A beautiful, naked man stares at me from across the room.
With excitement emulating from my pores, I smile.
Feeling aroused, I begin to touch myself to his image.
I think of all the incredible feats this man can complete.
He could outbang any man in Philly, nay, in the world,
And his system for doing so is flawless.
No woman can equal his beauty. No man is so purely masculine.
I’ve seen him perform a perfect double jack-knife twist,
Right into the lap, and *******, of Chrissy Orlando.
An impossible execution for most, but not for this Adonis,
Not for this god amongst men.
Because of lovely vocals and protruding muscles,
He, alone, defeated the dreaded Nightman.
I come close, as I picture the large amount of *******
Which throw themselves into his immaculately toned arms.
Oh! – yes! I look past the mirror, into his eyes,
And ******* pure, liquid gold onto the carpet.
I wink to myself through the glass, as Mac calls from the other side of the door.
It’s time to begin yet another day in the majestic body of
Dennis Reynolds.