What Matter To Me?
The material possessions?
The money spent to feel joy?
No
None Of It Ever Mattered To Me.
It was what I felt emotionally, in confession.
The memories build a blooming story.
So,
Only I Saw What Mattered To Me.

The world is tainted-
Everywhere I go, the imperfection is akin to death.
The baggage my mind holds with this knowledge-
I can't feel at home on planet Earth.
The Severity
To my cursed Awareness
Brings me. no. Serenity.
And clouds my soul. in. Darkness.

Because when I loose my emotion's
my skin feels like a shell to protect
me from all the physical attacks
that the world rains on top of me
but what of my vulnerable soul?
When my body is cut or wounded
it shows the pain by bleeding
When my soul gains a scar
all I can do is hold the wound as my emotions bleed

I hate to say my body is just a shell.
Just That, A Shell.
But it's true, protecting me from physical attacks.
I Hate That, A Shell.
But it's true, my knees give way because of soul attacks.

I wound myself because I am aware.
I am wounded because the world is unaware.
I wound myself because I am unable to understand.
I am wounded because no one wants to understand.
I bleed myself because the world is tainted, corrupted.
I am bleeding because I understand that, I Am, tainted, corrupted.
I bleed myself because I need to feel pain to stay sane.
I am bleeding because the world never let me feel sane.

I am
My worst enemy
Despicable, Cunning, Vile
I just wanted harmony
I am
My worst enemy
Fragile, Unending, Unfilial
I hated this destiny

How can you love what destroys you?
The great saying of..
You can't love someone until..
You start to love yourself..
I never loved myself
All because of an inner eternal battle.
I never loved myself
All because I was looking for an equal field.

How can you love what destroys you?
You don't. That is the simple answer.
To destroy is to obliterate.
To destroy is to become nonexistent.
I. Deep down inside. What to destroy myself.

Myself is a danger to Myself.
A person I fear that will take it all.
Myself is endanger.
I Can't Fall In Love
All because I would endanger her.
All because there is no beauty in this beast.
All because I would fear one day hurting her.
All because there is no harmony around that beast.

I am
My worst enemy
Despicable, Cunning, Vile
I just wanted harmony
I am
My worst enemy
Fragile, Unending, Unfilial
I hated this destiny

Myself is a danger to Myself.
A person I fear that will take it all.
Myself is endanger.
I Can't Fall In Love
In a prospect to protect her.
Intent to hold down the beast myself.
In an attempted to save her.
Intent to only destroy that beast mirror of myself.

-Rose are Red-
-Violets are Blue-
..I wish that demon was dead..
...So that I could always love you...
.I wished for Harmony.
.But was dealt a dreaded Destiny.

A Lawless Man Shows the cover of his book
Showered in a golden peace
A Lawless Man wears a suite and tie
Stuck with a silver tongue drooling with words of peace
A Lawless Man turns you foolish
From the mouth and tongue
To the mind burning in mind yelling!
Only if I could re-start oh I wish yes I wish
The people who walk by or near
Will wish that he had never appear
In death they will be consumed by their actions made of fear
Yelling from the blood that stained the ground!
**** you! **** you why won't you disappear!

The very Lawless Man
He will look in their eyes to their souls
With a sinister feel and a sinister smile
He says..
"Why if you knew me I couldn't grab you,
I envy you so much that I want all of you,
My greed ****** me, in my anger you who is with me
I'm here to do the same to you, so you may be ****** here too!"

He's an evil man walking as if he isn't
A fear even so more there is two
Followed the beast itself under a cloak of hate
In its mouth it yells in a shroud

Find the light and you may not be consumed
Find the light you will understand the next words
For it is to Die and Live than to Live and Die
Do not commit the act unto yourselves
wait for the world to hate you as it has hated him
be thrown in the eyes of a being that despises
for it will slew you and slew those with you
in front of those who love that defiler
and they will all say this is entertainment
For this is great in my eyes
But in the end they all die
Taken to a world they chose willingly
to scorn with the tongue and deny the power and will unto him
for he is, was, will, and shall be
they will never stop to him but they will do so
out of eye in pain forever and ever

A Lawless Man
Hides behind a great reason the sways the mind
A Lawless Plan
Is its act to use your mind to take your soul to keep you in line
Remember!
Men, Women
Sons, Daughters
Fellow Brothers and Sisters!
It is to be
The one thing reason can't explain and show with the eyes
Is the unexplainable for it has us curious and forever will
But I hope you know in the center of that unknown
Is not the "god" of this world
BUT the very God of what is all and isn't
Only the heart can explain not feeble creations from flesh and man

FOR HE LOVED US FIRST AND FOR THAT REASON SO WE LOVE HIM AS DUE, LET HIM HAVE AN EAR THAT UNDERSTANDS THE WORD FOR THE WORDS, THE SPIRIT THAT GAVE US A SPIRIT THAT WE WILL UNDERSTAND AND OPEN OURSELVES TO THE UNEXPLAIN ABLE TRUTH!
Ahmen

Every pain I have felt
Left fragile scares on my skin
Scarlet roses peirce my skin as i slowly melt
Forgetting whats its like to protect my kin
It hurts when your alone
I am one left with one score in the unknown

Cuts that healed weaker than before
I scream at these blades in a cold scenery
How has my heart not felt sore
When the the pain that engraved in is my enemy
This is blasphemy, a cruel twist of sorcery
Im unable to feel more because there is less of me

It hurts when your alone
Because
The unknown is completely a
Unpredictable zone

Even me and myself
Has let go and left
The person that is I
Are they lost just like I?

My heart has fallen
My mind broken
I fell I've arrive a little too late
I'm in this Delusional State
Feel with my face on the ground
If I scream or yelled would it even make a sound

I'm sitting still in pain
Wishing someone would say my name
Other than the voices the drag me down
Hoping someone says show no more that frown
Because
I'm bleeding these emotions
that are slowly suffocating me as I sleep
with these dreams taking away myself
The more I sleep
The more I know less about me
****** this delusional state
Hiding the love and making me hate
If only I could see the sun before its to late
Or ask the moon what is my reason, what is my fate

The more I feel less human
The more I yearn to be a man
The more I feel less of a man
The more I yearn to be a human
If only it was simple
If i could have to one needed principle
Why is it so evil
Why is it evil

My heart has fallen
My mind broken
I feel I've arrive a little too late
I'm in this Delusional State
Fell with my face on the ground
If I scream or yelled would it even make a sound

Why was the pain delivered, Relentless
Why was my actions regrettable, I'm Reckless
Dull to myself and people around me, Senseless
I can only pity my own actions and myself, I'm helpless
If only I could find a way
Out of my illusion
Id speak face to face to my delusion
If only i was strong enough to have my own persecution
I hope I'll find a way
Just can't tell if it will be today
Why is it so evil
Why is it evil.

This world is on its own
Left in water so shallow
Hearts of every human
Seems to be only hollow
Filled in lost void
Emotionless life of an android
What are we?
Who have we become?
Why wage war with me and you?
While muttering who will we be?

Do You See The Unkown
That lies beyond my own heart
Simply in pain and over grown
Covering the iris of My Eyes
For i am who i am
While all the same i ask
Am i?

The lost is our fate
The people end in life to be
Waltzing in time on destiny's melody
Do you know what i see
Lost children, with out care,
Taking all, stealing,
Withs hearts of fire and flare,
While the dead are the ones singing.

Do You See The Unkown
That lies beyond my own heart
Simply in pain and over grown
Covering the iris of My Eyes
For i am who i am
While all the same i ask
Am i?

Who are.... you?
I ask who.... are you?
But also who... are... you...

The days were dark before
Stranded with out a lantern
Fearing my light lost its spark
Hoping my heart wasn't to be barren
So I prayed
For it to shine over me
So I prayed
My eyes would open to only see
Everything that was in front of me
To smell sweetly from the breeze of the sea
Even if i was to bleed
I knew deep down it was what i need

I pray for
Heavenly Wings Of Glory
From my one true god
I wish for his sweet mercy
To know what it is to love
With the greatest sincerity

The days i remember have been forgotten
I embark to my new world of gods ark
He said quikly hasten
For i will take you away from the dark

Shine in glory
Behold and embrace the light
Rise to tell testimony in life story
Rise abobe from weak to strong so bright

Heavenly Wings Of Glory
Heavenly Wings Of Glory
Fly me to a place
Where i can be forgiven
Send me on race
To deserve my loveing home amongst heaven
Heavenly Wings Of Glory
YES! AHMEN!
Heavenly Wings Of Glory
IN ALMIGHTY GOD! YES! AHMEN!
My lord and god guide me
To where all is easy to see
Help be believe
To a state where i can't be decieved
When all stars align
I rejoice of all soul and heart in your sign

Take me to mercy
Take me to tranquility
Take me to a unbelieveable scenery
I believe in me ebcause you did so first for me!

The feeling of the most hated glares
A monster that makes all normal
Pain in the beginning as pain dares
Stained and carried along with his soul

The questions followed 16 years
Thinking if he knew the truth it would bring no justice
The Truth Of Loneliness is beyond fears
For it is only the one with no patience
As the darkness in emotions grow near
He's semming to only have questions, nothing is clear
The more he ask why is the more despair
Wondering if he was ever even there

The towns are silent
More-so with every step
That echoes past the vigilant
As he calmly walks he only wept

Who will know how he feels
How will they understand
Who could he tell
That believed with a calm outreached hand

His heart is truly heavy
Because no one shares his anger
Even in the happiest of melodies
He wishes the life before was better

To wish a reincarnation never followed
Because then he would never remember that he was hollowed
Even in the face of god and death in his core
He wishes to go back with revenge to wage war

On the people that looked at him with discust
The people who betrayed his open hand to the world
When denied of the world of his help he saw no trust
Realizing that only live among and helping would slowly fade away the rust

He just wanted what every person had
The things he never could even fathom to dream
So far out of reach he was more likly to become dead
But at the end of anger and at most questions the only thought to scream
He was lost, He felt the truth to be lost
He was alone in life and mind of soul
His spirit in pain it would only howl
Becaus of the
Truth Of LONELINESS
Sad ending of greatness
Who was mistreated and deprived of all happiness
Even in the end only 6 was to witness
5 around as one laughed as he reeked of death thinking he finally found it quitless

This is my reincarnation testimony
I submit my will to it master and mistress
Im tired of remembering sadness in my own hell including my own ******
Those who casted me away, adrift alone, you cant choose to miss this
For if it carried with me
Over timelines, over galaxies
I will follow you to find your end is in me
There is no pitty, Theres no apologies
Your the reason ill never be free
Never be free
So i will end your plans in dynasties
I'll end all your plans among your dynasties
Just to personally
Help you feel what you did to me
Because of i will not be happy
So i WILL take what makes you truly feel free
This is my promise to you of how youll end
For you was a friend, but my stained soul will never simply allow it to end.

I want to know
When it flutters
I want to know
If its pure, light like feathers
But i seem to loose the meaning
I cant catch the concept
Why cant i know
Seems i only know how i wept

My heart feels as if its stone
Petrifying my bones
Corrupting my thoughts and zone
Why do i only know how it feels to be alone
It feels forever noon
Wishing this rain will end soon

Oh i know, i know
You seem to see how i feel
Your mouth says forget and we can go
I act with but in my mind can you be real
Could you be real and say you dont understand
So i dont fly with false hopes
Just to end as i crash land
Why didnt i prepare some safety ropes

I feel guliable
I seem unreliable
By my fire unseizeable
Because its Dying Flames
That always holds my shames
I wish my mind wasnt playing games

I know it holds horrid pain
But i want to hear the truth
I know its not fair in your brain
But only if i could hear your heart

Because...
My Heart cant take lies
I cant take words that only dies
Then will it fall from the skies
Wait for a collapse as i slowly close my eyes

Listening to it break
As My Heart
Slowly shakes and quakes
Quitly tearing apart.

Its Strange
I feel it but i still cant explain the change
Maybe Im slowly loosing in my age
Its true My Love Is In You
I still cant analyze the sky when its blue
Ill always hold my heart as you do

I dont see anger
Anymore
I can see im leaving the danger
Ill always forever adore
But its too quite
Just way too quite

Its Strange
I dont understand my image
Fighting to understand my emotions
Stuck at war without a sword
Its so Strange
Because of all my mental baggage
If only i would soothe my inner oceans
I can truly only fight with my word
My Love Is In You
So why is there none inside myself
I wish to see myself
So i can say dont overestimate yourself

Its truly a mystery
Living in my shoes of my story
I cant even explain my history
Its a Strange discovery
So Strange
To ignore on my age
So Strange
To always turn a new page.

Im ganna be great
Watch out im your biggest threat
Listen up, Listen up
This is my true fate
Full Throttle
As i drop my whiskey bottle

I feel my soul
No i wont pay your toll
Im only here to grow
Keep it to yourself because i wont feel low
Yeah you know
Im really about to let go!

I dont want to habe your pitty
Because if you cared this would never happen
Boast about yourself, your ugly not pretty
Inside your heart your the only one laughin
If only you knew, If only you knew
Its better to be in the light
Because in darkness you yourself will sue
Dont look with your eyes the heart has true sight
If only it was true
You wouldnt have to fight
Lifes to short
To simply forget and abort

Im ganna be great
Watch out im your biggest threat
Listen up, Listen up
This is my true fate
Full Throttle
As i drop my whiskey bottle

I feel my soul
No i wont pay your toll
Im only here to grow
Keep it to yourself because i wont feel low
Yeah you know
Im really about to let go!

Life is dark
But you can choose paradise quick as a spark
Life is more than a simple ark
Dogs have less bite than any bark

Yeah if you know
Bring it all out
Full Throttle
No more sadness
You can only be living inside happiness
Full Throttle
Out no more to grovel
Get on my level
You need to drop the sarrows under the shovel!

Just Full Throttle
Only you can!
Just Full Throttle
Make a worth of your own end!
You are your only hope
Your only fate
Dont become bait!

It isnt simple
With thoughts in their own will leave ripples
It was never so simple
Please slow me in the temple
So i can be with my people
To be with my people

Why are words misguided
Tells the same amount of truths as a lie
When i write i act on impulse
As if the pen is what made me die
My words are lost
Some quicker than others toss
But honestly im not distressed
Cause who could i care its their loss

If only they had a heart
Theyd be human
If only they watched when they spoke
Theyd care to be human
If only they kew what
Being a human was really like
This pain leaves tears
From peasants to all kings and queens of hearts
Its them that make me fear
To let them personally know how i felt sheding my last tear

Its not just their fault
I need you to hault
Listen its all of us even me
We are our own shackles keeping us from being free
Truly i pitty
Every notion that is beautiful and ugly
We are our own enemy
Because the enemy of my enemy is still
My own enemy.

They say their lost forever
The emotions was severed
It burns without them in fire
In their whispers
They tell of a liar
No one knows
Of who he is or if its even a she
No one knows
What the fee is of the truth

Troubled Souls
Lost in this haughty hole
No one knows or will know
Where is it that they even go
The Destiny Of Troubled Souls
Has no mercy
Only silence seems to grow
May god have mecy

One man or women to betray
All those innocent lives
All was taken away
From their lovers, children, and wives
This fire took them
It has no mercy or serenity

He was not all hate in their hearts
When love fell under the thunder
People began to discriminate and spread apart
She slowly became his lover
For he was from a place not known
He was a strange taboo but he grown
To his heart he would die
To her people she would lie

Wishing for the blissness of the dandilions
But love was like fire, burning till everything was gone
These lovers betrayed everyone
Even went against the moon and sun
For their doings and sins was never forgotten

For love always prevails
But not all are on good trails
There was and never will be a happy ending
From here their love story was simply only the beginning.

Where i am
Here and now
What I'm Feelin'
Is no stranger
I'm slowly drifting away
I don't know if i know myself now
What I'm Feelin'
Seems to always put me in danger

I still don't know how
How things got this ugly

I just couldn't allow
To let myself for some reason be happy

My life is fallen
Down a deep, deep void
But i would be lie'n
If i said i wasn't annoyed

Stairing in the mirror daily
I scream an yell at him
Say'in straight at his face vaguely
I dont know who he is or how i met him

What I'm Feelin'
Is War
Oh, What I'm Feelin'
Is angry at who i am...

But i swear on the life that was given
To allow me to be born,
I swear i wont let you down
Forgive me when i blow the sacred horn!

I feel no shame
In killing the old me
I feel no blame
From ending what could have ****** me

Ill dig him a grave
Come back 3 times a year
Ill leave a black rose
For he was made with fear
In truth of honesty
I saw a part of myself die, let go 'mongst his tears

What I'm Feelin'
Here and now
What I'm Feelin'
Couldn't be stranger
I truly let him drift away
I just wish in his ending he'd know him self now
What I'm Feelin'
Strangly fills me with anger

He never could understand
Who he was and why he did
But now i hope he watches me from the wind and sand
To help wish me the things he never could do, for now in vain he layed.

A way to live
Is unexpected
The ways people die
Is very well reflected
I choose to deny that undying pain
Because simply my emotions are deflected

Reported to the reaper
As death seeks my heart
No other pain
Will define me or tear me apart
For this is my opening
A phoenixes destiny i am simply a part

In my life i have no remorse
Because the love is strong
Constantly
Always
In a un dying
In a un ending
Memory
With a simple
Rebirth

Tell me my love
Am i good enough?
To simply be
A phoenix
Tell me my love
Is it really good enough?
To simply rebirth
In your glass heart filled with the galaxy

What's with being a poet?
What does it truly mean
What was it have meant
What has those words seen

A lot of these thoughts
Run throughout my mind
And yet
I don't understand

…
Silence awakes me
Something isn't right
My heart isn't within me
Something isn't right

I ask all you've that's made it
What's it like using words
To express to feel
Because my thoughts are overrated
Re drawn and debated
Let me go
So I can think some more
Forever enclosed
In a chair
With this pen
And paper
Stuck amongst my sin

Who am i to judge
With a bottle of whiskey
No champagne to hold a grudge
These sins seem to be deadly
Am i a spirit held to my own will
By fate i asked till this date
All time for me has stand still
Fueling me with all hate

Oh bottled gini
What wish can i get from you
The young boy ask happily
Can you show me love

He rubbed the lamp
And soon his life was to be damp
With his own blood
Death seems to have open a flood
Upon this young boy
Upon this young boy

Shed a tear
Release all signs of fear
encase my heart
With sadness as I depart
Visual laminations
My mind sees bright observations

So Lay Me Down!
With sword in hand
give me my mighty crown
As I myself, deuterate to sand
Let my love go on
Shall be shown with my face
My tears
Up high fears
Leave me to repent
For all hate that I am
I consent
For I am to blame

Hold me?
Why wouldn't you
Hold me!
Why

These Rising Tides
Are no deal
to me its something I just feel
Swallowing My Hope
Makes it hard to travel
But my anger will unravel
Devastation
Isolation
Misguidance
All in defiance

No one sees me
You hold my heat to plead
For love, For Love
No one sees in me
The inner demon I do feed
For love, I defile my other dove

With pain
Nightmares
Deceive my brain
Truly no one cares

My anger
Like waves in a monsoon
My anger
Swallowing My Hope so soon

Great stories
Great memories
Defile my heart
But not my soul
Four, Elements
Two reside in the heart
One in the soul
One with body
Surprise this is the afterlife

I cant seem to get out
of my own dark mind
My soul ripped to shreds
Whats there left to find

Falling down
This rabbit hole
A fox swallowed by hope
Falling down
Death awaits at the end of this hole
Like a fox with little to no hope

I cant seem to rise
Out of my dark thoughts
Leaving death at my own size
May the world as I know rot