Hesitation made me miss
Opportunities turned into a wish
That I made the effort to be in your midst
I took the present for granted
Now Im haunted by my inaction when I reminisce
Plans pushed off and dismissed
Because I never considered a world in which you didn't exist
Denying delays processing, the news didn't stick
It took a few weeks before the reality hit
My numb stone face fortress diminished to piles of brick
Exposed and vulnerable
I've experienced death but none ever hurt like this
Life is fleeting, death is patient and waiting
Mortal shells fickle, their hold on our spirits strained with the days
The future perpetual in its becoming the past
Our lingering end appears random and quick
Indescriminate is the embrace of demise
Inevitable is its kiss
The debt of borrowed breath will one day seek repayment
Take time today, or spend tomorrow longing and aching
Don't waste life in fear, but never forget
You dont have forever, don't waste it wasting time
All we have is today, tomorrow never comes.

Crescent moon, a scythe,
cutting through the darkest nights.
I exhale. Relief.

"God, don't give up on me yet, I know
  I'm not your best bet, but I'm trying,
  don't give up on me yet."

I know God will never give up on me, He will never leave me, nor forsake me...

I see my actions of my hands and hear the thoughts in my mind, the lusts of my heart and even in all of this filth, my God tells me that I am free to remain in Him because he delights in me.

So to you Lord I am faithful, others would not accept as I was, but you did; and you do.

You accept me as I am and you renew me in your spirit.

You will never give up on me.
Thank you my dependable God,
and thank you for all that is to come.