There’s asteroids crashing … - down on my heart
Cause the space of my mind too often too loud
Is way overcrowded and evacuating
Painful regrets to my chest where it’s setting
It’s eyes on the so called feelings feeler
Maybe it dies or the thought calms down quicker
Either way it’s a win for this ego so feeble
Who thinks I can’t feel and thus makes me brittle
I’m fighting a war and riding my horse
In a field full of cannons, of course I’m morose
Of course I get heavy with worry and still
Showcase this story so others don’t ****
Themselves over feeling so overwhelmed
That they can’t say even they’re doing okay
Because it has become harder to pretend
Than to share the red sorrow which runs to no end
Here’s a fun one by the time this poem
Will have finished 40 men and women
Will have tried suicide, two also will win
Out of those 40, 30 are men
Never taught ever that feelings are real
And might be worthwhile to be tendered and cared
Never been taught how to feel and not think
Or to ask for help when they are at the brink
Of ending that ice cream and then every thing
There’s gunshots and bombs happening here
And long before any of those dissapear
I’ll have choked on silence and drowned in the fear
That I could’ve been judged if I ever died near
Another one like me and dared ask my kin
To help me not lose myself in the ring
It’s shameful, it’s weak, and not a man thing
We must die strong before we live soft
Then have a kid but not do a whole lot
Go work and then eat and forget all of that
Achieving dreams thing it’s not in your part
Before key realisations, drink, go to bed
Drown in the liquid, do not feel but hide
From the weights put on you by ego and pride
Until it’s too late and the barrel of steel
Is excited to help you push it all to the side
By pushing you down 6 feet underground
You see I’m worried I’ll end up just like them
Although I am quite well intended
I think they were too
So what do I do
When I cannot see a spark coming through
And i know all the quotes already so, boo
How does a man learn about self worth
When as a man I choose bear for what it is worth
How does a man learn to make space and breath
For both himself and a relationship
And how does a man not end up alone
So he won’t be challenged in his catacomb
Tell me how do men even exist
When it’s so hard to see your own therapist
And talk about life like, every two weeks
How do men keep all the made promises
When relationships die and then time changes
And how does man not forget himself
And hold space for his needs and someone else
And has a job and a hobby or two
And then walks his dog in the afternoon
And then is well read and emotional stable
And holds his ground well yet kind of agreeable
And has a happy go lucky relationship and
Get well with his family and all the wishes
The world expects come true but where in all this
Does he even fit except his coffin
Because he did choose to hold it all in
Until no love or hug could make a way through
If I ever grow roses I truly would do
Prefer to be gardener
And not fertiliser
And if I die I would like to see the horizon
And shed tears of joy for having lived right
By my values and morals and having had in sight
Both my dreams and humanity and compassion alright
Many souls believe that to be a man
Means to gain power however you can
But for the sorrow to finally end
For men to be complete and not need to pretend
We must seek to notice what we have ignored
And at once reconnect the heart to its chord
There’s craters down here and they might never heal
But I have been nowhere that has felt so real
And if I seek to live, I must do it from here
Where softness is born and cruelty killed.
Where I don’t hold in, but I guide and I lead
And there is never pressure to follow a script
Cause I am the safety I’ve always needed
So I can be me and feel **** completed.