After you killed me back in the dirt
Got revived, Strung out, all split apart
Shipped aboard and slung into space
Sure it wasn't the plan but in any case
You'll never be far from my heart

And though this new voyage
Is further than the last
I've gone out and come home before
Though space it changes
As each moments past
It seems now theres less to explore

So there I sit
in my captains chair
My body a vessel so sound
What waits in space
An illustrious race
To search out some new solid ground

But out i must go
For to sit all alone
Can drive a certain kind of man mad
Its true I'm doomed
to be always that kind
But I guess I'm also quite glad

Though to search umungst
dead ends unending
May be a life long chore
Romance is a dance
And I'll be moving my feet
In faith there's still something more

From far you gaze out the backwood haze
A gohst not to be named
But I'll fondly recall
That first love of mine
That taught my heart how to fall

I grabbed the lighter off the counter
I walked outside
It was late
I was home alone that night
I sat on the side of the sand box in front of my house
My hand was shaking
I was exausted
I was stressed
I just needed something
Anything

I pull the Cigarette from the altoids tin I hid it in
I pull it up to my lips
I flick the ligter and a flame shoots up
I light the end and take a deep breath it
The end glows with red embers
Suddenly everything is quiet
I exhale blowing out the smoke
It's the last gohst of my inncoence that floats away
I take another breath in and am filled with a silent minds

My mind is finally quiter
After years of no stop chatter
All is quiet

The voices in my head the fear of losing, the fights to my demons and the monsters inside my head, im trying to escape from my past, but something gets me down time at time, the fears the emotions i can't handle. Nothing gets right, i can't escape iam too weak too slow too much in pain. Why? Why is life so awful? Why isnt there any light in the dark? No end in the tunels of fear and darkness, every time i compleetly break down when the voices shout demons begin to talk and the monsters wake up. I see no way out. Pick up the blades,, do it, you've no way out.

ive the same body the same face and voice but my gohst isn't the same anymore from the inside iam a totaly different person. The monsters inside me picked my body for
                        e
                            v
                          e
                               r

In my own morose way.
Feeling half haggard.
Found myself in the company of a gohst
You remember me?i thought so
I remember you too.....tell me
Since you seem surreal.
What is the significance of the street
or this town
You and i are staggering down?
Really ????????
Thats?
What u wanna?askme????
Seaside Oregon ....best damm clam chowder.  
Got drunk as **** we did karaoke
Sonny And Cher that bar.......right over there
Funny..............
I know dont .......
Dont cry Honey ..
...iknow ..............our Honeymoon.
And yes i still remember irony
Shhhhhh it taste' like the blood we shared.
................ok ok so you remember.
So *** are we both doin here?
You tell me this youre poetry
All i could manage to say was......
Touche.........she said .....so .......
Why do we meet this way
You know i live i everett you know you can call me.
then the passionate side of me felt suffocated

Grabbed er by the hair
Pulled into the ally.
I said baby i think mabey theres too many clothes between you and me
She looked at me pulled her head back with violence and power.
lightning Sparkling in her eyes.
She said *** ..........and we kissed
Like wild fire
Still got a hand full of hair
I turnt her around hard pusshed her up against the ***** brick backside of the bar
She tried to look back at me and pushed that J low backagainst me
And said ohh Fuuccccccc.
Thats the man i fell in love with ...
*** happened to that man i knew
Where did you go..............
I started to cry ..........i said i fell in love with you..babe ......
Why did you go.............
She said ****..................
......
I woke up squeezeing and biting my pillow ..............
I hate missing her
Im begining to get aroused by the taste of my tears.