I remember seeing her
for the first time
and I remember
telling myself that
we'll never be together.

I felt my stomach turn.
It must've been the butterflies
fluttering away
because they know that
they will not be useful
to a man filled
with hopelessness

Sometimes I lay wide awake in bed,
gazing at the stars in my window
and thinking about
our own individual differences
and the secrets that they posses.

And I start to wonder
if someday
there will be someone
brave enough to discover
the depths of my soul
and unlock its secrets that
even I am not aware of.

I am lost
in this abyss
you have created
in my heart.
A hole that
only you can mend;
darkness
that can only be illuminated
with your smile.

I have put so much of myself in you
that after you left me,
it feels like
I don't know myself anymore.

Swirling and swirling,
that was how the coffee went
as I stirred it,
wishing at the same time
that I could go into the whirlpool
and just drown.

And I drank the coffee
without cooling it,
not caring if it burns my throat.
I felt it trace a warm trail
on my esophagus
and scatter on my chest.
It finally reached my heart
which has been cold for so long.
The feeling was comforting.

Softly, her soft and warm
caresses on my face fade
as she takes a dip in the water.
Trailing behind her are
beautiful rays of blonde
and auburn hair.

I watch the spectacular
final act of the sun as she
leaves her stage, bringing
sadness to her spectators;
She takes joy away for
seeing her is joy itself.

And as the world turns dark,
I am overcome with the
feeling of pain and regret
as I realize I didn't watch
the sun set alone before.