there are many ways to spell it out
or say it out loud
I craved for it
it was a long time until I was sure—
almost sure I could never own it
I stopped dreaming
then I saw others having something I couldn’t even dream to have
that drove a rush in me
I couldn’t explain
was it jealousy?
or a plain hatred?
today, I’m sure I still want it
I’ll keep dreaming
because a girl like me can only dream
another phase of misery all over again