I am back where I've been running from
A willow tree claws at the sky overhead
Its gnarled golden branches shedding delicate, black leaves
like the tears I have not, cannot cry
I watch a leaf spiral down in front of me
a mix of dread and euphoria climbing through my toes to the top of my head
the leaf dive bombs toward me
landing programmed-perfect on my wrist
A boy's voice comes from right behind my shoulder
Keep it
I startle, but he is holding onto me
He holds the leaf to my wrist
it is like
Needles, they draw the leaf's veins over top my own
Until all that is left is his brand on my raw skin
All yours now, sweetheart
His laugh a puncture wound to my heart
Something about the air between us changes though
He wraps his arms around me, and I didn't realize how empty I'd been before he had
You could stay he offers
Now in earnest, not messing with my head any longer
I taste your pain. It's only getting stronger he says
Let me help. I would make it easy for you.
My world is beautiful, nothing like the way your mortal eyes see it. he explains
It is music you can't describe, it is warmth, it is light. You will never need, never hurt for anything again here. I will pull you out of the darkness. I will heal your soul one final time. Just let me help you.
Death cups my chin and draws my eyes to his
And for once, there is no terror in falling to his abyss
bliss
I pull myself away
I can't I remind him gently
There is beauty in mortality too that I must see before I see your world. I know that I have love, a future to follow. Life comes at the cost of pain, but I have to accept that for all else it has to offer.
I'm sorry I cry for Death only, that I must turn him down
I close my eyes to shut out the pain
And suddenly he is gone
I am back in my bedroom
I realize then my escape
How lucky I am, that I must run faster...
But some part of me still begs to go back to him
I take my own needle
Trace the outline of his brand on my wrist
and for a moment, I feel his arms around me again
For a moment in life, Death lets me feel free