"i promise," she said quietly to herself,
"i promise that I won't let them hurt me anymore.
i will be stronger than them."

after so much heartbreak in her life
after so many people came into her home, made a mess and broke things
just to leave and make her clean it up by herself
she locked the doors and built a gated wall.
she leaves her windows open but she never lets people inside.
she is rebuilding her beautiful home,
she is making an astonishingly glorious garden
she is making all the pain into a beautiful mosaic
with a "do not touch" sign underneath.
she is becoming brand new
and it's such a beautiful thing.

If I had known how much pain I would be in,
Would I have returned your call?
I would want to say yes.
Be selfless and say that even though it hurt so much that it made me the person I am today.
But I don’t like this person
She can’t trust anyone because it seems like everyone leaves eventually.
It’s made me lonely.
I would have never have returned your call if I had known.
Even though it was fun for a while.
It wasn’t worth the pain in the long run.
That’s how much I despise you.
That tells you how much I deal with anger towards you everyday.
Because if I was in any control of my life,
I would have taken you out of it completely.
There would be a blank
Where you would have been.
Because the thing is that people never stay
But their memories seem to hang on forever.

Having a big heart isn’t a downfall.
Because even though you get ******* over more than others at least you are there for them in the first place.
It means you are stronger than them because of all the times they broke and bruised your heart.
So think that having a big heart and feeling a lot is bad because it means you feel more.
You are made of stardust and you are worth every drop of it.