Notepad

Notepad 7h

how easy it was to walk away
turn quiet and never stay
so you think you're not to blame
and left my heart in vain
when your voice was my song
your smile that kept me moving on
but here I lay
thinking the ghost of you to stay
embracing my blue soul with a cold kiss
and tell me that we'll be okay

when my soul misses you, my eyes looking for you, that just means that I love you. I just don't know why my love passes through you and never touched your heart.

#depression

Notepad Apr 18

Away

I told you who I see,
Because im done blaming me,
And you choose to walk away,
Didn't even tried to stay,
Easy to brush away,
Cause you dont care anyway...

You showed me how much you treated me badly and I pretended that im okay so you wouldnt hurt yourself. I believe that there is good in you always, that's why I stayed and hoped we could make it. But you gave me no signal, no response, no story. What am I to do? When I did the best of me for you? Making me feel like I haven't done so much in trying, in hoping that everything is going to be okay. But this isn't okay, how much pain I embraced from your absence, silence, recklessness, hopelessness and to make me feel like I'm not being enough for you. Why do I despair now? I don't know anymore...

#depression #broken #lettinggo

Notepad Apr 12

Odd

It makes sense
To be different
Its feels better to be odd

3 - 5 - 7
Being odd makes us seen better of our true selves, stay unique as you are

Notepad Apr 12

If only...

If only you knew
What my mind would do to me
All the pain I hold inside of me
The things I pretended to be happy
So I wouldn't let you worry

If only I knew
how to fix myself
I'd be somebody else
Someone you'll remember
Someone you'll care for
But I need help
And all I have is myself

My big depression is back again for this autumn season

Notepad Apr 2

Low

You got what you need
Not knowing the cost is me
But gave my soul peace

#low #moments #sad #times

Notepad Feb 12

Peel

Every broken word
Peeling my heart like onions
Till my eyes swollen
My lungs dry to inhale dust
Immune enough to feel pain

Notepad Feb 8

Soft

In every word
I had faith
And enough patience
To move forward
To keep smiling
And be okay
But a lie
Shown me truth
In the silence
Cutting me deep
Down the bone
And still say
"I'll be okay."
That's just me
Kind for hearts
Accepting it all
No matter what
Leave or stay
I hold nothing
But painful memories
And beautiful mementos

I'm not perfect
But too soft