sitting underneath her knee was a lent book of entymology
something about butterflies being caught and pinned
preserved in stasis for the sake of beautiful things
cold crisp leaf wings smoked behind the glass
of a cyanide bottomed killing jar
and in that half read book all she could glean
amongst the bones of writing so lean
was the feeling that you could lie flat and cold
and be a redolent beauty despite the lack of life-

days earlier
the talking therapy had been all right.
hey, there's a ton of treatment these days
medication and conversation and there's no need
to burrow yourself away.
so they talked about feelings
as if they were quietly observing the to and fro
independent little embryos growing opinions of their own-
the indignant insistence that these things,
these emotions have names, signs, triggers
and they begin and they end and curve again-
rising up from the flat of a typeset page.

bashing a blank canvas...
   i can almost put my "faith"
in the disbelief of
having to live in a dream
of nebuchadnezzar -
the last bit...
skipping in puddles
for the relevant 2 pence
and 1 pence coins
                 of copper...
sure... a "revival of rome"...
but somehow the phonetic
encoding couldn't just... "die"...
from a people,
of a people, one-to-one...
to a people...
              "uniqueness"...
   "pride"...
             i'm finding to lodge
a justifiable word
to compensate...
          the synonym-tinged
close proximity of
   a hypocrisy
                  and a paradox...
****** life...
living a dream being
kept alive for so long...
    it's like...
   "they" didn't walk into
this farce, sleepwalking...
did they?
          i'm sorry... but the idea
that i'm living in a, "reality"
best described as wish-fulfillment...
apart from paint:
my original psychotic
detachment is as about
"psychotic" as my past ambition
of collecting swords...
yeah, long *******...
some more than half
a meter in length... hussar sabers...
curved... for a reason:
on horseback you'd require
a curved sword...
   you couldn't stab...
you'd swipe...
      because by stabbing
you'd lose your sword
with the inflicted stab wound...
              ooh the religious people...
so why the **** am i living
in a secular nightmare
of having to live out a prophesy
of the first psychoanalyst,
the prophet daniel,
    describing but one man's dream,
namely, nebuchadnezzar?
i'm guessing experiencing
l.s.d. would be bad at this point...
  nebuchadnezzar...
ingenious despotism...
carved out a legacy with the Yids
(not a slur, a prefix
derived from yiddish...
all the U-boat crew would know it)
who inscribed his dream
into sacred writing...
        and the ancient roman
spaghetti bonanza ensued...
yeah... the prophesy...
about the revival of rome...
         only when the northerners
arrived, from the east,
and... the island folk
found their worjk ethos outmatched
and...
        beyond competition...
so... "this" is... reality?
i don't think so...
   i'm basically lodged in
a dream of a man who has been
dead for... oh... 2600 years...
           it was one thing for
the ancients romans to form
their entymology / history genesis
in Troy via Virgil...
   quiet another for the
****-bongo-&-loco
   Belgians to come back from
Congo (like in that song
we didn't start the fire)
          and say: shirts off!
we're going skinny dipping in
the north sea, at midnight!
                  it's like...
did we really have to stick to
the "plan"?
    there was a "plan" to begin with?
hardly any celebration
of nihilm left,
  better get used to the fatalism...
by word, and subsequently
be deed...
           well... look at it this way...
i'm trying to extract colour
from this base counter-geometry...
and also reveal that:
i haven't read a stephen king
novel...
      nope, not one...
                 but having arrived
at the conclusion,
that i am living in - a circa 2600 year
old - despot's dream
(& interpretation by...
the person who managed
to predate Freud, i.e. Daniel)...
yeah... feels great!
      everything in this world
is about as bogus
as a ******* piñata stuffed
with banknotes...
         i know what is real...
pain...
        the rest: a ******* mirage....
and i'm done
with the frenchman,
the philosopher,
the gensis of suppositions,
the table and a ******* chair.
- but pain?
     better get used to it...
it's the only pinch
you'll ever experience
to satiate the basic
bogus nature of any other
experience...
           because at this point...
there's no point
    fiddling with cotton
to starve
    the nerves from being
given... something more than
an ****** of a *******
mollusk...
        a bit like playing
truant to the coddling apathy...
        so... why would i even bother
agitating myself
at a cheap-stab
   against someone on
(thank god i never used it)
       twitter?
           i just hate living in a reality
that derives itself from a dream
interpretation...
       and...
         in domine patris...
         wiped off any indigenous
constructs of the mind...
leaving me...
strapped like some *******
gimp... in a Greco-Judeo
           brothel of...
          whatever thinking comes
next...
   what's wolf in pollack?
   vilk...
                in finnish? susi
(**** me, that's mild)
           wolf in lithuanian?
     vilkas
     in estonian?
       hunt (but i'm guessing
it's 'hoo'nt')
               magyar?
                                           farkas...
did i miss any odd ones out
apart from the pollack?
      i know that the pollack
tongue is heavily borrowed...
   loan-words...
       some of the tongue
   is etymologically
original... "pure"...
but yeah... a great deal of it is
derived via the usage
of darlehenwörter:
                           loan-words.

   - well if i have to be honest...
- you're drinking sodium pentothal
or something?
- nope... *** & pepsi...

i can't be bothered staging
props, hiding in costumes...
     lying...
             i'll just state
the most painful truths
    and get on with it...
   yes, i know, the ******* standard
in english of either
a latin prefix
          or a greek suffix...
i just thought that my fellow
pollack "brethren"
  would not **** themselves
with so many
loan-words
for their everyday colloquial.

to the burdens of the mountain
the seas
and the skies
to the burdens of these
and the gods
a man sometimes implores
and implores so graciously for the rest
of us
that we become his imploring life
and in him We Allah Said of Muhammad
but then the Arabs became filthy rich
and didn't care to give for conversion
the gold of the dead dinosaurs
oil for blood
but i have learned the manual fear box
when others are automatic horrific
last of the Black Madonna
with the onslaught of the Swedes
and civilized Vikings
not the Norwegian
and that's a separate story
the Danes
and Saxons heroic words
i feel inclined to heroism
the craving of the imploded British Empire...
but i am a poet
of the Coliseum and the Nadir
of the British Empire:
de-emparlization
RZ
i said two things
because i thought and i felt
and i was so away from you
come with me alone
i am your husband i am not
a toy monkey
i was at my worst
but i was switching gears
between England and Poland
and you didn't have
to find the art work of how
the English inherited the best
part of the Roman concept of words
how the English inherited the minimalistic
approach
minimmal
minnimal
minimal
                  ah yes~!

               and so my love for humanity preserves itself
with a crucifix
and a pickle in a pink
and jar
and jam-jar...
i echo a living lost
of a tongue...
English in England
was once the English in the World
now the might of tongue
\reduced to the supposed thought
of man:
i see English
i don't see England
i see English
i don't see the fates
of rocks
i find myself on the sea
of thought and stable points
of ideas of ******* seas
thinking they are rivers
around islands....

god is a genius
but the thinking around is
art *******
i like it spiced with
biologistic
collective
i have no soul
i have a soul
exemplars
and clowns
i need plenty of those
this crown is about
to lose its head
but the longer i wear it
i walked into the shift
all paranoid
but then i did get the biggest
pay rise and no one is
going to congratulate me on that
it will all be kept
hush hush like
a stew of chicken hearts etc and some
better than life rice that's also
wheat..
air more song:
from Beyonce to Sam  Fender
but i'm looking for jobs for the waiting
through August
i'm a husband so far away
i rather include her in my poems
that talk to her:
i think that's how we met
up in the Plath & Hughes...
  
welcome Europe centre
like Italy:
Lombardio...
Lombarditto...
Lombarszio...
                Lamb *****: English please...
*** *** ***!
**** it... paint it word it:
same ****:
different cover!
paint it!
word it!
**** it!
put on a shirt!
white, ironed: black tie to match
up to the Teutonic Order
par:
no other... going to take up
Antarctica
and Estonia
parts of Finland
Latvia
Lithuania
and blobs of north
Pomeranian
Poland and Germany soils...

punctuation marks
and swords
i think i
love think no ordeal
like this smudge:
where painting imitates
writing
we all know the simpler
accomplishment of
EARNING via
writing:
that music sold quick
then writing...
painting: doesn't sell...
watch painting sell?
i would like my writing to become
immediately: VINTAGE...
savvy?
GRUDGE

i'm a karen
without
problems
  
    GRUDGE

GRUDGEKAREN
#anythingyouwantinthisbrightgreenworld
o­f oysters and seawaves
and i think i'm giving birth
hellow Susan:
hallow!
Susan: hello Karen!
who was this historical Catherine...
retardo briano

being married 3000 miles apart
i'm teasing fringes off civilization
she meddles in society
i'm getting civilization breathing
down my neck
then i get her little society
little women big wig out
massive society
free fu=ck for everyone!

oh wow! the mere idea: the ideally meager
i see slack
choice of colour!

we now are used to painting
roads on walls
and flowers in fruits
i think
that settles it: like so, sow and sour: oh!
i think you could paint me to point
in the right direction...

Green
Yellow
Orange
Gold
Brown

my proud heritage
of a European in Africa
i would rather
live in Africa
as ah
European
than life in Europe
as African
competing
with Sub Continent Asia
India ***** buckets and Mozart-no
Romanian children ******* up
with bad daddies
i was thinking about
trains and silence in Tokyo
like it was beyond
a shade of M=ecca and
Vat-Gy-gunjinn

i think th
at code              reservation seaters:
no seats                    there's some veil i'm tugging
tugging tugging tugging tugging at:
the "thing" doesnt want to reveal itself
but is considered
SLEEPING...
         the veil of being invisible:
i peer at god and can't see my bus pass
my projectional vect.
or i just don't know
maybe i'm talking ONOMATOPOEIA
and ONTOLOGY
and ENTYMOLOGY
are basic instructions
to face a Gladiator's invoke: against Time:
you are in no worth regarding
concept of space
you are in a universe
you are in an absence of a tooth
you are in a painting
you are alive
you tow not you you
and that's the only mystery
but there are two:

you tow not you you
i omitted the S
and possessive articles
not differentiated
from the plural S
possessive: apostrophe S
': yod... that Y as a dot
hiding dot
I in small...

                   Y
                    I

                     that's why: i is: yι

that dot is the why-you-Greek-thinker?
i am a Greek thinker
facing up to Roman Sophists
i quick
and quack
theorist
break narrative

            i becomes
[λ]                                {λ}

                 L: gamma... Γγ
i will not go beyond my idea-
my way of life beyond the Greek
but i was subverted
by the 1960s
post 1940s and the concentration camps
and how did it happen
so many people were loitering
and stopped about the idea of work?
there was a political system in place
whereby too many people were
being WELFARED...
genuine term:
on WELFARE...
job  = Center rules
you must be insane on benefits
but it's like riches unbecome
in the constant stress of food
compensate with money
sharing of focus-concepts
that hyphen compound is a schizophrenic
puzzle
one i stress invokes a necessity of
the frequent lazy
bilingual...
                  no apology yes
that's the criteria...