trying to tell yourself "I'm fine, I don't care" But all the hurt festers Turns a thing that once was pure Into the fruit of a vine that grew sour While you're in denial The cat's away And the mice will play When the filter gets stripped from your eyes And you realise You've been seeing color where it's black and white..
My thoughts form organically Flowing paths like rivers The easiest way is down So down we go Breath held And eyes shut This machine doesn't sleep Chugging in spirals blowing off steam Red lines run through conscious minds And walls are built around panic triggers I'm always waiting... Stave it off for a moment While I catch my breath Strive to deal chronologically But sequences are only patterns And those are fabrics of being I am what I am I've only started seeing..
that line from that song "maybe you could've been something I'd be good at" resounding when I close the door seeing you around every corner my brain keeps screaming no you've been burned before But I still see you and it's always empty after the 90 degree. it didn't end, it stopped I'd take flames over ice...
Didn't be, Couldn't see Between maybes.. Think I lie when I say I don't care.. But I've tried,line won't fray Don't you dare Judge my choices, I chose my vices I've paid my prices..
I'm lonely but I'm free Didn't sell out for packaged love..
Can anyone feel I need someone? Will the darkness sink Like clouds of sand in the ocean? I need to be told I'll be okay But everyone left Because I told them to They wanted love All I could give Was attention. Is there a way to be alright? I'm broken in ways That can't be described.. What do you call a person Who started reading poetry To understand what life should feel like? I'm sure there's a category.. What I wouldn't give To unring that bell.. Are there words that can be said To make this darkness sink Like clouds of sand?
Stuck in the same destructive cycle Get lost in the shadows that define it Heart beats a descriptive thud Mind finds some comfort In the familiar rejection. Invisible hands press on my shoulders Voices whisper in my ear: Open your eyes girl You were never good enough That's why they always leave you That's why they don't want you. Every time I close my eyes There's another thing I've failed at.. All the thoughts clutter down Like tin cans falling through a chute In need of distraction I fall back into the rhythm The cycle of destruction.. Trying to shut it all out But rocking myself in the darkness Only makes it grow louder I'm not good enough I'm a fraud I'm a failure... Don't let them get to know me I'm a mess underneath the skin
This is why I want to live under the stars No walls no echoes There's a place there For people like me