Trying to sleep 16 hours a day
Is hard when your mind is hooked on decay
Walking all day back and forth in a hall
Hurts a little bit when the tile starts to crawl
You can't feel when you're starting to sleep but everytime I do my nose starts to bleed
Wish I was with somebody knew but I can't get you to let go of this noose
Would be nice if I could have the other guy
But I'm at a different place in my life
And he's in a situation just trying to survive
And everytime we talk I have to justify
Why it's all okay and it's not that wrong ok now goodnight

I feel you on high
I see you in tides
I want you forever
You kindly decline
I need you right here
You don't seem to care
I helped you to climb
The cliff helped me slide
I still think of you
Each day that we're through
You don't seem to know
Where all that I go
I need you so
You're
All I want
You're all my thoughts
You're all I am

My neighbor and I take showers at the same time
I know because his shower wall is next to mine
He hears my shower water flow through the pipes and I hear his at the same time
My neighbor and I only see each other sometimes
I don't think he works
I work all the time
I don't think he does much except shower and get high
And I know he gets high because one time I heard him while I was getting high at the same time

I can't love just one person
I tried for a long time
My mind wanders and my heart aches
I find myself leaning on your shoes
I find myself smelling your hair
The therapist says I'm bored
I know what would fix it
She suggests painting
I don't want to paint
I don't want to knit
I'd like to see him again
I will see him again
But I can't be with him
And I can't think of him
And I can't love just one person

You make my heart stop
Then jump
High
Higher than you
Hi
How are you
And I know that you
Are always
Happy
With me
A drink of water
Discretionary
And I am unavailable
Because you are unobtainable

On a street
somewhere in nowhere
is where you were killed
when a no one kills someone in nowhere
it burns
when no ones are people with badges and guns
oh how I wish they would have used the guns
but no one is humane in nowhere
only tazers and kicks will do
then the heart stops and the blood pours
and then they decide they're  through
but someone is already brain dead and swollen and blue
and I can't stop crying at even the thought of you
and now you're underground and I can't see through
and now you're underground and there's nothing anyone can do

In the ending of
all that starts with love
all that lies ahead
all that feels nothing
I still think of you
and all the things you'd do
my bruises melted off
and now I'm feeling lost
I can only try
to leave until you pine
for something you can't taste
and if the apartment window stays like it is
and the pantomime outside continues to spin
I can't stay and settle in
I can't waste myself on content