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 Nov 2013 Unrequited Love
natalie
what is wrong with society?

children are crying.
teens are dying.
drug overdoses, suicides.
they cant make up their minds.

smoking dope
they have no hope.

knives are no longer used for food,
now used as  an escape from your mood

dudes are getting nudes.
girls are getting exposed,
there getting called hoes.

she's 8 and crying,
her sisters upstairs dying
not physically but mentally

bullies, insecurities.
all caused by what?
society.
you can be hated, sedated
depressed , stressed, or even  messed.

but in society,
you're only accepted if your well dressed, pretty,
powerful, or successful.

no one will ever care unless you're pretty or dead .
and that's the truth everything that must be said has been said and done.
-psm
Dear me,
Hi.
Stop getting angry at things that aren't worth
the energy of staying angry.
Take a shower.
Take five showers.
Hell, take ten showers if you want to.
Stay in bed all day and do nothing!
Watch ****** romantic movies and cry your heart out.
Don't hold yourself in because you think you're "too strong".
Stay outside all day, and make shapes in clouds.
Wake up in the morning with determination
to fall in love with your city all over again.
Find cafes and independent book stores you've never been to before.
Pretend you're a tourist and take photographs.
Stay out all night.
Breathe.
Take better care of yourself April.
You deserve it.

a.s.
Found this note I wrote to myself when i was depressed this summer. Wrote it in poem form.
You are
not the
only
one
who's
scared.
I
promise,
I promise.
Everytime i see her
i say to myself
"if i try hard enough, i could at least be half the girl she is"
but i try
i try and i try
i try harder and harder
but no matter how hard i try, i can never be her

i know the saying
"we were not made to please everyone"
but why do i feel like that is my life's obligation
why do i feel like this whirlpool of emotions always pulls me down
round and round
spiraling down, pulling me as i grasp for air
i try to breathe, but i intake and suffocate from all the pain and
all the sufferings i've been enduring
i've taken in too much
i can't do this anymore

i need relief
i need pain
beautiful pain
and that, i have found with just a single, simple blade

but you know what
maybe i should just give up
i know i wouldnt make anyone happy
whats the point in living a useless life
if you cant even make one person glad for theirs

i know what you think of me
i know im not worth it
i know all those smiles
those comforting messages
those uplifting jokes
i know all those were not because you loved me
but because you feel obligated to make me feel that i matter
im not stupid
im not blind

but maybe
i've
been
tolerating
too much
 Oct 2013 Unrequited Love
-
She's very insecure
I know that
But if only she knew
She is my kinda perfect

Flaws and all
Still beautiful

She frowns upon herself
And her looks
But if only she knew
She's the greatest book
On the dusty shelf

That need to show
What she should
Already know
About herself
And her place
In my heart
© Natali Veronica 2013.

I love you.
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