Aliens Foreign and Domestic

A little Ford bearing on its bumper
A made-in-China South Vietnamese flag
Tailgated by a menacing larger Ford
Which passes, bearing on its bumper
A made-in-China Confederate flag
And then another Ford with an image of
Nuestra Senora de Guadalupe
On U.S. 96 near the Wal-Mart -
There must be something in all that
    But what?

When I’ve gone to my reward
And finally my tale is told
Folks will gather and hopefully say
He died of being old.

When under the influence of drink
I might have died of driving my car
Or that time I hit on a local cop
In what I thought was a gay bar.
I could have died taking some drugs
Some stranger gave to me one night
With some of the junk going around then
I would have gone down without a fight.

And when I’ve gone to my reward
And finally my tale is told
Folks will gather and hopefully say
He died of being old.

I tailgated, I walked dark streets late
I had a smart mouth, unwise and loud.
I ignored good advice to my misfortune
Because I was too callow and proud.
I might have bought the whole farm
By sneaking texting while I was driving.
So many times I stacked the deck
Against myself ultimately surviving.

And when I’ve gone to my reward
And finally my tale is told
Folks will gather and hopefully say
He died of being old.

Waking up confused and lost,
wondering where my friends are.
Blacking out can come with a cost,
cause now im in the back of a police car.

How did I get myself into this,
this I did not know.
Last thing I remember was a kiss
and being at the xtu anniversary show.

I must have tailgated a little too hard,
I guess I shouldn't have brought my funnel.
Cause now my knees are torn and scarred
and I'm walking near a railroad tunnel.

If only I could remember where we parked,
the lot name was escaping me.
Because of the adventure I just embarked,
my brain had become an absentee.

After wondering around aimlessly,
the name finally popped in my head.
"It was Campbells Field," as I shook my head shamelessly.

He complained, as he drove,
a car behind him too **** near;
he gazed at the speedometer,
the car was on his rear.
It passed us... doing sixty,
the speed limit, forty-five;
some drivers just like fast,
on speed, they seem to thrive.
He complained, as he drove,
other drivers were insane;
and the ones that tailgated,
they were his special bane.
No cops around when needed,
to catch that wily speeder;
to give to them,  a ticket,
for riding on his keister.
He complained, as he drove,
and I heard the tires,  sing;
then he got behind a car,
and did the same **** thing!

A young man who loathed to be last
Most often would drive very fast.
He also tailgated
Which was ill-fated.
He's now in a full-body cast.