You owe me
The days I spent chasing your every wish
And trying to keep in your lane.
When I fell down and got hurt
I forgot that it wouldn't change your thoughts.

You owe me
Sweet affirmations I offered unto you.
Words dripped in honey to
Soothe all your wounds.
Yet, you're too busy flattering your ego
To offer an apology for you are never wrong.

You owe me
The stars planted in my eyes and the
thorns integrated in my heart.
When I followed your every command
And promised to take you everyday
to cloud nine.
But your wishes was to love and be loved honesty.
By anyone except yours truly.

You owe me plenty.
For my heart is always
burdened and empty.
Cause you usually don't see me waiting
Yet, I'm the one who would bear all your achings.

I would write up your debts.
And make you know your regrets.
But I won't leave you cause I'm sad
We'll part someday with my heart smiling with proof.
You owe me the every joy of my youth.

We're together tonight.
Whisper words
Hidden smiles
Then we lock eyes
Subtle touches, tight hugs.

Suddenly a kiss on the lips.
Your smell, our taste.
Yet I feel empty and dead
No heart pounding, no sweaty palms.
Is this how it's suppose to be?
My head's quiet, my heart's dead.

They say this is forbidden love.
Sinful touches, dark words.
Is this how I wanna love you?
Spark's fading, love's wrong.
Yet you're a good person
You think I'm pretty, you like my voice.

But this dark ,dark night
The wind bruised my skin
Our actions leave me hallow.
I can't really see you
You're all shadow.
"Did you have fun with me here?" You asked
I'm sad to say that's far from the truth.
My Eden will never be here with you.

I'm sure, I'll beat the odds
You asked me, are you okay?
Are you eating well?
How's life?
I'm appalled
Save your goodwill, when you lie
I can tell

Hannah Montana! Come to Jackson.
I've always loved you simply and purely
As the little Bee gaze at you with utter adoration
I was certain I could keep you despite the complications
But somethings are further than distance
So I sold my soul and gave up on persistence

When the Bees meet, they make honey
We're happy with no money
I'm sure family is meant to be together
Afraid I'll lose direction and focus on life's comforts
I loved and lost, I was bold
But my heart grew so tired, then bitter and cold
I locked it away in anticipation of the Bee's glow

Dissonant voices roar
My hymns of passion they tainted and stole
Through memories of pretty child hood songs
I'll find my way to the Bee's honeycomb

I've been scared of getting fat
Walking the streets alone at night
That dark space behind an opened door
And people whispering when I turn my back
To write on the board

I've been scared of creating a scene and others seeing me hurt
Going to the market with a low battery
Of being seen as too desperate
Not catching up and others getting ahead
And my rabbit sneaking in my room to *** on my bed

I've been scared of my Mom seeing me fail
Of being groped on the streets or the bus
Terrified of affection and the idea of being touched
Someone's opening the bathroom door when I got soap in my eyes
Having something pretty that makes me laugh then cry

Let's say I'm scared all the time
Can't help it
The world is pretty terrifying
I mean, it has crying babies who pull your hair
And cute bunnies who *** on your bed
Yeah, terrifying **** like that

But there's One thing that doesn't scare me
In life's unpredictability and harsh realities
A notion that makes me want to giggle
There's just One thing that settles my trouble heart and gives me bliss
The thought that just for a second you might believe...................................
             Such a thing exists