I remember when you said,
"Maybe we should leave this town".
I said, "Nah, Sorry Mate. I got too many relatives running around".

You said, "That's alright",
But the furrow of your brow made you looks cross.
And no matter what I say,
It's like you're a fishing line and I'm an albatross.

I swam across an ocean,
To save your drowning body.
I revived you on the beach,
Your clothes wet and soggy.
Never had I imaged,
As soon as you opened your eyes,
That you'd thank somebody else.
Oh, What a surprise.

I was mean to my sister the other day,
And then she started crying,
I was mean because she told me, "You never help".
When all week I'd been trying.

She tugs my heart strings of frustrated symphonies,
Makes me feel bad when I stand up for myself,
Then complaines to my Mother about my horrible behaviour,
As if she didn't induce it when like stones her words pelt.

I'd swim oceans to save her drowning mind,
But she never seems to care,
So she yells, sighs and stomps like a child of two,
Whilst in frustration I pull at my hair.

There seems to be a problem,
A problem with humanity,
As it seems we have no sanity left,
Because surviving committed that theft long ago.

People have forgotten how to feel,
We have lost sight of what is real,
And no one is allowed an opinion anymore without repercussions.

It's as though we're in a drought of genuine people,
Humans who feel and talk about what is real.
**** your ideals,
I don't care "What appeals?"
All I care about is surviving,
Surviving on this rotting hell of a planet.

A black book of feelings lies on my bedroom floor,
Beside an abandoned book of rambling,
That left my brain sore.

My foot is tapping to my heartbeat,
As my blood is pumped round and round.
While my ears explore the silence,
Of the things that can't be found.

A revolutionary thought appears,
To quickly disappear again,
So I curse my brain remembering that memory isn't my friend.

And my tongue stutters and trips over itself,
Making fools out of my teeth,
As I tell my friends they're materialistic,
For not realizing what's best lies underneath.

It’s unresponsive,
You will not hug me back,
You’re sarcastic when I question what you say.
How can I be loved?
When will you understand?
I am related to you by blood,
You love your family,
But it doesn't mean you have to like them.

There, There we go, yes there.
The girl with the pretty dress and flowers in her hair.
There, There we go, Yes there,
The student bored sitting in a chair.
There, There we go, Yes there,
The love that came out of nowhere.
There, There we go, Yes there,
The boy with the heart beyond repair.
There, There we go, Yes there,
The girl without a crippling care.

She left without a word.
It was like loosing a limb,

Or she'd chucked me in the ocean,
Knowing I couldn't swim.

I burnt the letter I was meant to send,
Because I realised you're not even my friend.
I conducted these emotions,
Out of heartbreak and bones.
Conflicting in my head,
"I suppose", "I suppose".

Your blunt replies for messages,
Where nothing but a cry.
Over a girl who used you,
Then made you wonder "why?"

So I wrote her name in an envelope too,
Then put it on the fire alongside you.
I smirked for a while,
In that heart breaking style.
As you burned, As you burned, As you burned.

My councillor told me I was pretty,
And that would be ok.
If those weren't the words,
She was paid to say.

You're hopeless.
Completely utterly lost.
This bizarre abyss of feelings is haunting,
Even your councillor has no idea what you're on about.
Despite this you charge head on,
Armour strong longsword drawn.
Then you shatter into pieces,
As anxiety strokes your face.

Dancing around my empty house,
With knickers on my head,
Thanking God that today,
I actually got out of bed.

I live in a humble seaside town.
There's nothing much to do here,
Unless you want to drown.

The sea air is refreshing,
You know everyone around,
Mutual friends and distant relatives are always here to be found.

City people come down to enjoy the beach.
Scoffing on ice cream,
And hearing the seagulls screech.

Jumping into the sea on a hot summer's day,
Getting sunburnt on their backs,
From the suncream they forgot again.

I live in a small seaside town,
There's nothing much to do here,
Except a few arcades around.

The sea air is refreshing,
Especially in the rain,
When you can walk and think for yourself without people driving you insane.

City people come down to enjoy the beach,
Talking obnoxiously loud,
Throwing chips at seagulls for a bit of peace.

Jumping into the sea on a hot summer's day,
As the local people mope around,
Wishing they'd go away.

Six brutal stabbings,
All to the chest.
One, two and three caused a lot of suffering,
But I can't feel the rest.

My fingertips are tingling,
My throat parched and sore.
Corresponding with the stab wounds,
A pile of blood lies on the floor.

My skin is bruised and tortured,
My mind it aches with questions.
I would've put on an armour chest,
If I had known your intentions.

The way your fingers so easily intertwined with mine,
I thought that you loved me?
I thought we were fine!?
But then on your lies you choked.

Is this depression?
I'll never know.

This isn't the way they portray it,
In films and plays and books.

No background cause for this mental decline,
No atmospheric music for the hook.

This is depression,
It's real and it's raw.

So what the **** are you romanticising it for?

You've got another life growing inside of you,
Two hearts in the same body,
Different rhythm and beat,
So really you're eating for two,
And you've got four feet.

Then supposedly you have ten toes,
Which means you have twenty,
And sixteen fingers,
Four thumbs,
And going to the loo must be strange,
Considering you've got two bums.

He snarls his hate righteously,
Leaving Cancer causing chemicals in the air,

And you digest the deceit from his poisonous tongue,
As his lies tangle in your hair.

It’s not that I don’t love you,
I love you far too much.
It’s just that I fear,
Darling we may lose touch.
Your heart is beautiful.
My gosh you make me swoon,
But most love stories are tragic,
And lead to certain doom.

We’re both very awkward,
But it works very well.
I can’t imagine life without you,
Cause in my heart you always dwell.

Your laughter sporadic yet tantalizing,
Is a beautiful sound to me,
Even if you do sound like a lost seagull,
Being chased by a cat up a tree.

You say you can't see yourself with anyone else,
That you want to keep me forever,
But I feel as though our love is weak,
And can be severed by a feather.

Although, this is hard to say,
As there are pictures of you in my room,
Darling, You better start pulling your weight,
Or I'll be leaving you soon.

Your Dad says that I'll be his daughter in law,
But we both know that's not true,
Cause we could spend a whole summer apart,
And not in one second would I miss you.

My family think that you're the one,
But in my mind I know that's not fair,
Cause all you ever do is rip me apart,
And leave my soul in despair.

Real friends are there when you're breaking,
Or to keep you steady when you're roller skating.

You have a kind heart so you will struggle,
Although this is sad, it is true,
But if you hold onto hope you'll get somewhere,
A place of fresh air and something new.

There are vicious circles you will have to go round,
But with every bruise there comes a lesson,
And sometimes we stumble over ourselves,
But strong arms will catch us and warm voices will ease your tension.

You have a long road ahead of you,
One with cracks, bumps and hills,
So yes, sometimes you will fall down and cry,
But other times you'll be laughing at the thrills.

Please remember this my lovely,
There are some things you cannot change,
and although you will shake and you will be anxious,
Through courage and bravery is how great lives are made.

Congratulations!
You're now a part of the grey.
Here's your certificate to state;
That you'll slowly decay.

Everything will seem fine,
But as soon as you get home,
You'll lock yourself away,
And destroy your phone.

Your hands will go numb,
Your voice will become weak.
You will not speak to anyone,
In almost three weeks.

Solitude will eat you,
Gnaw at your bones.
People will assume you're fine,
But it's not their life to suppose.

You smiled so sweetly,
With your fingers crossed behind your back.
The vows you spat lies of a serpent,
Nothing more, Nothing less.

You were so tangled up in yourself,
You forgot to care for others.
I detest your family name,
So thank God I have no brothers.

As you gulped down your poisonous wine.
I'd never thought you'd been so mean,
But you wandered off as if we were fine.
Blocking out our screams.

I find it remarkable you know my name,
As I am the last one.
So tell me Father would it have been the same,
If I were born a son?

I have a sore throat,
So I can't really talk right now.
I think it's because I didn't wear my coat,
When the rain was pouring down.

And the grey clouds above me,
Where like your eyebrows frowning because you didn't understand what I meant.
And your shouts were like the hailstones,
Crashing down on the hard cement.

The wind displayed your violence,
Pushing me back making me hide.
Then the sun displayed your remorse,
As you held me when I cried.

Thunder roared your negative thoughts,
When feelings fell from above.
Mimicking snow to get me excited,
Just like you did with your love.

I've always found it ironic.

That as Humans,
We fight for peace.

"I never meant to hurt him."
They swear upon their strife,
But they never showed him kindness,
Until he took his own life.

"We were only joking."
They exclaim with worried faces,
But I didn't see him laughing,
When you bruised him in secret places.

"We never knew he felt that way."
That's because you didn't care,
You called him Vile names,
As you spat and pulled his hair.

"We would've stopped if we'd known."
You should've stopped anyway,
Surely the whole ******* world knows,
That bullying is not ok.

If I were the Earth,
You'd be the sun.

"How are you doing?"
He asked, plastic smile wide.
Playing with a bullet between his fingers,
Considering homicide.

A peace symbol on the wall behind him.
Hypercritical state of mind.
Tells me that he loves his family,
So it's confusing to find,
That he bombs others in another country.

Practicing homicide.

We've tried talking,
But words just leave things messy.

We've tried ignoring,
But then we get lonely and stressy.

I broke down in secret,
Cried The Nile out to try and staunch the famine.

But only when my heart was ripped out,
Did you finally get a chance to examine,

The wounds that you caused.

What do you want me to say?
What the **** do you want me to do?

If you do end up killing yourself,
I will not make a martyr out of you.

When you dance around the room,
No worry in your eyes,
I can feel the doom,
That's society's going to revive.

We do not fit it,
I know that very well,
But who said I wanted to?
Your ideals can go to hell.

I mean there are times I wish I wasn't a woman.
Times I've hated my *****,
Wished I didn't have periods,
And got angry at my ******,
But most of the time I'm alright with it.

I still get angry at my ******* though.
If men can show them why can't I?
I mean, Adam and Eve didn't wear clothes,
But then they realised they were naked.

I get angry that I'm a woman,
Because Men get ***** too.
They have emotions and they can be the damsel in distress.

But overall I'm relatively happy.
Even though this generation is ironic,
And gives me a ******* headache.

I was walking home,
And I swear I saw,
Somewhere in the sky,
The clouds forming into a laughing man,
As another soul kissed this world Goodbye.

If emotions were physical things,
Mine would be a gaping wound.

They travel in packs,
The ring leader the main culprit.
These "lovely girls" with their scowling eyes,
Their latest victim unaware.
Their claws are sharp,
Voices vile,
Seems that being a ***** is truly in style.

Her smiles are bitter sweet,
Because she's not just anyone you'd meet.
Her knowledge of this is so refined,
That you wouldn't dare waste her time.

She's got places to go and people to see,
So why would she stay with you aimlessly?
Whilst she's living the dream you're stuck at home,
Listening to the ramble of a hypocrite down the phone.

Remember two peoples life's are different things,
So don't cling to them like hook and loop fastening,
Live your life explore the world!
Because it's much better than waiting for her to return.

He told me that he loved me,
And I believed his lie.
Then every time he kissed me,
I felt a part of my heart die.
Trapped to a land corrupt,
He had me bound in chains.
Why did I believe you,
When you said you changed?

I will always write warmly about you,
You're a solid battle cry.
No Demon known to man can take you,
Angelic wings stretched wide.

I've hummed lullabies to your meaning,
Of certain love and grace.
You are contentment and a homely feeling,
You're beautiful and you're safe.

Crystals have reflected in your honesty,
Rainbow colour grins.
When humans can be muted anomalies,
You're the bird that still sings.

I think I might be broken,
Now I know that seems strange,
But I'm loosing all my colour,
And everythings turning grey.

My life used to be in subtle pastels,
Some friends faces would glow gold,
But now everyone seems washed out,
Like it's just a side effect of growing old.

My sisters all shine a grieving red,
My Mother a drowning blue,
My Grandparents colours seem to have fled,
Like maybe they're washed out too.

The green grass I live on is quickly turning yellow,
The brown leaves of dying tree's remind me of loss,
As the bright and excitable gradually turn mellow,
Isn't it a shame what "Just existing costs?"

This year we will prosper,
Be bright and ready to run.

Ahead towards fertile ideas,
Onwards towards the sun!

We danced in my kitchen one winter evening,
Moving in strange timings which didn’t quite go with the song,
But I remember that wide grin on your face glowing,
As you spun round and round.

The hot tea we had made was going cold,
But we didn’t care,
Because we just snuggled under blankets,
And our love was all the warmth we needed.

I cannot blame my Father,
For the vile things his heart did.

To hate is so simple,
What's difficult is to forgive.

Broken, Broken, Broken.
Cursed at the edge.
The bottle smashed on the table,
Sharp half in your hand.
Pointing very stubbornly,
Straight at my heart,
Enforcing love gently,
This is where the killing starts.

I don't want to be famous,
Or even well known.
I just want to be snuggled up in bed,
With a cup of tea, A book and my phone.

Are you trying to make me ill?
Because this is a recipe for disaster,
When I can plaster on a smile at will,
Is it understanding that you're after?

You comment on my weight,
But you cannot control my way of being.
Yet, my lungs still deflate,
And the the blood from my heart starts weeping.

Perhaps we were to switch places,
You were I and I were you,
Then maybe you'd understand all the faces,
I have to wear in front of you.

Out of control,
My minds got a voice.
I can't console my memories,
And I haven't got a choice.
This world is not my destiny.
I don't understand,
How can you have me so securely in the palm of your hand?

My pathways are in construction,
I'm lost and it's dark.
So how do you remember the directions leading straight to my heart?

My blood won't clot,
My scars won't heal,
Tell me now do you understand,
Exactly how I feel?

Tell me the truth,
Just the reason you left.
Because I've never been sure,
I've heard you committed adultery,
But how can I know that's true,
I was still in my Mothers womb when you left.
When you ran,
Into the arms of the ***** that  caused this war.

Give me some time,
I need to understand.
Is it my heart that you want?
Or just for people to see you holding my hand?
I told you not to rush,
These things take time.
But you simply grinned,
Saying you were mine.

I can't seem to find a job,
Which really isn't rare,
But all I want is some stable income,
Enough so I can prepare,

Prepare for when I feel like treating my friends,
Or enough to pay off debts,
I don't want to get stuck in a vicious circle,
Of loan and repay and repent.

It seems that now living costs money,
A smiles a pound a minute
Using those pounds to pay for lottery tickets,
Though we know we'll never win it.

A world of money grabbing scoundrels,
That's how this economy works,
They'll swipe your wallet out your pocket,
And leave you in the dirt.

It's absolutely ridiculous,
It's barmy, it's mad,
Everyone's obsessed with ten pound notes,
Designer clothes and fads.

No one thinks to change the way they're living,
No one wants to be free,
From the people with small minds,
And the rules of a society.

No one thinks about a friendly face,
That is worth more than credit cards,
Cause money won't pick you up,
When your life is in shards.

I can't seem to find a job,
But I don't think I care,
Cause I'm rich in family, Friends and laughter,
And for that there is no fare.