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Sidharth Suraj Dec 2020
A dead soul matters the most,
as there's no one else that
can force you preserve and cherish memories better and truthfuly.

You hesitate to erase them.
Even if you lack the visuals,
you'd create some mirage joining the
missed and uncovered notes.
You'd tell stories from the
almost unexisting backyard of your mind and with all the more excitement,
which probably you never shared,
when they were still breathing.

Those you plan on to create,
have the spark of undefined.
You might surpass undefined,
that'd be the extent of your love.

If dead man looks back,
he'd be proud and smiling,
You think alike those irrational dreamers.
Don't you ?
You talked about existentialism and vagueness in things like how
intransient life and death embrace closely,
with warmth and shivering pain.
Times when you had cease to exist
you'd not think about them
and they may not recall you anymore.

Perhaps everything beyond life is irrational, sliding the thoughts in your
subconscious carefully,
not with a hint of expressing the urge of exploring.
The taboo between you and them
why not in life you seek the same comfort
of randomness,
you wish but you fail to organise the terms
And patterns.

Just now I think what a corpse would feel when it reads my Art, probably
The dead man Smiles back and says
"I may fade with time,
my flesh may blend with soil
but I keep on living with those who know my story ".
Conscious of a dead man, is maybe the only mystery we could never explore.
Evey Aug 2018
You have me feeling,
Feeling hopeful than usual.

You are seeing me in my most honest element

You would not like the girl who layed on the ground awaiting to be picked up by him.

I now feel unafraid to lose for what does not want to stay
For what is not meant to stay

I am only
afraid
Tired
Drained
to add number 9

Old habits try to break me
As fast as they come and slow to go

They rapidly repeat...

His mouth matches experiment 1
He does not want you like experiemt 5
He is seeing someone else like 1 and 5

It won't be the same tomorrow
I'll know his real truth tomorrow

"good morning chula"
..my heart smiles

you are still here

And this cycle of hopeless thoughts repeat and repeat and repeat

"how are you chula?"
..my heart smiles

You are still here

And this dam cycle of fear repeats and repeats and repeats
late at night when you disappear for 2 days
At times

"como  te va?"
...my heart melts
..You are still here

Number 8?
Let's see where this goes

Years of practice
Proud and tall
She picks herself up
Cripled at heart
But she's up

You are now just a pair of eyes I want to impress for the better of me

..if I can do it.

Heart in cloud 9
Brought down to step 1.
"let's see where we go"
He says

Only 3 months in
I know I sound crazy
You are not mine yet
but simply a friend

Truthfuly and most sweet

I now know
soft whispers
Patient steps
Eyes that see me
Hands that push

I feel consistency
AH...

  sigh...       what a glorious sigh...
that I: aye?! i... little i...

something about
Aristotles' poetic that i can't quiete grasp:

in the ancient world
the people didn't paint:
but they: sculpted...

imagine how i think:
testament of thinking per se:
i don't really
think...

         nothing doesn't think:
nothing is a pronoun,
in the category of words:

my my: my most devilish and i:
an isc on
a leash
i don't have the time to appropriate
invoke... invoke is a better word

i'm here to paint!
Aristotles' poetics clarified
the obliviousness of language
to a philosopher...

i'm here's to paint!
so i'll paint... by punctuation!
i'll paint by punctuation!
and...
each... and... every...
line break pillcrow will not be:
my last...

if Spinoza wrote his Treaties in Hell:
i'll...
go ahead...
nothing is a pronoun and it speaks
more than god speaks
ever... truly... listen to: nothing?

but women can give birth
and it feels weird
disclosing that Reyla is my daughter...
genetics and phonetics
and blah blah the intellectual apes
are public intellectuals!
Gremlins get off!
give me the Unity with my brothers
the Siech: Sicz: Cossack BRONE!

women give birth but are rarely
strangulated by nothing...
forget Nietzsche's work ethic
and boredom:
if pronouns is what..
touch wood...
whoops! i just touched iron and i looked
at it and you looked at it
and we both hoped it was wood:
but it was iron...

just like a golden ring looks great
on a black finger...
so must a silver ring and moon
look good on the finglet
of the pigglet pink in white
on a finger the moon: is mine! to answer!

madness madness!

   if... you... say... so...
i'm here to paint!
i'm here to conjure all the oyster
raw meat delicacies...
but people of the ancient world
didn't paint!
they sculpted!
now see the impasse
how smart the modern people are
and how dumb the ancient people were?
see how there's this definition of humanity
by:

memory-erasure...
we will: forget!
we will rememeber!
but we will also!
die!
forget!
we will die!
we will: forget!

and by forgetting we will
imagine!
because there are archetypes
of humanity
not reincarnated
but from all origins: an abiding
concern for narrative:
and dialogue:
and monologue...

i'm here to paint with
punctuation and diacritical markers
atop of letters...
but not today:
today i'm all chaos and storm
and the grain of porridge
and the distance of raindrops on
the window come the daft ghouls of the night:
oopsie: oopsie...

but i'm here baby'oh:
owl my woo and lunatic...
woe and luminiscence...
but i'm here baby oh...
      just this you're not my baby
baby O...
                      now comes the measure
and with enough atom bombs one
might content with volcanos...

                     Mt. Vistivius... or who
the tragedy of Pomepeii...
Christ was crucified...
a truthfuly historic presence...
an event to topple all other events?
i ask: in Heidegger's vein
to the artery....
Heidegger: question-worthiness...
Zeitgeist: news-worthiness...

     thought is a muddling puzzle
of philosophers and opportunistic hacks...
the ones genetically displaced...
but then only the lower IQ strata replicate:
and we need bus drivers....
what we don't want is
for the rupture...

           intellectuals agitating the public
with a historical-conscience...

WE ARE MANY:
who says who to whom in the great agitation?
this is not... painting?!
this... is... not... words as... painting?!
MILLWALL! MILLWALL!
the SCOTCH CONNECTION!
that one... part of London:
Elephant and Castle
that i love...           why did i decide
to support Millwall?
       oh...                 mate... just the south
London architecture... the feel of the place...
couldn't feel it closest to either
Arsenal, Tottenham of West Ham grounds...

SCHLUS! MACHTUNG!
ABERZ! ABERZ!
SCHNELL SCHNELL SCHNELL!

Tartan Jersey...
you already have the colouring:
Edrick the Navy....
deep blue and purple...

— The End —