it will be engraved
in my brain,

like the tracks
on the train,

and they’ll call
me insane

but at least I’ll exist without the pain,

in my veins.

I’ll restrain,
I’ll maintain,
I’ll regain.

Sometimes I feel like an alien even when on my own planet.
Sometimes I feel like an alien even when in my own mind.

I am rejected, and dissected,

And left empty

But only by myself,
A hole I dug

In my heart.

Do you know my name?
Or are those just words you call me?

Do I know my name?
Or am I just another version of what we all could be?

Broken down, left skin and bone

Aren’t we all the same? Don't you too, bleed gold?

There is not much in this world I need

Just food, water, and some air to breathe.


And yet it seems in the end, I still find me gasping for breath

Thirsting and starving, forever just a fading silhouette.

you are the fire
burning in my heart

and on a lonely winter night
there is only desire

a candle bleeds wax
as you watch.

it drips, drips down
like the frost on your heated windows.

can you see my face as you look in a little closer

feel my rosy-cheeks
they are not red in heat

do you know of desire?

tell me about the fire.

How strange
Is the Autumn rain

As it all falls down
In October

two faces, two egos
to my face you tell me everything is fine
for every flaw i perform, for every mistake
and yet, you spit venom behind my back on my name

how funny, am i right?

all of which I hate;

I hate the sound of winter coats against the wind.

I hate the feeling of sap rubbing against my finger tips.

I hate hands holding onto my neck, as I struggle for breath.

I hate the musk of coffee and it's suffocating scents.

I hate the taste of chocolate as it melts on my tongue

I hate how pathetic my clothes fall when they go undone

I hate skin against satin sheets.

I hate a lot of things about me.