Ok so to you
I may not
Ever be gud enuff
Fakt is
I see my greatness
And that
Iz far betta than
Your perception of good
Because I'm learning
I Matter
More than what
Anyone, yes even you should!!!

Sabotaging myself
Way more than I should
Chasing away
Any and everyone I could
Petrified of
Constantly getting hurt
Painfully lyvyng in isolationismz
Unfortunately is all my heart
Has ever known...

Felt like damaged goods
My entire life
Tumultuous existence
Since childhood
Brokenness led to
Not knowing how to make
A grown-up choice
Second and third-party
Guessing myself
Being told I don't know
How to live my own life well
Duality in my unworthy
Unwholly spiritual zoulrelm
Has made some of living
This only one life
I 've been lyvyng
One heck of an internal Hell!!!

Who can I be
When told for soooo long
That who I am is not right
What makes my life soooo wrong
Who else can tell my story
Tell my tales
Sing my zoulrelm heart'z songz?
If truly loving me
Is to know me
When did we meet again?
I'm having trouble
Thinking about the time
You didn't even care to take
To try to figure me out
But according to you
You love  Me, this stranger
I am to me most days
Beyond the shadows
Of your own doubtz...

Don't feel
Deserving of any love
Or anyone to love me
Not even from
An invisible all loving
All knowing God
So I turn my beauty off
So no man can find me attractive
To not get or be confused
Equating *** with caring
Or genuine loving affections
Hiding far behind
The wall of a natural RBF
They claim is almost as ****
As my smile
It's so sad, I can't even see
The me in the mirror
They speak of
All I been looking at me for
My whole life
Is a drop of meaningful  love...

No weapons of destruction
No full armor donned
No lyrics to sing or talk
My way out this hurtful harm
Breaking superficial surfaces
Building potential
With my barely bare hands
Screaming from within
Dis eased mentally
Fighting to survive
The best and worst
Parts of me
So you think
I think my **** don't stink
You want to judge me
You have no clue
That the same God in you
Is the same God in me...