People take great risk
for understanding
but when asked
to understand
they refuse with haste
what a waste
for if we risk
to understand
we bring understanding in our wake

Real tears
what are they?
pain boiled inside out
bottled together waiting
pressure building
held inside till the time is wrong
then released

real tears
do not come cheap
they come with weakness
with giving up
with lies
with scars

real tears
mean you've lost the game
your done surviving

real tears
I refuse to shed ever
especially not for you

I WILL NOT CRY FOR YOU!
*sobs

My friend told me to believe
or i would witness the end
why would you want to miss the end of the world?
Imagine the beauty of the flames
raging in tremendous harmony.
The icy cold wind blowing down
demon after demon,
water rising, taking shape,
charging forth to meet the nightmare in front,
who's features are distorted by
the blazing inferno dancing crudely around the darkness in the center.
Why should I miss such glory?
A poet would cry tears of joy at the sight, soaking in the awesome spectacle.
even at the door of death

I'm so tired of the insults
the hints too...
coming from the ones,
I want to believe in me
I wanna make proud

I'm so tired of being called stupid
called an idoit
told I'm a b**
ugly...

I'm tired of loving
people who insult my pride
but can't stop caring
can't stop thinking
my problems are small
theirs are bigger
I can hold this in
its my job.
no crying allowed ever
not even alone
but...

every word sets a scar a new
upon a broken heart
every teardrop from their eyes
kills me softly
every drop of blood from the smallest of wounds
destroys me

I keep trying to take everything
the pain
the sorrow
and leave only happiness
it burdens me so...
but for some reason
I love it
maybe because its grown on me.
and its fond of me now...
it does the one thing I've always wanted
it doesn't let me go without throwing a
prideful glance
my way.

You are angry
and I understand why.
you lost your love
again.
plenty of other fishes
but their all so different from him
and while I lost my forth shot at a father
I can tell your pains worse
so I'll stay silent
and write alone.

your saddened
and I understand why
you lost your shot too
but you got along so great
and he always said how much you were like him
But your problems are bigger
so I'll stay within my mind
and write the pain away

you have your own problems
and I'll support you
deal with your outbursts of anger and regret
and take all of it
I'll let you yell
I hope you yell at me
don't keep it bottled within your soul
let it go
and I'll take it gladly
if it means you'll smile
a real smile again

My heartbeat is faint
I can't compete
all these voices make it so hard to forget about them
I'm choking on my own kindness

my fears
my tears
are always overpowered by yours

insults you throw


Why do you always insult me?
never anyone else?
I want to cry every time
your my family
your a adult
a parent
airhead
blonde
stupid
you don't even know what your doing
neither do the others
but it still hurts

it's not just you anymore
it now bonces around inside my head
beating me down
it's all in good fun
I know but it still hurts