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Nikkipopgun69 Feb 2021
Sometimes I wonder why I even bother man,
Playing a dangerous game with myself over and over again... from reading in between the lines.... I tell everyone I love them anyway... because it’s nice to feel loved now and again...
But I’d rather die alone...  I mean I’ve been mega broken since May last year so... what does that matter anyway.  I’m done and dusted over anything or everything in a matter of seconds. Don’t know what you did in my pass life everything I do or say I’m always lonely even with company but whatever.

Perhaps if I go away again everything will be better.  Too turn off notifications let’s faces it only a few care anyway...
Nikkipopgun69 Feb 2021
You’re like a tapeworm that’s stuck inside my head. I try to forget about you, it just doesn’t work
I know deep down you don’t feel the same. But I can’t stop liking you.

I wish I could ease the feelings it would be a lot easier.
I play fake scenarios  through my head thinking am I overthinking the whole  situation.. because things you said can mean two things..

But all this overthinking is dragging me down
I just don’t know what to do anymore
I wish they was a such a clearer sign... but
Now I’m just stuck in a limbo instead my head.

I tell everyone I love them if they mean a lot to me. Because I didn’t get to tell one of my friends I loved them before they died. And if I think you’re good looking I’ll tell you that even if I can’t have you.
Being stuck within feelings
Nikkipopgun69 Feb 2021
You can leave me on read
Cos I know you’ve got your own demons
But I have my own too, they eat away at me.
There’s only one thing you need to know  is the truth.

You’ve made me feel something I haven’t in a long time . You’re driving me crazy and my life is such a mess. But you leave me with a smile on my face even though I get nervous around you.

This is like a letter you’ll never read, yeah that ***** but ,  I needed to get my thoughts out
I can’t keep them to myself no more. I’m sick of them eaten me alive. I’ll hype you up no matter what even if I’m down.

I’ll carry on trying to break down your walls... cos you deserve the world. Even if that means I have to let down my own guide . And hurt myself in the long run.
When you love someone and they don’t love you back

— The End —