The fear is that I have become
All that I have always loathed with not knowing it
A soul stuck in a room without doors or windows
Just a feeling that all is useless by design.
The words climb all over my heart, so I choose not to speak
For to say all I feel is just a passed off fantasy
A moment of paranoia
But its not its despair, I am screaming, I am screaming , I am screaming , I am screaming
Taken like the pinch of salt I have mined.
I understand that I need never be believed for being ME
So I need to let go, but cant let go of all
You will never know how much I hate being me
To hide amongst the hate and hurt that sits with this mind
This painting is of life, it ages none it has no youth but tries to speak , just tries to speak

And all the while the distance grows between you and me

Sleeping tears are awoken by the sorrow
They take no defence in their flow
Just carry the disease of despair

Sleeping tears talk to me when aroused
They threaten that all can never be well
For despair is an emotion i can escape

All a poor child has is eye level
There is no understanding that anything existing above
WE are not allowed to see Heaven
Just told IT exists , like its pleasure really existed
I would Pray not to Pray
But to take the beauty of life by both hands and pretend this is the superficial Heaven

They built a Bridge over which we could see the righteous graft
And the righteous could see how to escape the consistency of toil
And we would laugh at what it must be like to be seen as something to look up to
For we have never seen the sun just a refection of hope
That one day will see us be the righteous

As children we took forty steps towards all we are meant to be
No thoughts that can be called our own , like dreams are owned
Amongst the ****** and fallen dreams
We hide behind a railway bridge
Where do we find these thoughts – that love only exists in a reborn Broken Landscape