Sugar ***** the ribbon but feel free to wear  the bow.
Hey who turned off the lights.
It's much more fun to get in touch with your feelings in the dark if ya didnt know.

Forget the missletoe lets ***** under the tree.
Why it's a holiday **** in times square.
Yeah thats feels awsome but im not sure if that was you or me.

Im in the spirt pass the Jack  and let's play hide the yule log
every Santa  loves a ** ** **.
Let's make the naughty list  for a couple of years in one night.
Sugar yes Santas happy to see ya if ya didnt know.

Ring goes the bell, no dude im getting laid so I could care less what ya got.
ten grams for the ****** and for my stoners one pound of ***.
It's the time for giving sugar and ya no they say it's better to give than recive.
No wonder Santa's  so dam happy if only ever day was Christmas Eve.

No need to hang that stocking cause something else is gonna get stuffed tonight.
Why miss Santa in that dress  the elves can almost see your Reindeer.
yes kids i know im not right.

Its a party for two no shirt or shoes required
Deck the halls hey why not invite your sister holly.
It's playtime at the north pole hell no wonder this ***** elf is so Jolly.

On ya little hampsters we must go.
Hey its more than just snow that does blow.
Yes holidays are hell  well for most sure spike the punch
i'll pass on the cookie.
Forget the gifts cause all i want is some holiday nookie.

Breath counts our days and nights like God.

Breath during twilight laid into blissful sleep,
breath of newborn welcoming the world,
breath during considerations on storm of frozen years,
breath of mortally terrified man thrown into abyss,
breath of memories creeping into oblivion,
breath during ecstatic experience of union with beloved,
breath of bard in sanctuary,
breath of soul while symphony plays in it,
breath during interference of God's message,
breath during observation of visible signs of what is performed in soul,
breath while you are overwhelmed by primal instincts,
breath during kiss affecting the sphere of sensuous ,
breath during awakening of images of love sick from excess of words,
breath during the intervention of God in life,
breath on the path of recognition of the idea of ​​good,
breath during  maturity examination in the field of theological virtues,
breath during reward of unrighteousness,
breath during arrangement of feelings.

Breath releases emotions without need of Katarsis.
Breath strengthens internal sense of security.
Breath makes soul your guide and teacher.
Breath makes possible
connection of mind,body and soul,
deliverance from the darkness of ignorance,
release from bonds of illusion,
separation of the spiritual needs and ****** needs,
to experience spectrum of human feelings,
to be a man distinguishing good from evil,
to celebrate life in all its glory,
to get rid of belifes limitating mind,
to enter into spiritual and physical world,
to study cosmological issues,
to hipothesize and recive answers,  
to experience fulfillment in the field of love,  
to overcome chaotic desires of our soul,  
to use the knowledge gained before entering the body,
to become an expression of divinity,
to imitate order of nature,
to dry out unusual flowers under a pile of books,
to experience God's Providence,
to prove that justice is worthy of having,
to exploit  days and nights in conformity with destiny,
to avoid venial sins in the future,
to exceed usual consiousness,
to dance in lake with stony bottom,
to think about something we never experienced,
to avoid the loss of sensitivity of the moral conscience,
to cry in defense of the poor,
to express  respect and love for fellow beings.

Breath is the hourglass measuring time grain by grain.

AT&T; was good but then I hit a dead zone
I need a company that doesn't go off one second then I get a signal the next
I need a company that will treat me like a customer should be treated

AT&T; was fine up to a point
Until I had to pay more to revice more
Until I had to work harder and deal with mixed messages

I need New phone service
A new service where I don't get all these wierd messages
Where I can pay less and recive more
I just need New phone service

Dear English,
Oh how I dread you.
With all the essays I write,
I just hate you more.
With all the bad grades I recive,
I wish you would just go away,
Then maybe I'd recive an a.

Your on my mind all the time ,And I'am just
Lost in the memory but its fine

Someday you'll see I was the real one ,I just wish that day would come

Patently I'll just wait I have no choice, Its meant to be said the little voice.

If not in this life perhaps the next, silently I wait looking for your text

I stare at my phone hoping it will bring the joy I recive from that one little thing

I think to myself if only she knew , things would be different and me not so blue.

But I know its not true, I do all I can do. maybe I'am not the one after all.

It matters not someday you will see ,its always been just you for me.

I wish to be the best
I want to be the best
But is talk is all that's left
Am I going to leave everything to rest
Or should I work and pass the test
Well will I leave the net
That's holding me back from being the best
I know the road is long but I am ready for the test
I pray to God because without him I would never achieve
I wouldn't be ever recive the gifts  that I already have
I want to get out of my chest that I would never accomplish anything and that I would never be the best.
I am stuck in a black hole where I believe nothing is going my way and as much as I fight I find out I fall even deeper.
I never gave up but as I go my emotions play it's game
I feel down a lot and sometimes it gets to a point where I feel insane
I question myself wether I will ever reach my goal
Will I be the best doctor the world has ever known
Or will I still fall back to the unknown.
Am I a good person or am I hurting people's souls
These questions I ask everyday I wake up and when I go home
I wish I had no worries I even fear being alone
I hope I can deal with this pressure and move on but only God will help me get out of this dome.

I let go of my fear at last
And look at you with open eyes
My enemy, my crutch, my past
You are not welcome in my life

You came in times when i was wounded
In need of comfort and of love
But you have kept me weak and bounded
Without the confidance you stole.

Now that i see you without bariers
I see your true face and rejoyce
Because now i treat myself with kindness
Cause now i know i have a choice

In this amazing vast creation
That we call our universe
The only real revalation
Is that you always have a choice

The only way that your choice matters
Is if you take it with belief
Own your decisions and your actions
Let go of what you cant recive

I never want to take your freedom away, i want it for you and for me , i want it to give each other space, to balance our energy, to have friends, but with honesty, with commitment, with communication and with mutual trust, because with this is just peaceful to live our lives without the stress of what is this without any fear or stress in this,  the way we want knowing we can come back together in peace and trust. you say i give you mental stress with my messages,maybe because i express it all, or what can i know?, and i never want to do that to you, i want you to be happy.

I give myself the time to process emotions and Maybe one day you will understand the difference between sleeping with someone and
wanting to wake up next to someone, to know the smell of the person and only wanting to wake up to say good morning and kiss you that's something i didn't experience before and it's so nice to see the sun in the eyes of another person every morning.

Maybe one day you will see the difference between spending time with someone and investing time to someone.
Maybe one day you will understand that if you want another person to let you be you need to be transparent and accept the other person as it is, let the person feel as it want to feel, be as it want to be to enjoy it, to not be so afraid to feel.
The difference between being there to get company and being there because you don't want no one else in that place, the difference between being an option and being sure if you have the chance you will chose to be there every time.

The difference between holding a body and holding a soul,  The difference between intimacy getting a naked bodies and having naked soul, is not the same to have *** than make love to someone.
To let a person in , showing everything as it is , let know your fears, dreams, regrets, pain, memories,  to put the past in the earth and stop putting water to death flowers, to let another person help you control your demons, to really be better person.
That scars and all the suffer are opportunities for growing, like scars that shows you survive its a way of showing where it hurt and where it got heal, suffering is opportunities to be a better human, we can be misserable or we can be stronger it takes the same energy to build any of this

I really put trust in you, you don't know how much is that for me. I think trust is something that can be broke so fast, it doesnt take the love away but it hurts to trust and recive lies.
You came to open old wounds for me and i think i did the same for you, i need to learn to watch my emotions and process them, and i need to protect a lot my heart, to learn to read the intentions of people.

i did everything with a lot of love and i did it because i want it and i dont regret nothing i did, maybe i will not do it that way next time, but definitely i was super happy, i wish we could be 100% because i can't give less and you cant give more and its okay, i was happy meanwhile we got it, i kind wish you were better with me, patience with me, and i kind wish i can go back i was really lost in you, you ask me to many times how can you feel so much in so short time, you dont know me, but i told you felt i do, and for me it was just easy to love you.


You want to enter to the water but you dont want to get wet, thats not living, is going in the water like a death fish,Maybe one day you will understand the difference between feeling the water taking it all in breathing and feeling it in your skin and just getting wet, maybe one day you will realized avoiding your feeling is like a loop you will just go back to the same point, that if you avoid the emotions, lessons and inner demons they will just come in different ways, people, circumstances.
It's so important to learn from lessons of life so it doesn't come over and over again, and to not carry all alone, to let yourself trust and not feel alone, i don't mean in a ****** way i mean in an emotional way .

Maybe one day you will understand that if you are expecting the perfect wave, you will lose it, because life is what you make with it, and it's how you learn to get in the waves. That if you want to try everything you will never really have anything. That lifes is made for enjoying and taking the best of every situation, is a constant learning.

Maybe one day you will understand the difference having someone in your arms and huging so close hearing your heart and think that's mine and i want my heart to go on the same rhythm, wanting to heal every part of that heart. to be chosen and not consider . maybe one day you will see

my best lessons are the things that hurt me, my last mistakes, and i hope you learn so much from this and from all. You remind me so much to a person i loved and death took away from me and  i think this is a reason for me to be so patience with you, maybe it's another reason i open so fast, and i fall so *******, it's so difficult to say goodby to you, and it's so difficult to stay angry with you i really want the best for you, and i think that's a reason i really give you the best, it was really easy to love you, to know you, to hear you.
i wish you so much healing. i want it to love you  in freedom, the thing is you don't want love . i feel super lonely right know you become my home in berlin, and i will not replace you, it was a beautiful home, but i know i will come back to me.


What if i never send you this message?, What if i keep it to myself?, What if ? Maybe i am the one who is gonna learn, and when i want to send you this messege, then im gonna wait. Until i learn this. Until i learn.