Angels possess me.
Demons ****** me.
An' what's even worse,
Is it just might be,
Visa verse.

The past haunts me.
The future daunts me.
I guess, in the present tense,
I'm just too hesitant.

The T.V. News don't really tell me much,
In half a breath.
But it still scares me nearly half to death.
It just might be an' overreaction,
Of my big imagination.
I guess I read too much between the lines,
Just puttin' too many thoughts,
In other people's minds.

I see visions of Glory tell.
An' I see visions of gory Hell.
I see black.
I see white.
But what scares me most,
Is what I see at night.
I dream of wonderful things.
But some of my nightmares,
Would make you scream.
I listen to the silence,
An' try not to hear the violence,
Goin' on all around me.
The dead aren't always buried underground,
You see.

We walked along the shore
She and I
Talking and laughing
Saying words that meant something
Something more
We shared emotions
Feelings
Thoughts that carried us further along
It was a beautiful day
Sun was shining
Gentle breeze
The smell of the ocean
Bare feet leaving a trail
Finding beautiful shells along the way
Everything was wonderful
Amazingly so
And then I did something
Something stupid
Foolish
I hurt her feelings
Clouds came in
Her sea raged
Storm clouds brewed
I was in the middle of her tempest
Told to be quiet and wait it out
It is not something I do well
Not at all
I walked into her sea and raged at her nature
Expecting respect
Getting none
Only more rage
A tsunami of anger
Raised up before me
I both stood my ground and asked for forgiveness
I have my own nature
But it is too late
The sea took her back
All I have are left are memories
Fading footprints in the sand
And heartache
She was beautiful to behold
She was more than a friend
More that I could ever have dreamed of
Now she is no more
I’ll stand on the shore and remember her
A little while longer
See if the tides bring her back
But it gets chilly here at night
Cold and lonely
And it looks likely that she will never return
Hands in my pockets I dream of what might have been
And cry
Tears littering the sand
She was too much for me to hold
I have to let her free
She is a force of nature that cannot be confined
The sad truth
I love her still
Always
The walk back to the road will take forever
The dunes are high and I am weary
No other way
One foot in front of the other
Good bye my love
I cannot stay any longer
Or the pain of knowing you will carry me out to sea
On the cliff
I take one last look
Moon shining on the waves
Say a prayer for dead loves
Walking down the road
Trying to forget
How much I hurt
Maybe tomorrow
Not likely
But I have hope
Now even more
Because I have felt love stronger
Stronger than ever before
Both ruined and reborn
Good bye my love

My heart was
Addicted to you
You were my
Drug of choice
But my head told me
You were
An illusion
Not a real thing
I absently minded
Rub the scars
You left
On my heart
Feeling again
How much they hurt
Remembering
How they got there
How you carved your words
Through
The bark of my heart
Into the living part of me
I have to believe
You were
A phantom lover
To believe you were
Real
Would hurt
So much more
My heart is addicted to you
I have to quit you
Wondering if
I ever will
Need a 12 step program
For lost loves
Admitting I have
No control over
Loving you
Knowing
I can never have you again
It was too good
Not to hurt

Cupid's bow twangs,
Broken arrows,
On my heart.
Lovely little sparrows,
Ripped apart.

I am dying.
But have no fear.
I am crying.
But shed not a tear.
I am trying.
But it's not too clear.
I am lying.
When I look in the mirror.

Death rides my soul.
Look into my eyes,
See an empty whole.
See the pain,
The fear,
The anger,
The hate.
See the strain,
From having to wait.

I deny love.
Keep it locked inside.
I defy love.
Feelings to hide.

Buried deep,
Within my being,
Notice the turmoil,
The blind are seeing.
Listen to the screams,
The deaf are hearing.
Feel the heat,
And the cold is searing.

Deep within me,
A fire burns,
Hot an' bright.
But I'm so cold,
In the midst of the night.
I breath.
So I must be alive.
But baby,
I need a breath of life.
Heal my wounds.
Pull out the knife.

I deny love.
Keep it locked inside.
I defy love.
Feelings to hide.

Tears bleed through eyes clenched shut.
Face frozen in quiet anguish but
Shower washing away tears, not the shame.
The one you loved is the one to blame.

Memories flooding back to haunt again.
Tears don't stop falling down the drain.
Heart broken, one more time.
Still here, at the scene of the crime.

Hurt for years, feel the pain today.
All at once, a debt I have to pay.
No where to hide from internal agony.
No where to go but inside of me.

Face the day as best I can.
Plastic smile hides nothing.
My eyes tell the truth, if you dare to see.
The pain buried deep inside of me.