"Forget me already. It's not mmm... good for you to still remember me. Uhh; I want you gone from my life, please?" Sarah requested with frustration creased on her face.

Sarah wasn't your average university student, ash blonde with streaks of red in her hair, slim tanned legs just enough to make a young teen salivate. She was neither tall nor short, and if Goldilocks had met Sarah before Goldilocks would have exclaimed 'just right' about Sarah's height. You couldn't tell whether she was rich nor poor because Sarah had always worn amiable denim jeans though they were always ripped. It could have just been her fashion statement, a sardonic "looky over here people. I'm charming pfft, no one knows how charming I am and I don't even have to show skin to do so". Sarah though seemingly perfect on the surface, had always had self esteem issues; she'd mumble sentences and say "don't worry" when she struggled to convey herself.

"... Please?" Sarah requested with frustration creased on her face.
    To Jim, this was the usual request he'd heard over and over. At this point, about a million and twenty three times; it no longer phased him. Jim gulped in a mouthful of air before going onto his retaliation; except his retaliation did not involve calling her 'a *****' nor did it involve calling her 'a **** covered ***** that no one will ever love'. No... Jim was civil tongued in a rather strange demeanour.

"Sarah darling. The moment I forget you, the skies will fall, the clouds will shake, rain will flood the Earth because the very second I forget you, my world and I will have been destroyed", Jim said with a sheepish grin. Jim was a cunning man, almost too smart for his own good at times. He'd always reminisce on that one date he had with Sarah. He had taken her to a nearby farm, and nearby to a suburban kid was a two and half hour drive. The farm was not the most romantic place but to Jim, cow manure and sheep manure whispered "this is the most organic and romantic place you can ever find". The minute they had arrived in the general location of the farm, Sarah had already been, hungry, tired, sleepy, angry and most of all she had to put up with Jim not revealing anything to her....So fear was one of the cause of her anxiety with Jim, though she could trust Jim with her life so it somewhat lessened, the very moment that fear piqued.

The ground, wet soil, faint smells of manure, 'Nature'. Jim flaunted the minute he had arrived "HOLY SHEEP! Look around Sarah, aren't they wonderful?"
          Sarah mumbled, as she most likely always does "they....mmmm....they are nice....umm I guess".

Jim projected his voice, shocking Sarah again, but at this point a feather falling to the ground would have spooked poor little Sarah. "SARAH! Look over here. Do you see the cow. Why don't we call her Cherry?"

"Why Cherry?" Sarah asked with a puzzled look on her face.

Jim took a big breath of the farmland air "Because ...cherries are edible."

Sarah slightly disgusted but with a smile on her face nonetheless.

Suddenly, Jim grew quiet; and for a blabbermouth, 'would forget to breathe because he's talking' Jim, this is a pointer that there may be something that wasn't exactly right.

Jim spoke, breaking the silence created by the void of words that was Jim and Sarah, 'Babe. I've been thinking... and before you jump to conclusions, no we are not breaking up, not on a farmland, that's how you'll **** me and feed my bodies to the pig or something....and nothing eats Jim Thorens except dinosaurs. I wanted to say, I've been thinking about how lucky I am. No I didn't win the lottery, nor did I come to an inheritance of a million dollars; one because I don't gamble and two because ...my shitheap of a family won't even leave a cent to me probably. But I am a lucky man, because I have you and having you is like winning the lottery. It is like inheriting a million dollars. It is like having the palms of the world, in a single minute I get to hold your hand."

Sarah spoke, tears invading the corner of her eyes, "Maybe this world is too good for us. I don't know but lately, it feels as though walls are collapsing and I can't keep feigning it anymore. I chose to come along with you in hopes you'd end things with me", Sarah had hardly ever spoken for so long without a few umms or ahhs in the way, but this time something came over her.

"...But I love you babe. Don't you love me?" Jim building a bridge to clear the doubt in between their relationships. Sadly, the bridge he built in the form of a question did not support the weight that they both held. One loving too much, and another loving too little.

A few days had passed. Well what was a few days for those who aren't heartbroken, felt like decades for those with a hellish hole forming in their hearts. A few days, merely a few days, with the overclouding, overbearing sensation of a lifetime.

Jim Thorens had called Sarah Silva to arrange a meeting, with the tone of 'complete strangers, who tried to hid that they were past lovers'. "Hey Sarah, It's Jim here. I've been wondering if...ummm if you'd ahh want to get a coffee. So we can have a little umm chat?" Jim spoke as he left a voicemail.

Jim Thorens saw Sarah Silva making her way to the empty chair in front of him, a smile lit on his face as it had always done in the before-times. Except now, it wasn't the same as the before times.

"Forget me already." Sarah mouthed in silence and though Jim could not read lips, he understood. He understood every bit of that silent air.

"Forget me already. It's not good for you to still remember me. I want you gone from my life, please?" Sarah requested with frustration creased on her face and a subtle roll of her eyes. This time, Jim's pain was audible.

"What if we..." Jim started to speak before being completely cut off by Sarah.

"Don't worry". Sarah said, as she stood up and left.

State of mind. Officially heard of, yet
never assumed involvement, as yet
another word I had defined for me,
so I could make sense of something
some persons now are dying
to squelch or digest as best.

National State Mind Possession,
bound
by oathz as old as stirrups
and Koumiss to Scythian warriors.

Tuvan chorus sings defining mode
---------------------
crossing mind divides, up the tree
learning ever is ever relearned.
Measured across gravity,
at speed… diametric
push comes to pull,
shove into science,
twowordone mind hold,
from dia "across, between"
+ legein "speak"
from PIE root *leg- (1)
"to collect, gather,"
with derivatives meaning
"to speak (to 'pick out words')").
Picking critical similarities not unique
Relegein,
so we are in a weform, holy gnoshit.

Danger prestate,
child mind, alone,
left, there, that old time religion, eh,
good enough
for me, keep the baby,
safe, no escaping the baby born, but,

if we are gods,
as Jesus is said to have
asked some who told Luke'n'em have
you never read…
apokrinomai-
Is it not written
in your law, I said,
Ye are gods?
I am the door:
by me if any man enter in,
he shall be saved,
and shall go in and out,
and find pasture… as a free spirit

== o o o indeed advance guard,
force recon, reconnoiter… synchro
realize, animation projection screen

music, lose.
Consci-use make of
any umms that remain,
these are keeping our reality human
artificial products of collective dialectic

always,
on goes,
off stops, think,
recall as
from a dream, awake, only,
never
does a dream tell itself
to you.
You always tell you first, awake.

Do, done, this is a story coming alive,
with my efforting,
with your spiritual reception
in mind, intending your current opinion,
consciously ties sense where missing,
to hold ties to
historical canonical events,

the death of dinosaurs,
the killing fields of Khmer reds,

the shame on Richard Nixon, then
the glory for restoring relations
with the oldest civilization,
- inadvertent, unintentionally
allowing Kung Fu
to accompany
Lao Tzu bringing wisdom from China,
and unbelievable ping pong teams, to
Mohave County Union High School,
seeding shén as an ai hai hope, in me,
chosen most politically minded Class of 66, and editor of the Bulldog,
always ready to culturally exchange,

to trade Huckleberry Finn,
and Red Badge of Courage,
for a respectable translation
into this digital language, index
matrix adapting courage to core.

“The Way of Virtue”  
a new POV wrong Tzu, sorry,
conscience, Tzus of two minds,
among the books bought
in Saigon, in this telling.

Two Tzus too soon forgotten.

Way is Lao, Tao-Te-Ching… War is
Sun Tzu "The Art of War" science
used to pass culture forward,
past forgotten why we lied in
providing old excuses
for heros virtues
never lost,
like Mary's cherry
told children destined
to fight any war when called,
to prove confidence needed
to make boys believe worth
of dying while disobeying
the command to love…

gotcha… beguiled was I, indeed,
do we forgive the liar and leave
the lieing oath of aliegiance valid?
  
Religiously clinging to my own thread
of reasoning
on this side
of war, in peace
resting, while testing opinions milked
from the use
of knowledge,
conscience
conscious
right use,
twist

which
fuses words and ways to ask
what is going
on as wagwan, on
conscience,  
with knowing we know,
consciousness
of oathez sworn,
to science misdefined, sacred truthz
kosher kaballah rules
allowing easy seventy
possible roles OPM
sell the sizzle,
hot inside scoop
for each full word, a-
indeed, Aleph-ante one, is
cost to play, A-team atom,

soulsong wombless man song
they ain't no they, I am the one,

A and one, onliest, initially, I am
the loneliest number, that you ever do.

eh, old licks, new tricks,
One, two
Three Dog Night,
maybe, close, old recall whistle,
the train that don't carry our kind,
-hear it nearin' last stop

ramblin', gamblin', traipsin' off t'learn,

how come we
to be so poor, and some
be doing nothing be so fine, just fine,

not asking any more,
got plenty,
mor'd be good,
but plenty be good, enough's
'plenty
to share but you gotta chew,

been dried since last winter sometime,
we could have a stew, but if we chew,
we could just have a chat, tell a tale,
not need no salt or water or a ***,
or a fire which then wants wood…

think maybe we got lucky to live now.

We got this light to write on.