you slipped away from me and I couldn't control that. my whole life has been a ******* mess since and I can't seem to go back to being normal.
But was my life before really normal?
having to deal with the lack of appreciation and the constant degrading was hurtful, but I did it because I loved you, I thought that you were going through a phase and you were just going to come out of it.
So maybe life wasn't normal before...maybe I have to go through this now so I can have a better outcome in the future, maybe I had to deal with the downgrades so I can have a lot more upgrades.
I'm trying so hard to live my life.
Everyday a new obstacle places itself in my path and I always get stuck. I always tell myself that god has a plan for me...but lately i'm not so sure...Do you think that I want to live this way? knowing that you could possibly re-enter my life at any second. I'm not scared of you, I'm scared about the person I'm going to become when you're here.
So please don't come back.
I sometimes find myself wondering what my life would be like if I hadn't met you. Would I be the person I am now? Would I have more freedom? Would I have less freedom? Would I be happier? Would I be sadder? I tend to think that we are put in certain situations to test our strength and our abilities to either move on or give up, BUT now I'm not so sure... Are we being tested? Are we being watched? Are our lives being planned out as we speak? So many questions and very little answers. Maybe we are supposed to live the pros and cons of life but maybe I'm just over thinking.
— The End —