The goth doesnt know what she wants anymore

her head deep in thought as she falls to the floor

spinning in circles her torment is clear

the blackness is back and wont dissappear

time is a healer or so they all say

but here in her head the ghosts are at play

tearing her insides and shredding her soul

breaking her being death becoming her goal

will she be missed probably not

no grave with a headstone just left there to rot

neither alive nor permantly dead shes left to wander

the path in her head.

My feet are planted-
but not permantly.

Being around you-
has made me see.

There's a storm inside me-
wanting to let go.

The things you say-
but the things you show.

Doubt and furry come quite fast-
being with you will not last.

The vibe that I get from you-
doesn't make me happy, but blue.

Damaged and broken is where I've been-
looking for peace, going out on a limb.

From inside me a warm light grows-
feelling His primise, what He says shows.

I spent my whole life chasing an dream that has not been fulfilled.
Each time I finally accepted my fate another woman appeared in it.
Each time it ended dash upon the rocks , with rejection from them.
But God loving-kindness has never abandon me, but is always there.
Ready to heal me but instead of running to him for dear life.
I run to the woman that is not suppose to be in my life at least not then.
But if I was to be like Abraham and say no then maybe she would come into my life later.
Permantly without any rejection, but only acceptation and love.
For Christ has to be first in my life at all times, him first always.

Beauty: they say, is a perfectly crafted thing a small dose can throw us into a spiral of bliss.
That small piece we are allowed must be spread out evenly across the whole of our lives. We must treasure it when we have it, and when it disappears be thankful for when it was here.
Although, if we take it for granted, or take it all at the same time, it will not last.
And we will be left broken; for we are so fragile in comparison.
That small share we are given, if taken all at once, can be dangerous. Thus; leaving some broken hearted, perhaps permantly.
And those, who take it all at once or are unfortunately handed to them, are due no more beauty.
And stay sad forever.

Bang bang
Little boy jimmy was only four years old
But at four years old he already knew what death taste like

May 16, 2012 at 11:59pm

He was found laying in his bed soaking in his own blood
It was a minute before his birthday, he was turning five on May 17, 2012
He was hit by stray bullet
Or that is what they say...

May 16, 11:56 pm

Three cops barged in Jimmy's house claiming they received a call of a disturbance
Jimmy's dad died the day after he was born and his mom was single
There was no one in the house but jimmy and his mom katrina
On the police report it read that when the cops arrived Jimmy was dead and his mom was found in the corner brutally beaten and *****
She had been shot twice in the chest and once in the head
She was permantly brain damaged and paralyzed from the waist down
Everyday she cried tears of blood and no one really knew why
But it is obviously what really happened that fateful day

May 18, 2013

Katrina was found hanging from her balcony
She committed suicide
Or was it ******
Bang bang
Thus end story of Jimmy and his family

Out stretching
Out reaching
The callused, bleeding hands
Of tightly gripping on.

The permantly furrowed brow,
Weathering a face which has seen too much.
The innocent eyes try,
But are clouded over.

His everyday grows like a plane
flying over
Dunkirk dawn
Guns drawn.

His green home
Of west is best
And his voice would flow
With a carefree blow

which has blown
to fragments.

His streets turned red
When in November they would tred
To remember
Those who bled
Now they are only spotted

Every year dearer
Washing away.

Derelict lunar phase
Lacking hope
I cope
In my blood lines' archaic
Ways........
Duality ......efficiency
Meekness is not weakness .
Its likened to
Supernatural
Power kept under perfect control.
Picture a raging inferno driving the machine
Thats throwin the coal.
Synergistically
Two opposing poles forced together.
The pressure and heat so intense
Forged an unatural alliance that cannot be severed
The quickening recieved can be a mortal wound
Morally the bite  can be the mordant that
Like rabbies
Clutches you hatches and infests the  psyche
permantly
I writhe in fever thrive in the strife and love the maddness it brings
But thats just me

Lycanthropy
The triple beam
Allows me to be
The perfect friend and  gentle man
You see
Whilst staving off the rage
In the forge
I fiend
On this lunar cycle
Emotions. lachrymose to ******
The pendulum
That undulates
In the pit of me
Epitome of
A melancholy
Sanguine