You see this is a classic case of
Nobody's perfect
You see my teeth are rotting away all because I thought drinking Coca Cola was the coolest thing in the world
But it is the sugar in the coke
Which makes the dental bill really high
I even thought drinking the cheap soft drinks weren't an answer but I felt like a cool person who thought drinking coke was cool but I am replacing coke with juice and water but even with juice you have to careful not to drink too much juice but I am on mental illness and I need to have something but it is costing money and really it makes me look ever so crazy
But dental bills can get high and I am the first to admit that my mouth is full of decay despite how many times I clean them
I clean them in the morning and before I go to bed but I still see decay desolving the teeth in my mouth
I wish I could go to my dentist in the sky to fix the problem
I have to make sure I understand that coke might be a nice drink
It might taste nice
But the damage it does to my body and teeth is bad
I love Coke and it makes me feel I belong in this world
It started from just a can and moved to bottles
And back in 2002 I was even more addicted to Coke when they were giving out the free bottles on the lids
I have drank more bottles of coke than you had hot dinners
I need to resist the taste the nice taste
I tried to get the image out of my head in tapestry and writing
But as I said this is a clear case of nobody's perfect
I want to feel good I hear voices of the past because
I want a better life
But what is a better life anyway
I drink coke to feel like a celebrity
I drink coke to feel young again
I want my young body back again
So I drink coke
All any other form of sugar
But I don't want diabetes
I ran around the block many times and the Coke was giving me bad voices
I went to the psych ward in 2004 and 2013 because of the Coca Cola
Ellen DeGeneres doesn't want a crazy Coke drinker on my show
You see I am writing this blog
And I still feel like tasting Coke
Even if I have a chafing on the bottom of my belly all because of the Coke
I wanted to feel like a normal guy or a young dude who gets high on the bubbles of Coca Cola
It started really when I saw young dudes drinking it on home and away
But they don't do it anymore
I drank 2 bottles of coke at a cafe in the city after I was helping people all day
I wanted to feel like an adult in a way ya know drink what I want sort of thing and I felt like if
But the dental bill came back to me
Like it was out to get me or something
The voices were forced by the Coke to send me completely crazy  
It is hard to give up Coke when you see thin people drinking it
Or footy watching guys when. They should drink water but
As I said nobody's perfect
My teeth are rotting away
Athena can't cure it
My bottom teeth are fine
But the top were decaying away
I heard this one voice saying
I will have a nice refreshing can of Coke
But i want to turn my tastebuds off Coca Cola
Because 3-00 or 5-00 a day
Can cost $1000 a year

The loneliest sunset
The cold with a chill

The link between night . . . day
Dark and nil

The chain that is life
Fused into links with death

Desolving into
A meaninglessness



Happiness and sadness
Go hand and paw

Frozen stiff now
Too cold to thaw

Bye , bye ,
My once sweet soul

Once so frisky
Always so bold

May you journey
Forever on

Because time won't
Break our eternal bond

beautiful, beautiful are your lies
engulfing  me slowly, desolving in tears
maybe, just maybe you are telling the truth
"ignorance is bliss, *** didn't they tell you?"
never did i ever believe i'd cry over you
every night

"You make me hate myself"
I am frozen
I am paralyzed
The words seep into my brain desolving it like water over cotton candy
Like a meal to starving stray pup
Like a saline knife melting rapidly in my chest
Without warning or a time for protest I begin to feel the utter devastation overflowing a cotton candy pink ooze from my pores staining your bed sheets and then your mind.
Turmoil can be felt billowing and building beneath my fingertips which lay taut and stiff against your chest as you make every attempt to collect the broken glass, to sweep it from my under my eyelids to under the rug.
An admirable but ultimately digressive goal.
Each earnest attempt to redact the words burrows them further, more tangibly into my ears,
breaking the protective barrier named ear drum to find a lovely two story home behind my eyes.
"Talk to me"
The plea itself,
though honest and resolute robs me of the ability to make a sound in any direction, specifically yours.
The spiralling despair that becomes consciousness shrieks in discerning defiance.
My thoughts mustn't be released lest to reinforce the self hatred you've gathered from my dangerously weilded words that had so carelessly danced from my tongue to your own cotton candy solution performing a passionate display of ignorance and inconsideration
How can I know which words are rotten and which words are safe for you to eat?
How can I stand and watch, in complacency or in horror, while my speech cuts you down, chipping away what fragile pieces remaining of an already bloodied but beautiful masterpiece?
How can I continue to exist in your presence at all, knowing that every heartbeat, every breath, every kiss misplaced or not could cause such a reaction?
How do I tell you that my stomach is growling and the beast of my own self hatred smiles, knowing it too has received the promise of a meal fit for an exponential growth?
I don't
Urgent expectancy hanging in the air in a thick cloud of smoke
I fumble
flounder,
Grasping for air,
For words full bodied but empty enough to satisfy and not destroy you.
A uncalculated disaster spills from my mouth,
my words limp and painfully aware that they hold no content.
This is not enough for you.
Why is it you seem crave the blade of my tongue?
I will endeavor to dull it against every rock in my heart, mind and mouth as consequence for such a heinous crime as this.
I settle on,
"I'm just sleepy"
Unsatisfaction visibly conducting your movements as you wiggle me off your chest,
The distance between our hearts becoming personified
I lay face up, making patterns in the ceiling where you would see nothing I can see marks colored in every shade of defeat.
I watch them overlap for a time
And now
The sound of your snores seep into my brain dissolving it like water over cotton candy.