I've watched you change
Into a fly
I looked away
You were on fire
I watched a change
In you
It's like you never
Had wings
Now you feel
So Alive
I've watched you change
I took you home
Set you on the glass
I pulled off your wings
Then I laughed
I watched a change
In you
It's like you never
Had wings
Now you feel
So alive
I've watched you change
It's like you never
Had wings
I look at the cross
Then I look away
Give you the gun
******* away
I've watched a change
In you
It's like you never
Had wings
Now you feel
So Alive
I've watched you change.

13 guns to make you realize that the bullet transpierces through you when you hold back,
13 wounds that mark the birthdate of the soldiers in your heart.
What if I told you that the pack of wolves you used to lead
have become some belligerent lunatics?
You were a Valyrian steel with a heartbeat,
a Northern light with a pulse.
Perhaps you were just in dire straits
when the racing bullets took you away under the hands of the ******.
13 fuzz pedals to take you home to your world of riffs and ****,
13 distortions to shield you from the noises you don't wanna hear.
Inclement dead hearts won't resurrect if they
still can't possess the
authoritative prowess to be an indestructible master of war.
13 bullets that you swallowed but you felt nothing
because 13 scythes of the lords of doom did no fear to you.
Your wolves have been wondering every single day since then;
how could you ever end that song?
And your vultures no longer could hear you sing
so they stopped spreading their wings.
Guns. Razors. Knives. Rocket Skates by Deftones.
That's a decent tune but I suppose those three gears are for battles
not for you to dismantle yourself.
13 razor blades that kept you away from consciousness,
and 13 IV tubes that left lost souls crying on your hospital bed.
At that time I realized
you were not just in dire straits
or your 6's and 7's.
The bullets that you swallowed then thrived into your heart in revolt
and it became a cancer.
I should have known.
Deftones girl, are you alright?
(You obviously are not.)
I'll play the song Rocket Skates again beside your deathbed
so that you'll wake up one day
and we would sing marches of heresy.
13 soldiers who continued the legacy of your unfinished song,
13 vultures that fly up high to your transcendental realm,
and 13 last songs from me to you.

TW- ED
this feels like *** with my ex
relapsing
a cigarette in the cold
the 2nd day without food
laying down after crying as you're abt to fall asleep
sitting in the car with you and we're both cold as **** but i don't want-
you to go inside

Waking thoughts
Lyrics to a song
Shuffle through the playlist
Find the perfect one.
Too many can describe
My mental alibi
So I just take a little time
For the lyrics to fill my mind.
Growing up there was no blue sky rhyme
Metallica, pink Floyd and the cure
Were the ones to describe my youthful shrine.
Older plays
Took some blues away
How is it that I wasn't born
In the Woodstock age?
The doors, temptations, Jim Croce
Carol king
God! It's so godly when they sing.
Then I had to hit that puberty
Like a brick to the face
Picking out my own musical taste.
Adema, korn, Dresden dolls, tool.
Stone sour, shinedown, nine inch nails
Stone temple pilots and more as well.
Give me lyrics that could scream
All the screaming out of me.
Little did I know that in my scene
I thought my music was defining me.
I'm not music. Just flesh and bone
Maybe I should expand my treble tone.
Throw some chicks in there, you know?
No one should have a song on repeat
And have that be the song you hear when we meet.
So I searched for some musical relief
I enjoy a good scream sometimes
But that's not all I breathe.
Some motion city, say anything,
Yeah I like akon, lady sovereign,
A perfect circle and deftones
Classical Mozart and Beethoven makes me feel right at home.
Silver mt Zion, some Phillip glass,
Michael nyman, now I've achieved some class.
Pink when I feel like pop or brass
Punch guys in the **** cause I'm a chick
Hell yes!
No not really. The **** part, I mean.
But I actually really do like pink.
Jon Bon jovi or Otis redding
When I want to think of this guy that I'm loving.
I might have lost track of the lyrics I was originally thinking
But with my selection I'm derailing
With musical tasting.

I still wonder if it's me who was the dys-
in our dys.functional family.
I sit atop guilt
as though it were a fine bed.
And bed is where I stay, most days.
I am the same.
Could the future be the past--
since time's not linear?

Escher struck me
not because of his geometric impossibilities...
incredible symmetries...
but my wandering mind was drawn
to the pattern, repeating...
sinking together pieces in a puzzle...
             you know the feeling.

I know it may not seem clear
but there is some stability
in fear.

You should always know what can or is killing you.
We can argue if fear is a choice,
and maybe the usage is wrong,
but death's voice isn't truly welcome
until you've seen it's face more than once.

And what do I know of facing death?
Nothing.
Standing at the razor's edge
and a stick-up and Eye-Mart Express are as close as I've come.
So,
it's fair to say
that fear, for me,
sometimes isn't a decided election.

It's a place.

The sleep-with-one-eye-open,
pray-for-omens,
waiting-for-that-other-s­***
place.

The optimist says,
"I will be prepared... A beast of battle."
The pessimist says,
"A meeting with the creator is best."
The realist says,
"Get over it."

When I watched that fly
on MTV
buzz about that ****** chic
Deftones video...
when I heard the stories
of money and glory...
and power...
and of the sour...
I knew I was done for...

It's so 'Romeo and Juliet'
except
no one will sing about my love affair
with the warring houses
of drugs
and self-worship.

In the eyes of the fleeting foxes
we were not magnificent
welcome to the machine
or rage against it
but remember
if you betray the wall
then you must bid farewell to kings
working on a mystery will bow to natural science
so hear me now my starry eyed talking heads
in the days of future past
deftones that guide us from the dark side of the moon
like time, stands still
sounds of silence will prevail
from the darkest depths of mordor
GaGas, Biebers, and bands of mindless disney orks
shall arrive from across the universe
black days shall grip this planet
down down down in a burning ring of fire
landslide
Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!
stayin alive
the day the music dies

I still talk about you,
And how you encompassed my soul.
And honestly, that feeling will never go away.
It will always be like the first day.
Your lips on mine,
In my father's hallway.
Can you honestly say
You don't remember?
I will always be passionately enthralled with you.
The push and pull of exotic enticement.
The deftones will always bring me back to your bed.
In catasaqua,
With the slushies ballroom dancing
And the old dude watching us **** in the back seat of my Plymouth acclaim.
Of tripping endlessly,
And the saying "beauty is free"
From staring at dead trees.
The bench,
And the roof.
Those feelings will always lead back to you.
I can honestly say,
I will ways love you.
It was so easy for you to say you don't love me,
But yet you instilled the fact that you'd be the only one who would.
I know now,
No matter what you say,
That I will love you more than anyone
Who will ever come your way.
I will love you,
Forever and always.

I’M LOST!!
Violently tossed,
Disarmed again,
Can’t numb the pain.

I’m a blade runner,
Cold-hearted summer,
Misunderstood opinion,
Bitter sweet oblivion.

Once made a wish
That I wanna vanish.
Lightning struck me.
Now whát?
Am I stuck here?

I’M FADED!! I’M FADED!!
Where is the edge?
The house is haunted.
Is death a revenge?

Am I hallucinating?
Is this all real around?
I guess I’m levitating.
I cannot feel the ground.

I turn on Radiohead,
All day dissociate in my bed.
I’m looking for remedy
To cure my broken melody.

I put on blissful Deftones.
I feel them healing my bones.
But night muted sound again.
Is my suffering vain?

Erase my memory
‘Cause I hate telling lies.
Awake trust in me
As I stare in your eyes.

We’re acting so shady.
Our voices are quiet,
Still can’t tell our stories.
They might cause a riot.

What’s wrong with desire
To be understood?
World put us in chains.
Can we be cured?

We’re going insane.
It’s a dangerous game.
It’s suspicious and has
No escape from the pain.

We love! Do we love?
Is this enough?
Our feelings are rotten.
We will be forgotten.

You break your heart,
I break my own.
Let’s just restart.
Let’s just reborn.

We dream of our hearts
Being peaceful as hell.
SO WE HIDE!!
Though some hit us hard
We are gonna be swell.
Right?