She had the habit
To shove her fingers
Down her raw throat
Re-flexing her repetitive gag
Her imperfect eyes, beginning to sag
I asked her what if...
We had a second chance
Belt up your baggy pants

I can feel two sides of me
Ripping my unsteady being apart
Your craziness drove me insane as well
You are still this way
A child with no words could tell
I can't help but repent on the past
In the back of my mind I listen to you yell
No blink of happiness will ever last

I watched a boy hug his mother
Their smiles outshine the tips of damp grass
How I would die to be him
To feel something within
That faint spark of joy
To wrap your arms around the one you love
I wished we had that for each other, mother
Will we have it above?