifts us
We close our eyes and we know
     We are not alone
There is a spirit within us
       Whispering
A language that is not our own
       Yet we understand
We feel its devine power filling us
       Embracing us
Comforting even our deepest wounds

It is in these moments.   In our hour of
       greatest need
When we see the second set of footprints
       In the sand

The poet lives two lives.
One on the outside,
And one in their mind.

When you look in their eyes
You could see an abyss.

If you looked long enough
You could sink into it.

But most people don’t see it.

Take the time to read the words, though,
And you would know for sure.

The poet lives in two different worlds.

one second everything was perfect
and then the next it feels like we’re drowning

suffocating under the stomach of a whale
and frantically weaving through the teeth of a shark
and feeling the kelp entangle on your arms
and the faults burn you up
and your feet sink towards the mud at the bottom
your tears just dissolve into the ocean
almost as if you never cried
but you can still feel it in the back of your throat
all as you watch the light over you become less and less visible
and your lungs compress
and finally you lie still at the bottom mustering the strength to rise again

you’re drowning to death
but you’ll never exactly die
and that’s the most painful part

If my fate is to love you
From a distance
Then I'll burn for you
Like a star in your night sky
Bright, steady, reliable
Unwavering
Until the end of time.