I forgot my first love,
I let myself get caught up in all the trivial things,
the pluses and minuses we track,
even though they aren't fulfilling.  
I apologize, Mi Amor,
I know its been just me and you since the beginning.
Sometimes you don't rhyme,
you just flow,
The leaky faucet of my mind
                                             drips
                                               drips
                                                 drips.....
          Poetry you complete like no human ever could...

Your eyes cut through my soul,
Like a siren's song to sailor.
And she got her sailor,
But even that didn't sedate her.
How could anything be better than those eyes?
Could I see the world in those eyes?
Every last corner and crack,
Or was that just a misperception?
Could I really state into those eyes forever,
Or would reality seep through?
I want to live in this fantasy
It's real to me
So, is that enough?
Can those captivating eyes become my paradise?
One time, I thought, maybe
Maybe I could forget the crazies inside me.
Pipe dreams can't be achieved,
Not for "regular" people
Those eyes will eventually fade,
the best things always do,
And then what will I do?

Hush,
now fold into my arms like a paper boat
and I'll go floating down your rivers.
Hush,
Inhale with a whisper that will tug me
where your love beats,
the place where we'll meet.
Fill me up with winter,
you can swallow me.
Twined between your heartstrings,
I am smoldering.
Close your eyes now sweets,
Come on, melt for me.
Mold into my shape like wax,
I'll Light your candle wick,
I will ignite all your tips
and watch you burn for me.
I will watch you breath.
.
.
  .
    Hush, exhale-

What I've always wanted
I realize
Is for someone to see
the world through my eyes

Though no one ever will,
I fear my mistakes and misdemeanors
seem unclear
to all but myself



In solitude i find my own place
to go when i fall from grace
.
.
  .
    time and time again

And from my closet i pull a mask
the performance begins!
as i do every menial task
to appear as they expect

And even in a different place
unknown eyes watch
and present every case
for unwarranted scrutiny



and then the people i thought would stay
the mistakes i made
oh,for those i did pay
.
.
  .
    dearly


Apologies seem to fall flat
as the multitude of roads I chose
that seem to be recurring

So see the world through my eyes
i beg of you
please recognize
the efforts of my newborn self
put past memories
on a shelf and let me start anew

It’s strange to be a stranger to you
Even though years have passed,
I hope you think of me
And how we made it last.

Your golden curls and goofy smile,
Burned inside my memory
School yard parks late at night,
The way you made me smile,
Oh so bright.

I wonder what you are doing now,
I hope you are happy and not alone.
I hope you found laughter
And a love that healed and was strongly grown.

Do you remember how we told each other everything,
How proud I was of the silly twisted bracelet ring?

Are you still Afraid if lady bugs,
The way they fly, they way they crawl?
Do you still give the world's warmest hugs,
Is Elmo is the best above all?

I grew up loving you,
So I beginning to accept that will never change,
But the fact that I don't know you any more,
will always be forever strange....

Against the blackness of early morning
my reflection in the glass door
is multiplied, an optical delusion.  Two
of me returns my gaze.  Which is me?
I overlap myself.

My hope for this new day is an awareness
of a sacred singularity that celebrates
difference, yet joins all things, all beings,
in the reality of The One.

I hope for faith grounded in wisdom,
trust and kindness...harmony of thought
and will as the result of the peaceful union
of divergent voices...and peace replacing
the taste of greed and violence in our
mouths.

Faint light peeks shyly around the partially
drawn curtain.  Morning is not far behind.
Slowly she moves across the garden,
climbs deep green vines clinging to the
stone wall, then casts her smile on two
sparrows as they toss fresh water into
the air from the shallow birdbath.

Early morning's somber light suddenly
bursts golden as the sun makes clear
the arrival of day, erasing all reflected
delusions.

I am one with One.

I found peace in your eyes and calmness in your embrace, like my favorite story being read over and over.
I can still feel your hands in my hair.
I retrace every centimeter where you touched me
And find my self gasping for air.
Your smile has infected me,
My words get jumbled, my thoughts spill out into silence.

So I let my body do the talking,
Pulling him closely I run my fingers through his hair,
With each kiss I find my self wanting more and more,
I can’t control myself,
I lean in and give into my desire.

Morning comes much too soon,
Oh my red one, how you set my soul on fire.