head spinning too fast, emotions spilling too much, please, leave me here untouched

they ask me if it's like but i'm convinced it must be love because like couldn't have weathered not even half of the storms i've been through for you, under you, into you; like couldn't have caused chest-pain-akin-to-a-heart-attack-pain when i thought you had died after not answering for a week; like couldn't have pulled me in so long my body became it's own magnet without needing any of your gravitational pull; like couldn't have had me writing poems about you convinced 'like' has left a long time ago

and darling i will wait for you forever because my brain is too loud and my mouth is too quiet and somehow you make my mouth speak melodies a poet's never dreamt of and my brain hum the tune of silence it only hears in the heartbeat of the dark

he was afraid of the dark until her black eyes and black hair
made him turn  
nocturnal

Step 1: *don’t

you make me feel pink
when all i feel are
the colours that come up
on brain screenings

it's as if somebody taught him how to hold the rope, put the knots in between his hands and told him to squeeze, watched the blood drip from everywhere but his heart, showed him that it was safer that way

it's as if someone taught him how to tie the rope, how to make one knot then two, two loops around the collar bone and under the jaw, as if someone told him that it was better to learn to hate her than to learn to love her because it's safer that way

but it's as if nobody taught him that to every method there's a fallout, didn't teach him that people survive hangings, didn't teach him that i can learn how to tie knots too