Ayyyyyy-
So as quite a few of you presumably know, the original creator of this page is pretty awesome.

However, from now on, there will be two people maintaining this HP page- the creator, et moi! The creator of the page will use whatever nickname she likes to differentiate herself from me, and vice versa.

We'll make sure to put the differentiation in the notes of each post, the exception being this one.

But yeah, that's about it- so hey, guys! You can call me LB ;)

Late night confessions,
aching of your strong arms
and stirring up thoughts from the deepest parts of the hell your mind runs-
Things that shouldn't be awaken, ever.

The quiet that settles into your skin,
Your steady breath hitching
on every wandering ghost
that runs across your scarred mind.

Turning inside out,
Going delusional with fear
never letting the sleep take you,
sitting up in the pitch black
trying to find your way
and not seeing anything else but you.

You're alone.

Sleepless nights lying awake in bed
trying to get another glimpse of the boy
that stole my heart
hoping that something will end the aching soon
knowing that sleeping will only just make me hurt more
for the dreams are too hard to bear-
they remind me so much
of what I want
but can't have-
at least,
not soon enough.

He was the epitome of stay away.
The guns, the knives, the tears, the deliveries.
He was the boy that screamed allurance,
the one that parents told you to stay away from,
the one that no one took the chance with.

But there was something about those eyes,
that smile,
the way he spoke.
That hidden side of him
that he wouldn't show anyone,
but me.
The Adam of the Beast,
The one that held you close and couldn't stand to see you cry,
the one that wrote poems and whispered reassurances in your ear,
the one that performed his own songs on guitar, crooning the night away,
the one sending you roses.

And yet,
Even with the violence and the danger,
I love all of him.

He took away the thorns that itches at my side
and replaced them all with roses
that stood day by day
reminding me that
I
am
loved.

The clicking of shoes
echoing  down the hall,
every clatter bursting into little
sparks
throwing ashes every way
and pushing away all that care for her.

Here in this day
I can feel the way your breath hitches
on every message
I can see your eyes smile with joy
and the way your mouth curls up
into that smile no one really knows.
The things I live for-

I miss you like you don't even know-
And all the things I whispered to myself
As the days go by,
its not working
and the words just disappear into the wind.

The shaking to my aching bones
miss your every embrace,
the solace and life you breathed into them
turning more brittle by the minute.

I think it's just me though.

There was a time when things were all right
when innocence ran true
through all the words
and simplicity was all that was asked for.
But sometimes things will tear us all apart
and it did,

It did.

It brought its wrath to our purity,
and tainted what was ours,
our perfect...
beautiful adam and eve
shot to ruins by the stupid snake
and lust and loneliness and leers,
it was gone with a blink of an eye.

But they carried on,
and though now
they were heart, war torn creatures
dragging themselves around
and trying to remember how to function
and just live
It was okay.
They were still there for each other,
even when things had turned to **** around them,
they stood tall.
Together.

When will the world see
What you've done to me?
How you brought a smile to my bruised lips,
Formed reds on my cheeks instead of the blues of bruises?
Slipped endearing love into the lyrics I sing, banishing away the blues I bellowed?
When will the world finally realize
That you really are my everything?

The stars will guide you home,
my mother once told me.
So I looked into your eyes,
and let myself be brought
back to where the heart lies,
home.

Where he went,
I don't know,
but he came back
bearing an abundance of gifts,
filled with love and desire
to try again.

And as he filled me with joy,
bursting at the seams,
all I could do was smile and nod.

I just hope it lasts.

Let the rain wash away your sins
And bring a burning fire into our hearts
Fighting to stay dry,
To live.

Let it drip down your face,
Rush down your body,
Rejuvenate the soul.

It was late-
The type of late that makes you forget everything
And make you feel anything.
When everything swirls around you
And truths invade.

The truth I came to realize?
I truly love you.
You are worth it all.

Can you feel
The air change?
Cold mornings blossoming
With swirls of smiles
And
Lyrics of laughter?

Do you remember
When the days were bright yellow
Evanescent with brightness
That made even the sun envious?

Do your remember when it started to
Dark to an orange, slowly into a red
The beautiful passionate crimson it was?

Do you remember when passion turned to
Purple and blue
Days when we were gone from each others
Embrace?

Do you remember when it all turned
Green laced with black and blue and yellow
A bruise hidden with strength?
Proof that we're alive and thriving
Hurting but only
Growing stronger?
Do you remember, my dear?

The only crime I can really accuse you of is stealing my heart.

I bit my lip
In hopes of not trembling
In fear
For I remember the days
When thimgs were so sweet
So innocent
When you were still you
And I was still me,
When things were okay.
...

Never has the smile been so forced
Perched upon sadness
Teetering into joy
But not quite.

Everyone forgot that
Past the walls of the obvious
There lay little monsters
Waiting to be noticed
Waiting to be stared at.
Once you get past those thin walls
And you begin to
see
And notice
What has begun,
There's no turning back.
The only thing left to do is to
Wonder.

We were suppossed to be there
For each other
Always.

But you've always been
Quite forgetful
Or maybe
I just bore you
And now
You're gone
Amongst new friends
Better friends
And I'm happy for you
Except
I can't help but miss
Our childish antics
Our senseless conversation
Our bickering
Our us.

The crackle of fireworks
Bloomed in the air
Wafting tendrils of smoke
Into our delicate faces.
He watched me as I stared up into the sky
My face alight with reds and blues and golds,
Smiling with twinkling eyes filled with wonder.
I glanced at him as he looked at me,
And he came closer,
Cupping my cheek and then
Pressing his soft tender lips to mine
Just as the fireworks burst in the sky
Sending sparks everywhere,
Sizzling the way we were.
We looked up,
Hands held,
And stared at our romance in the sky,
All power,
All passion,
All pure
With heat, smoke, and fire.
The fire that held us
Was burning through the cool night air
Warming us,
Letring us
Fly.
And as we stood there,
We began to realize that nothing really mattered.
It was just us all along.
Just us,
Always
Us.

I found you again
Siting at the park
With discarded roses
At your feet,
Looking for a way to get back to me,
To hold me like you used to.
I'm glad I found you-
You would've never found me,
I was lost too.

I guess my body has come to realize
That it won't see you in real life
At least,
Not any time soon.
It won't hear from you,
And it can't remember
What it was like to laugh with you,
To have an actual conversation with you...

It finally realized this,
And I guess...
I guess that's why it keeps trying to hold on,
Putting you in my dreams,
Making sure you are there
So I can never forget.

But with this,
The sadness always rolls in.
The longing of how things used to be.
The merriness of it all.
Come back home.

Sometimes I let my mind wander
And sometimes
It leads itself into
Voids of despair,
All on its own.
It'll find a thought,
And stay nestled in its cold
Embrace,
Thoughts like,
"He's done with your ******* and doesn't love you," (my personal favorite and current one- it always gets me)
"Everything is going to go to ****,"
"******,"
"Idiot,"
"There's no point for you to live."

But I always climb out.
I just...
Sometimes lose a limb or two,
And stay for a bit longer than necessary.

We held each other so tight,
Hoping in vain
That if we held tight enough
We wouldn't have to leave each other.

Everything came rushing in,
Banging open doors
And showing us all that we forgot
Reminding us why we came together
Why we were.

And now the aching is surreal,
Hard and constant,
Gnawing insides out.
Different from the way I missed him,
This ache is a dear longing for
The smiles all of you put on my face,
The help you always gave me,
My support team.

Thank you for everything.
But I can't say goodbye,
Not now when we've only just go to know each other through and through.

It's
I'll see you later,
And
Good luck with Rajiv ;3

He came into my bedroom last night,
As I curled up,
Burrowed deep into the covers
Searching for his arms.
In my head were demons
Chasing little me around.
He came in.
He banished them away,
Tall, beautiful.
Mine.
Above me, he stared at me as I dreamt
Of his eyes,
That mesmerizing voice
Soothing my fear...
He stared one last time.
He leaned down,
And kissed me.
Supple, soft.
Endearingly, as if I was as fragile as I looked,
As if I would break.
He forgot everything I've been through
While I lay, vulnerable.
He kissed me anyways,
Those tender lips...
He took away all the shivers
And took me away to a land far away,
A safer place.

But he stood up, and walked out the door afterwards.
To go to his own safe place.
Somewhere no one could hurt him,
Somewhere no one would come for him.

He just forgot to take me with him.

What scares me most is the truth,
The truth that maybe...
I'm scared.
I don't want you to leave me,
Knowing that I am nothing without you.
The truth...
That maybe
I'm weak.
I can't stand on my own,
Not without you.
...
I'm gonna keep running from the truth for now.

Each thought pierces and penetrates
My heart,
Causing irratic thumping,
Loud sighs,
Quick skipping.
I still smile,
Even through the pain.
With all the pain that comes
With all those fond memories,
Each and everyone
Reminds me the bond
Between you and I,
Everything we've been through,
And reminds me to smile.

It hurts,
A constant aching
Sharp, like a thorn in your side,
Casually corroding you carefully made
Walls away.
It's eating me away,
Heavy on my chest,
Pressure on my eyes.
...
I'm not done with hello yet,
So please don't go.

Keep memories close,
Reminders of what was
And what can still be.

Worst of all,
I am eager to bring you all your desires
Upon a single solver platter
Filled with marmalade dreams
And sun filled kisses.
To whisk away poisonous stares
And penetrating dreams of torture.

Maybe once long forgotten it will come back,
With a little bit of sweetness and
A sugary aftertaste.

She told her that she will save her,
She will carry away all her worries,
Soothe away all her problems,
And bring a smile to her face
always.

She promised never to leave.

She also stopped caring
When the crows came knocking
Kicking down doors,
Tearing her heart apart.
She stopped caring.

Guess that's why she is crying.

They all said they wouldn't leave me.
They all did.

What hurts the most though,
Was the fact that
I'm not strong enough to fight for them.

Maybe we were all so wrapped up
In our own little worlds
Concerned about grades,
Concerned about parents,
Concerned about everything else
But the things that matter most:
Our friends.
Because when it comes to it,
In the end they are the ones that will support us,
But hell,
We forgot to support them.

It hurts.
We are vain little creatures,
Forgetting the best we ever had.

Each and every text hit me like
Little sparks of fire,
Each of them igniting
And enveloping me
In this new feeling,
Spreading warmth across my body
Like warm butter,
Seeping in and soaking.
Popcorn popping in my stomach,
Bouncing up and down,
Warm and addicting.

I smiled.

So this is what it feels like to be loved.

Let me be your animal-
contain me,
care for me,
feed me and love me
and I'll stay by your side forever,
serving you
my faithful master.

I've finally got you in my grasp,
My heart pounding,
My smiles growing,
My butterflies more vicious than ever.

Just when I've finally wrapped my kind around
The impossibilty of you-
You're such an unbelievably amazing person, you know-
Everything seems to drag you away.

Now I'm only holding onto a few fingers,
My desperate clutch yearning
To rock your body once more,
But nothing ever seems to be okay.

Death invited you through his door,
Pushed you in
So you lay there,
Foot in,
Foot out.
Him holding your left hand,
Me holding you right.

I need to pull harder.

Put your chin up.
Don't let anyone see you down.
Don't you ******* dare
Sit around and wallow in self-pity.
That just proves my assumptions
That you're a little *******.
Head up, look the problen straight in their
******* eye,
And fix it.
Don't go sitting around moping,
"Oh woe is me!"
*******,
Stand the **** up,
And see how the people around you care,
And how you say your leaving as to not hurt them,
You leaving hurts them ten fold.
See how we care.
Open your ******* eyes.

It's not when you let go and let the pain rush over,
That's not when you're the strongest.
That's not strength.

Strength is being able to smile
Even when you are overwhelmed eith hardships,
And don't you forget it.

They stood together
Huddled and shivering,
Desperation brimming in their eyes.
They were so close to each other,
But yet
You could see how far they were.
How much they've gone through,
How they diverged and seperated.

It was so apparent,
In their bright eyes
How much they lived each other
As their crimson eyes
Blinked tears away,
Their split lips trembling with
Unkept promises,
Lies,
And I love you's.

Yet, nothing,
Nothing they do will ever
Keep them away,
They were catastrophic lovers,
Bound to death
And heading for oblivion.

Together,
They'll hold each other's hand,
Wipe away each other's tears,
And stand up

And walk

And soon they'll be

Gone.

She carried herself like
She only just recently found her beauty,
Smiling shyly behind masks of joy.
I guess that's what brought him to her.

Pretty soon,
They were wrapped in each other,
Like a pair of tangled earphones,
They sang melodies
To each other,
Bringing smiles
And passing notes back and forth.

But like all music,
There will always be a pause,
Then a skip,
Then a resume.

Pull me into a sharp embrace,
Holding me as if
If you hold me tight enough
You could melt away all the sorrows.

Sweep me off my feet and
Into a palace with whimsical dreams
Floating around
Music, up in the air.

Whisper tales of the light
Reminding me that I'm worth something,
Worth everything to you.
Show me how much you care.

Look me in the eye,
Mesmerize me enough to forget the world
And replace it with you,
Stealing stars from the sky and putting them in us.

Bring me to a land of no regrets.
A land of no return.
Where innocence of heart is stripped,
And the heartbreak hotel is never vacant.

Trust me,
I'm not doing this for me anymore.
I've given up on me.
There is no point in
Trying to revive the dead.
I'm doing this for you.

You're my reason.

He was so smooth,
The way he walked on over to me,
Wrapped me up in those strong arms,
And brought me close,
Whispering into my ears,
"Hey babe."
Just as I swoon,
He'll catch me before my knees buckle,
His chuckle echoing through the corridor,
My face alit with flames,
His with a sheepish,
Sneaky smile.
The dogs will bark,
The guards will holler and run.
He'll grab my hand,
And start to run,
Fast,
Faster away from the world,
And way up into outerspace,
Where we'll find our
Peace and quiet,
Where nothing will stop us,
Where we can finally come together,
And be
Us.

If she was his ocean
And he was her sky,
What happens past the horizon?
What happens
When the skies are stormy
And are unclear
Hidden away beyind
Bursts of thunder yells
And night time lightning?
What will the ocean do then?

It's hard to leave
The things you hold dear to your heart,
Its hard to leave your home,
The things you hold oh so close to you...
But sometimes the wild
It beckons
And sends you a crooked finger
Motioning for you to come closer...

...
Its hard for a butterfly to fly
With only one wing
Flapping so hard,
The other half broken
And flapping just barely.

It'll only go so far.

Don't you dare
Forget this smile.
This is the real me,
Flying through colors of ecstasy,
Like a little airplane
Floating through the air
Sprinkling
Little packets of happiness down to the ground.
I hope someone opens these packages.